The flag for Sasaki’s social death had been raised, and as lunch break began, the flag for me being slaughtered by Nee-chan—unconditionally, mind you—was hoisted right alongside it. Natsukawa and Ashida had disappeared to parts unknown, and since I had work to do today as well, I heaved myself up with a weary "yo-ho." Just then, a message arrived on my phone.
【You don’t have to come today.】
Wait, really? Did she mean I didn't need to go to the Student Council Room, or was she just rejoicing that this day had finally come? It was definitely the former. Definitely.
Come to think of it, I hadn't really talked to Nee-chan much from the weekend through today. Honestly, we don’t interfere in each other's private lives... though there was an air about her that suggested she’d been at cram school. It was a fact that she hadn’t been home much. It was rare for us to go this long without talking.
"Yo, Sajou! We haven't talked much since the seat shuffle!"
"Yamazaki."
A Wild Yamazaki appeared! He was as high-tension as ever. Back in the day, our archetypes overlapped a bit, so I used to feel a strange sense of rivalry toward him. What I understood least of all was why he felt a sense of rivalry toward me, too. I’d realized a while ago that it was probably just because he hated losing.
Sasaki is a handsome guy, and honestly, if we're just talking about faces, Yamazaki is actually quite the looker himself. However, Yamazaki serves as living proof that whether or not you're popular depends heavily on your daily behavior. It was strange; just talking to him made me feel as if my IQ were being chipped away bit by bit.
"You're way off in the corner, man. I guess when you don't have any buddies nearby, you've got no choice but to stay quiet."
"And who exactly counts as your 'buddy'?"
"Don't underestimate me, you idiot. When you're on my level, the girls just flock to you. Lately, Koga and I have been talking about this and that..."
"Huh? You... and Koga?"
Koga. She was one of those girls in our class you really didn't want to cross. She was on the smaller side, but she was in the tennis club and used her deep tan and her utter, almost reckless inability to read the room as weapons to intimidate those around her. Yamazaki probably started talking to her through Murata from the girls' basketball club.
This isn't limited to our class, but no matter how elite the prep school is, there’s always a rowdy crowd—and not just among the boys. The kind of girls who’ll announce at the top of their lungs, "I’m gonna go do it with that guy from such-and-such school later." I really wish they'd stop shouting about the details of what they did with "that guy" while sitting right near my seat.
Even high school boys whose brains are permanently stuck in the gutter tend to steer clear of that crowd. To get close to them, you have to be just as rowdy or be the athletic type. It felt like Yamazaki was walking that tightrope with his high tension. Actually, now that I think about it, his looks and athletic specs were way higher than mine... how did that work?
"—Hmm? Murata’s here too, you know. You wanna grab lunch with us, Sajou?"
"Huh?"
With a plastic bag containing a sweet bun I’d bought this morning dangling from my hand, Yamazaki threw an arm around my shoulder and dragged me toward the windows—the exact opposite side of the room—where Koga and the others were boisterously engaged in some lewd conversation. Ugh, they were sitting cross-legged or with their legs wide open, so you could basically see everything... For some reason, I just couldn't find that kind of thing erotic at all.
"Yo, this guy's joining us."
"Wait, for real?! It's an appearance by Sajou! What's up? You wanna join in too?"
"He's been so quiet lately. What, are you an introvert now?"
They were going full throttle right from the start. Just looking at people like this completely demolished any ideals I had about girls. When I thought about the fact that even Natsukawa or Ashida might have a side like this, something deep in my heart started to cool down. Well, I guess that’s reality. The Yamato Nadeshiko, the ideal modest woman? What’s that, something you can eat?
"I'm an introvert, through and through. Just look at my seat."
"Kyahaha! Right in the front! In the corner! That’s hilarious!"
And what was with me, firing back at the rowdy types' teasing like that? It was a strange thing; once you earned a certain amount of speaking rights in class, they’d play along with you. I seriously didn't get it. Hilarious. In short, Yamazaki had his way, and I had mine.
"By the way, hasn't it been crazy lately? How's it going with Natsukawa-chan?"
"We haven't seen a married couple's spat in a while."
"Yamazaki, how dare you steal my bit."
"I didn't steal anything!?"
I threw in a decent joke to steer the conversation back to the safe zone. Being able to change the atmosphere with a single word almost made me feel like I was good at talking. Though, it might just be that their bar for humor was incredibly low, since they seemed to find everything hilarious.
"Anyway, how far have you guys gone?"
"Yeah, for real. You've been like that since middle school, right? Have you banged yet? Did you bang?"
That didn't even last a minute. What was with these girls and their obsession with dirty talk? Even guys didn't think about it that constantly. I couldn't even see them as girls anymore.
"Are you morons? I don't even know where she lives."
"Wait, no way! You don't know where Natsukawa-san lives?! You've failed as a husband!"
