"Jester Field detected."
Wait, what was that just now?
A clearly bizarre message had just popped up on my display.
Moreover, while it was in Japanese, it wasn't the version used in the Galactic Empire; it was an ancient dialect. The intonation was archaic—the kind of old language I’d only heard in history lectures back at the Imperial Junior Academy.
"Faiiiiiryyyyyy!" I yelled.
"There is no such feature in the software!" she shouted back.
"Thought so!"
"A system that exists while slipping past my and Kyoko's checks... it’s got quite some nerve!"
A transmission came in from Kyoko. "Your Majesty! Patterns are appearing on the frame’s surface!"
I see. So it was lurking around the frame—or rather, within the defense system. Or maybe it was scattered across various control systems in tiny fragments. Code gets so bloated these days that no matter what you do, unknown elements slip in. It’s like those mysterious comment blocks that somehow make the system run normally, or those nonsensical lines of code that serve no apparent purpose but cause everything to crash if you delete them.
Furthermore, there were still systems and devices whose full usage we didn't understand. We could manufacture them, but our analysis hadn't caught up yet. If the core code was buried in those areas, there was nothing we could do.
Hahaha! As expected, relying on technology you didn't develop from scratch is terrifying!
I didn't exactly have time to comment like a spectator, though. After all, I was the pilot.
I zipped around at an impossibly absurd speed while emitting a radiant light. I even had enough leeway to effortlessly dodge tiny bits of debris.
"Wifey. This is getting weird," I said.
"I know that! Deactivate it immediately!" she barked back.
"No, the thing is... I can see everything, so it’s not actually dangerous. I know exactly what’s in every direction."
I performed a tailspin turn and fired. I shot through every single drone target in one go.
"See? I can perform maneuvers that usually require lethal levels of focus while having a conversation. Man, this is incredible."
"O-oh?"
After brushing off Wifey’s concerns, I turned back to Fairy. "Fairy, generate a deactivation code. Just gradually lower the output and shut the system down."
"Y-yes! Leo-kun, please don't die."
"I don't feel like I'm dying at all~"
In a state of total martial transcendence, I annihilated the remaining targets. This really was amazing. I didn't feel any fatigue, either. In this state, I might have been able to take on a Zork Mother solo.
Himorogi-chan was giggling. Meanwhile, Mini Zashiki-warashi was dancing at the Shinto altar.
Hmm? ...Wait.
Oh, so that was it!
"Zashiki-warashi. Thanks," I said.
I handed the sweets I’d planned to eat after the test to Mini Zashiki-warashi. She started hopping and skipping with joy.
"Can you tell Himorogi-chan to stop now?"
Mini Zashiki-warashi nodded vigorously. Immediately after, the power output began to subside.
The BGM in my head, however, was still that "Boing Boing Boobies" song. The music began to fade out slowly.
So, this machine really did have the effect of amplifying Jester's Ability.
"Leo-kun! Activating the Output Reduction Program!"
"Please."
The energy that had been excessively surging gradually attenuated. Once it settled into a manageable range, the machine came to a complete halt.
Right on cue. The recovery team would be here any second.
Well... while my head was still clear, I should probably write up some reports. Offering things to Zashiki-warashi was fine, but relying on that to stop the machine was a bit of a problem. I’d need to make it so the function could be switched on and off manually.
I also couldn't control the BGM in my head at the moment. If that was the case, maybe I should just play my own music from the start. A simple solution.
"Recovery team has arrived."
"Hey there. Good work."
I pulled the Manual Release Lever and exited the cockpit. The Machine Recovery Team arrived and began towing the Prototype Machine with wires. I was loaded into a Transport Aircraft.
They told me I was headed straight to the hospital just in case! Well, I didn't mind.
And so, the test concluded. I was carried to a battleship and examined by Dr. Kevin, who had effectively become my primary physician.
"So, what happened this time?" she asked.
"I had a sensation as if I had eyes in every direction. I could probably fight a Zork Mother alone like that."
"...Diagnosis: abnormality in mental state."
"Medically speaking, I knew you'd say that!"
I really did know. I saw that coming a mile away.
"I'm joking. In Leo's case, it's likely related to ESP."
"What about Zashiki-warashi and Himorogi-chan?"
"Those are completely outside the realm of medicine."
"Fair point."
For the time being, she ran a brain scan to check my neurochemicals.
"No damage to the brain," she reported.
"That's odd. I went through a battle fierce enough that it wouldn't have been strange if there was at least a little."
My brain could have ended up as full of holes as a veteran football player's. Then again, the theory that it was hollow to begin with was also quite strong.
"It's probably thanks to your Self-recovery Ability."
I see... I wasn't a tank, yet I had tank-like endurance; I wasn't a buffer, yet I had buffing skills. From the bottom of my heart, I really wasn't suited for RPG rules where party slots were limited. I’d probably just be that one character who did nothing but spam recovery items.
However, in a Solo Play or under SLG Logic, I was incredibly strong.
"Can I go home now?"
"No. You're staying for one day. Because, Leo, you always end up on the verge of death right after things like this!"
"True that."
So, Kevin was staying in charge of me. It looked like I was being transported to the hospital in Chronos for a full re-examination.
"Hey, Kevin..."
"What's with the serious face?"
"Well... did anything show up regarding, you know, adult diseases?"
Specifically, gout or diabetes. You see, my old man had them. Even though I’d undergone Genetic Therapy because I carried the markers, my father ended up getting them anyway! And then there were the Urinary Tract Stones.
"Just treat them if you get them! They're curable!"
"I know that, but still!"
It was true they were treatable. But the terrifying thing about those diseases was that by the time you realized something was wrong, you were already in agony! That was why I scrutinized my blood test results with bloodshot eyes every single time!
"You're perfectly healthy! Honestly! Believe in me a little more!"
"I believe in you completely, Kevin. It’s my own body I don't trust. What are you even saying at this point?"
"O-oh? Is that so?"
"Everyone has long since forgiven you, Kevin."
"Exactly."
There were still some people who avoided One-O-One or Kevin. Mostly the serious, straight-laced types. But for people like me or Isono, even the Assassination Incident was a distant memory. I couldn't be bothered to remember every single grudge.
"Hahaha... I see... So that's how it is."
Kevin started to tear up. They weren't sad tears. I gave her a firm pat on the back.
"I'm counting on you from here on out."
I thrust my fist toward her.
"I’ve got you," she said, bumping her fist against mine.