Since things had become such a headache, I decided to just broadcast the "brave" efforts of the Taikyoku citizens on the spherical monitors.
Civilians wearing baseball uniforms were currently swarming into the building.
The culprits were caught and systematically beaten to a pulp.
In the stadium, the Taikyoku Nation people sang their fight songs, cheering on the vigilantes. Even the Taikyoku Nation Police were so terrified of their own citizens that they simply let them do whatever they wanted.
Oh, look, they started a fire.
Plumes of smoke and flame began to rise from the building.
One culprit lay sprawled on the ground, beaten so thoroughly that his pants had been yanked down, leaving his backside completely exposed. An old lady carrying a stick marched up to him and began whaling on his bare cheeks. Then an old man stepped in to kick him in the head, which was finally the cue for the police to intervene and "arrest" the man.
Actually, even the police were wearing the Taikyoku Nation Representative Team uniforms. I couldn't tell them apart from the civilians. At best, you could distinguish them by their bulletproof vests.
Can I just say one thing? This probably wasn't my fault.
And yet, for some reason, the mosaic censoring the crotches of the captured culprits was a picture of my face.
Seriously... who? Who thought of this?
"It looks like some kind of bug," the Fairy said.
"What kind of bug does that!?"
No matter how I looked at it, the Fairy was the one responsible! I know it was you!
A roar of laughter erupted throughout the stadium. Meanwhile, even the Taikyoku children were laughing, though their eyes remained filled with pure, unadulterated rage. The Latarnians looked on with expressions that said, "Well, he is the King of Chronos, I suppose."
The middle-aged Chronosian men were busy clapping and laughing, while the mothers were frantically covering their children's eyes. Sorry about that.
On the other hand, the Ogre God Nation people—men and women alike—were clutching their stomachs and howling. Honestly, they’d been cracking up ever since the footage of me fleeing on my bike was shown.
...I’ll remember this, you guys.
I was so annoyed that I prepared to announce the cancellation of the event once the news segment finished. Suddenly, a hand clamped down on me. Shiyun had grabbed my arm.
"Lord Leo... a riot will break out in Chronos if you do that."
"Really?"
"Just look at our cheering squad."
They were singing a fight song, sure, but... ah! Their eyes definitely weren't laughing!
"I fear even my Royal Guard will become uncontrollable..."
"Why does everyone get like this over baseball!?" I yelled.
"Because baseball and pro-wrestling are our only forms of entertainment!"
"You're right! You're absolutely right!"
I had to give her that.
But what was I supposed to do while the game was interrupted? Usually, this was when I’d turn to Lady Claire, but she was away managing the pro-wrestling circuit.
Wait!
"Save me, Lady Claire!"
On the stadium's giant screen, the "Health Sandal Deathmatch" footage began to play.
"Uooooh! (Short, pained strides)"
"Umyaaaa! (Toddling frantically)"
"Hya! (A chop that lacked any hint of follow-through)"
"Daryah! (An elbow drop while leaning forward awkwardly)"
The Health Sandal Deathmatch was wonderful because it didn't matter if it was a men's or women's match—it was always absurd. The screen currently showed a Taikyoku male athlete and a Chronos female athlete "battling." The man intentionally flopped to the ground to take a breather, only for the woman to seize his foot.
"S-stop! Not that! Anything but that!"
She pressed the nubby surface of the sandal down hard against his foot.
"Gyaaaaaaaa!"
The venue was instantly enveloped in laughter. What a peaceful scene.
As I wiped the sweat from my brow, Shiyun finally smiled.
"Annihilation complete."
"Annihilation?"
"Annihilation ♪"
"What about the interrogations or..."
"Annihilation ♪"
Right. Okay. I’ll just leave that alone.
Turning to the Latarnia side, I checked in. "Umm... Polina-tan. How are things on your end?"
"Tan? ...No, um, we've made arrests. It seems the culprits are mostly students."
"Can students really pull off something like this?"
"Of course they can't!" the Fairy interjected, sounding like she was about to throw a tantrum. "They'd need a massive server for this!"
"Then where is the server?"
"It’s dispersed all over the place!"
"Ehh..."
"Shiyun, you heard the Fairy..."
"I understand," Shiyun said coldly. "I shall have the cheering squad charge in immediately."
"Wait, did you just say 'cheering squad' instead of 'police'?"
"Administrative action requires a legal basis. Don't you agree, Lord Leo? However, if citizens act voluntarily of their own accord, then anything is permitted... wouldn't you say?"
Her eyes were completely bloodshot.
"No, that's terrifying!"
Our Shiyun had officially broken! Does sports really drive people to this extreme?
"Fairy... hurry the investigation. Otherwise, a lot of people are going to die..."
"Roger that!"
I hate this!
Next, I checked in with Melissa and Rikochi.
"Melissa, is the venue security holding up?"
"Yeah, it’s fine. But Rikochi headed out in her full armor."
As I thought, she couldn't just sit still.
"Rikochi! Where are you?"
"Patrolling the venue with the Military Police."
"Any suspicious objects?"
"Nothing yet. What about the server?"
"The attack is still ongoing. We're barely keeping things afloat by borrowing Rosaria's surplus processing power."
"I heard the Taikyoku side burned down an entire building," Rikochi noted. "Are they still being attacked?"
"Huh? Shiyun? Fairy!"
"There’s still an attack coming from the Taikyoku Nation!?"
"Even if we cut the connection, they just pivot to a different server," the Fairy explained.
It didn't make sense anymore. We reached a point where we didn't even know why we were being targeted.
"As I thought, the objective must be to interfere with the sacred game of baseball..."
"No, there's no way that's it," I countered.
If that were the only goal, they wouldn't go to these lengths. No one loses their mind over baseball like this... well, except Shiyun.
Wait.
"Come to think of it, doesn't national collapse usually begin with a cultural influx?"
"And civilizations that refuse dialogue after that typically perish," the Fairy added.
"If the goal really is to prevent cultural influx..."
I immediately contacted Rosaria.
"Charlotte. By any chance, is there a faction over there that’s knowledgeable about computers and opposes establishing diplomatic relations with Chronos?"
"There is," she replied. "But they have no real influence."
"Is it a religious group, perhaps?"
"...It is. Why?"
"Any contact with them?"
"There shouldn't be, but..."
"Are they 'friends' with the Zen God Race, by any chance?"
"They do treat the Zen God Race as a Higher Existence... but they're too small a minority to have any political weight."
"Listen, Charlotte... it's called terrorism because even a tiny group can cause a massive disaster."
"Understood. I shall take them into custody immediately!"
Please, do it!
I looked back at the monitors. Pro-wrestling! Please keep the Taikyoku people from snapping!
"Gyaaaaaaaa!"
Laughter erupted again as the match on screen reached its conclusion with a standard pinfall. The next match was a live one. Please, let it be exciting!
"Masked Nakajima has arrived!"
"Of all people, why you!?" I shouted.
Nakajima entered the ring. Her opponent was a massive guy from the Ogre God Nation. I could only pray that idiot Nakajima wouldn't go completely off the rails.
Go for it, Ogre God Nation! Kill that Nakajima bastard!
I was genuinely praying for her defeat.
"Fuhehehehe~!"
Nakajima brandished a saber. It was the type with a round protective tip to ensure it wasn't lethal, but still...
Ah, it's over.
I felt it in my soul. Everything was about to go to hell.