It was a mercy that Ichinose-san had run off only after we were mostly finished with our meal. If she had bolted just as we were about to open our lunchboxes, the ensuing time would likely have been nothing short of hellish. We were spared that fate when Ashida spoke in a toneless voice, suggesting we head back.
Natsukawa replied with a brief "Yeah," directed solely at Ashida. I quietly looked up at the sky, though all I saw was the concrete ceiling above the piloti. In the corner sat an abandoned swallow’s nest, now just a hollow shell. Endure, my soul... Thou shalt not die. Save me, Akiko...
Wait, was this really okay? Was it safe to follow right behind them? If I trailed them while being treated as if I didn't exist, wouldn't I just look like a stalker? Good grief, I’d just be reverting to how I was a little while ago. Give me a break...
I considered hanging back and returning later, but then Ashida—who had slowed her pace to distance herself from the frosty-looking Natsukawa—gradually approached me. What was this? Had she found a way to break the deadlock? You’re a saint, Ashida. Come here and let me stroke that cowlick.
"Sajocchi, are you an idiot...? What were you trying to pull right in front of us...!"
"Wha—!"
She had lowered her voice to whisper that outrageous accusation.
"You've got it wrong! That was obviously a joke...! How was I supposed to know Ichinose-san would actually try to board the Sajocchi Express...!?"
"Aren't you spoiling her way too much...?! She's that type of girl, you know. If you don't start drawing boundaries, there'll be no turning back soon...!"
"Urgh..."
She was giving me a serious lecture. I wanted to call her presumptuous, but I didn't have a leg to stand on. It was true that the distance between Ichinose-san and me felt a bit too close. Since our first meeting at the bookstore had been the absolute worst, I probably still had some subconscious desire to make her like me. Or maybe it was just that anyone would be kind to a girl like her.
"You’re all about Ichinose-chan. Sajocchi, haven't you forgotten something important...?"
"Huh...? Something important...?"
"The end of this month. Don't tell me you have no idea what's happening...?"
"Hmph, as if I could ever forget."
Indeed, a major event was looming at the end of the month. It wasn't that nuisance known as Halloween, where people went wild in Shibuya. It was something far, far more vital to me. Asking me about it was like asking me my own name.
"It’s the day Natsukawa descended to the lower world, right?"
"That’s the one."
Yes, October 31st was the day Natsukawa was born into this world. In short, her birthday. No, calling it her Descent Day wouldn't be an exaggeration. It marked the beginning of a new era. Come forth, Shenron.
"Have you actually prepared anything?"
"I've been ready since November 1st of last year."
"Heavy."
She shouldn't underestimate me. Especially back then, Natsukawa’s birthday was a sacred day when I could "legally" offer sacrifices to her. What did I even mean by "legally"?
I recalled how, without irony, I’d started planning her next gift the moment the clock struck midnight after her last birthday. Wait, was this even being lovesick anymore? Wasn't I just plain sick? It was pure madness. I could hardly believe Natsukawa was even speaking to me normally these days.
"Wh-Wait...!"
"!"
While Ashida and I were being appalled by my past self, Natsukawa’s voice cut in from up ahead. No, she graced us with her attention. I was truly blessed.
"Wh-What are you two whispering about...?"
"So emo..."
"Eh...?"
"Ah, uh..."
That was close... Natsukawa’s sulky expression was so emo that I almost let the word slip out loud. When my true feelings and my public stance used such similar language, it was easy to get confused. Then again, there was no need to worry; Natsukawa was cute—that was both my public and private stance.
"No, Ashida was just asking me about this month’s—"
"Wait, wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait!!"
"Mgh?! Mmmgh!?"
As I tried to answer normally, Ashida’s hand flew toward my face. She tried to muffle me, but her aim was off, and she landed a palm heel strike right on my cheekbone. Ow... What is wrong with this woman? I’m going to lick her palm. Am I allowed to? Can I just give it a little lick?
As I struggled with a surge of lust that overrode my pain, Ashida immediately let go and grabbed my shoulders, spinning me around to face her.
"Wait, you were totally about to say it normally just now, weren't you? Weren't you? Usually, you’re supposed to keep surprises a secret, right?"
"Well, given our history, what’s the point of a surprise? I was just planning to head to school early and be the first person to hand it over, like, 'Here’s your present.'"
"What’s with that 'one tablespoon' level of passion...? I don't even know how to react to that."
"Goodness...! What is it?!"
When I turned back, Natsukawa was waving both hands in front of her chest, fuming. See, Ashida? Natsukawa-san got angry because you tried to exclude her. People get hurt when you do things like that.
"Wawa, don't be mad, Aichi! There’s a deep reason for this...!"
"...What reason?"
"It’s because... right! I was lecturing Sajocchi! Telling him he’s way too close to Ichinose-chan!"
"......"
Hey, cut it out. Don't use me and Ichinose-san as a shield. If things get awkward with Natsukawa on top of everything else, I’ll actually die.
Hearing Ashida’s excuse, Natsukawa looked up at me with a cold, lingering stare. This was bad... It was a rare expression, but right now, it gave me the chills. It felt like I was being backed into a corner...
"...I-I'll be more careful from now on."
"...Mm."