"What the heck, you haven't made any progress at all? Maybe you're just not charming enough?"
They really said whatever they wanted. Did they honestly think they were charming? Once a girl starts looking natural sitting with her legs apart like a middle-aged man, it’s over for her as a woman. As long as people knew what they were like now, they'd never be able to date a decent guy. To put it bluntly, who could ever love someone who was so... tarnished in so many ways? I'm sorry, I'm truly sorry.
"Well, yeah. Sajou’s face isn't exactly all that, after all."
"True. If it's like that, I guess even I'd have to pass."
Huh? Yamazaki, you bastard, what did you just say? You’d certainly gotten cocky in the short time we hadn't talked. You shouldn't say things like that unless you can brag about someone actually confessing to you—... wait, knowing him, he actually might have some stories he just hadn't told. A good-looking guy in the basketball club was basically a status symbol for girls. Whether they actually liked his personality or not, there was a good chance girls would want to date him just for the prestige.
"Then what about you, Yamazaki?"
"Oh, I'm popular as hell! I get confessed to pretty often!"
"For instance? Who? Speak up, you bastard."
"Sajou’s pissed! This is hilarious!"
"Wait, seriously, who? I’m actually curious."
Well? Come on, spit it out. You’re in the middle of this group, you know. Don't think you're walking away from here in silence, Yamazaki. Depending on your answer, from today onward, Koga and the others are going to treat you like you've got a short fuse in your pants. I’m serious. If it were me, I’d be crying into my pillow.
"Don't be shocked when you hear it. It’s Okumura from Class A."
"Okumura... Murata, by the way, what kind of girl is she?"
"Eh? 〇〇〇〇."
"Well, she probably wasn't serious."
I hesitated to even put it into words... birds of a feather really did flock together. This was a prep school, wasn't it? Hello, Shinomiya-senpai? The public morals of this school weren't being protected at all. Our class representative had clearly already given up and gone indifferent. Good luck, Iiboshi-san!
"..."
Yamazaki went silent. Hey, say something, please. I really didn't want to be the one stuck entertaining these two girls. The only thing I had to talk about was Natsukawa... oh wait, I did have that. But I didn't want to preach the gospel to people like this.
"Well, obviously. What about you, Sajou? What about that girl from the other day?"
"Huh?"
"The girl from the other day. You know, the one with the light brown hair."
...Were they talking about Aizawa? No way, use your head. There was no way anything was happening between us. In fact, at first, I thought Aizawa was one of those types like Koga and her friends. But she was different now. Now, she was a comrade-in-arms! That was a nice cream puff, Aizawa! Natsukawa was happy!
I couldn't betray a comrade. Looking at their faces, they no doubt assumed Aizawa was one of their kind. But in reality, she was a good girl who was properly bewildered by my religious devotion to Natsukawa.
"Aizawa is—"
"Wataru!"
Wait, my follow-up for Aizawa! Oh, come on! I was just about to back her up and I couldn't! Aizawa had been devoted to Arimura-senpai since the day she enrolled! They were already walking through the hallways being all lovey-dovey—according to Ashida... wait, why was I thinking that? I felt like saying it would only make Aizawa’s reputation worse.
Anyway, who interrupted me? If bad rumors about Aizawa spread because of this, what was I going to do? Interfering with that couple was honestly nothing but evil.
"Wataru, wait...!!"
"What... is—... huh?"
I'll set them straight! With that kind of resolve, I turned around, only to find Natsukawa standing there with a demon-like expression. I never expected to find someone even angrier than I was... and a voice that didn't sound like a man's cracked in the back of my throat. Wait, uh, why are you so obviously furious...?
"Come with me!!!"
"Eh, hey!? Wait, don't pull so suddenly...!"
Her forceful insistence left no room for argument, and both the scenery before my eyes and the thoughts in my head turned into a jumbled mess. She pulled me so hard that my hip clipped the teacher's lectern, but I felt like that was the least of my worries. Natsukawa's loud voice was still echoing in my head. What on earth was happening?
"Wait— whoa, whoa, whoa— guheh!?"
I was dragged out into the hallway, past the stairs leading to the upper floor, and then hurled with a crash in front of the closed Music Room. Terrified of the approaching door, I tried to fix my posture, but I didn't make it in time. Along with a heavy impact, a manga-like "Smack!" rang out. What... what just happened?
With my back against the sturdy, soundproof door, I slowly slid down to the floor. In front of me stood Natsukawa, still looking furious for some reason. Why!? Why!?
"Haa... Haa..."
Whoa, she was panting, and her shoulders were shaking! What, am I gonna die? Is something horrible about to happen to me? For real? Please, be gentle—no, that’s not it, this looks really bad.
Calm down, me! Think about what you did! The reason Natsukawa is angry... it has to be because of my actions up until now!
—I had so many ideas from the past several months that I couldn't tell which one it was!