Arguing was a losing move. Following that mysterious intuition, I offered a one-sentence apology. Natsukawa paused for a moment before delivering her verdict with a soft sound of acknowledgment, then turned away with a huff and walked on.
"Blehh."
"You little..."
Ashida stuck her tongue out at me, then ran up to Natsukawa and jumped onto her back. A high-pitched "Kyah!" pierced the eardrums of my soul. I was so jealous; if I were a girl, maybe I could have cheered her up like that too... I figured I should probably keep my distance for a while.
Then again, even Ashida had gone into full lecturing mode over what happened with Ichinose-san, and Natsukawa cares about lifestyle habits as much as a primary school teacher. I could understand why witnessing a scene like that would sour her mood.
"......"
I was starting to lose track of how I should be acting.
I was supposed to be mindful of not wasting time on a "flower on a high peak" to avoid feeling miserable, yet here I was, continuing to interact with her without a care in the world. I’d even received a lucky hug from behind yesterday; it seemed I’d be devoted to Natsukawa for the foreseeable future. Men really are fools... I just hope I don't accidentally make her angry again.
Watching the two of them start their little yuri scene a bit further ahead, my worries became fuel for a Big Bang on the far side of the universe.
When I returned to the classroom, Shirai-san and Okamo-chan also interrogated me about why Ichinose-san was acting so strange. Being subjected to verbal attacks from four different girls in a single day, I sank onto the dusty floor. Did you know...? Harsh words from girls are super effective against boys. They’re a cheat skill—guaranteed critical hits with infinite ammo. There’s no need to play a horror game with no saves for a thrill. If I hadn't been trained by Nee-chan, I would be making a slow, somber march to the rooftop by now. Lord—give the men of this world hearts of steel.
Once Fifth Period ended, I rushed into the boys' room. For the first time in my life, I felt that being in a space with girls was exhausting... By chance, I ran into a guy from my middle school, and a conversation with the IQ of a twelve-year-old helped patch up my weary heart. It felt like it had been a while since I’d enjoyed that kind of mindless vibe.
"Ah."
"Hieee!"
"Hey, what’s with that reaction?"
I stepped out of the restroom and turned toward the voice; Ashida was coming out of the girls' room. Encountering Ashida—or rather, a girl in general—made me yelp in surprise. That apparently didn't sit well with her, as she stomped over and glared up at me.
"Girls are scary."
"That’s your own fault, Sajocchi."
I never dreamed that just being considerate toward Ichinose-san would lead to this. From now on, I’m done offering to be her backrest, even as a joke. The joke is starting to feel a bit too real.
"Anyway, shouldn't you be that kind to Aichi too?"
"Eh, wouldn't that just be creepy?"
"Well, 'Want to use my lap?' was definitely the ultimate level of joke."
"The ultimate level."
Yeah, that wasn't an exaggeration... Even without thinking about it carefully, saying that to a girl my age was dangerous. If it had been anyone other than Ichinose-san, the story would have reached the Disciplinary Committee, then the school, my parents, the police, and finally Nee-chan, and my life would have been over.
"Well, I guess you barely passed because you actually remembered Aichi’s birthday..."
"Listen, did you really think I’d forget?"
"I didn't, but... given that vibe, you must have celebrated it pretty grandly last year."
"Not really. It’s only natural to be celebrated on your birthday, right? Natsukawa reached her birthday, so she was celebrated as she deserved to be. That’s all there was to it."
"So, what did you give her for her birthday last year?"
"A necklace."
"Heavy."
No, it wasn't heavy. It was a necklace for Natsukawa, you know? With her beauty, those gorgeous collarbones should be veiled by a silver chain. Just as people wear clothes, Natsukawa should naturally cover the décolletage that peeks through the gap in her collar. Ever since middle school, whenever my fetishes were about to go off the rails, that décolletage always set me straight. Someone please just execute me.
"Last year, you were still in middle school, right...? Ugh, I bet she definitely had no idea what to do with it..."
"Stop with the 'ugh'... Well, she did look pretty troubled, to be honest..."
Why didn't I realize that it might actually be a burden for her back then? Did I have this mindset where the price tag equals the depth of love...? Dangerous, dangerous. I just now recalled Natsukawa’s strained smile from last year. That was a look I definitely don't want to see again... This year won't be like that. The current me will be fine.
"So, you said you’ve been thinking about this year’s present since last year?"
"Until a little while ago, yeah. Obviously, I can't buy something like that now."
"What were you planning to buy...?"
Next year I’ll be a high schooler—so I should be able to buy brand-name items. That was my logic when I graduated middle school. What’s chilling is the realization that I might have been thinking the same thing until just recently. A burning passion is dangerous; it drives people mad. I’m glad I’ve finally learned to understand my own place in the world...
"So, you’re buying something a bit more modest this year?"
"I guess. Like I said earlier, I have to consider my current relationship with Natsukawa too."
"U-Umm... That, in its own way..."
What? It’s fine, isn't it? It’s actually really hard to find something that’s neither too cheap nor too expensive. It shows more effort than just lazily buying something pricey. Don't underestimate my taste, okay?
"By the way, what is it?"
"A ring."
"Heavy."
It only weighs about three grams.