The new Student Council lineup was finally official.
The President was the "Perfect Superhuman," Miss Perfect herself—Rui Kuroki.
The Vice President was me, Ryouta Izumiya—otherwise known as the "perverted harem-building loner (virgin edition)."
The Secretary General was the returnee and the first-years’ rising star, Nozomi Himesaki.
Up to that point, everything was exactly as I’d expected.
The problem, however, lay elsewhere.
Specifically, with the fact that my best friend, Kanade Tanaka—a girl who possessed the negative trifecta of being a loner, a fujoshi, and a total social outcast—had been plucked from obscurity to serve as the "Chief of Accounting, Public Relations, and Digital Affairs."
First of all, what kind of title was "Chief of Accounting, Public Relations, and Digital Affairs" anyway?
I wanted to snap at her, but the sheer absurdity of Tanaka being chosen for anything official was so overwhelming that my brain couldn't even formulate the proper snark.
The moment the morning assembly ended, I fought against the tide of students heading back to their classrooms and bolted toward the stage where Rui was still standing.
When I arrived, I found Himesaki and Tanaka already there, chatting away with Rui as if they’d been a team for years.
"Rui-senpai! Thank you so much for appointing me as Secretary General!"
"The pleasure is mine, Himesaki-san. I’m looking forward to working with you."
"Man, I didn't expect Himesaki-san to be picked too, but I guess it makes sense," Tanaka chimed in.
"Wait just a damn minute! Hey!"
I couldn't help but wedge myself into the conversation.
"Tanaka, why are you acting like this is totally normal? Never mind whether Himesaki’s appointment makes sense—you being here is the biggest anomaly of the century!"
"What’s with that attitude? That’s so mean, Ryouta-kun! Despite my looks, I was the only second-year brave enough to stand up to the great Rui Kuroki! My appointment is perfectly logical!"
Well, she did have a point there. It had been such a guaranteed defeat that her participation was borderline heroic...
"Even so, there’s such a thing as suitability. And what’s with that ridiculously long title? Chief of Accounting, Public Relations, and Digital Affairs?"
"If we’re talking about suitability, you’re the one in the hot seat, Ryouta-kun! I seriously doubt you can handle being the Vice President."
"I-It’s not about whether I can or can’t—I’ve already decided to do it! I told Rui as much back in the summer!"
In the first place, I had to be an absolute nervous wreck and practically beg Rui to let me be Vice President. For Tanaka to just waltz into the Student Council because she'd become some weird VTuber... I just couldn't wrap my head around it!
"You told her? Is that true, Kuroki-san?" Himesaki asked, her eyes wide.
"It’s true. That confession I heard from Ryouta-kun under the scorching sun on that midsummer day... I can still remember it vividly."
"Wh-Wh-Wait! Ryouta-kun! What do you mean, 'confession'?! There’s no way a perpetual virgin like Ryouta-kun could ever pull off a confession!"
"No, it wasn't that kind of confession! And Rui, stop embellishing the story just to brag!"
"Ah, geez! Everyone, please calm down!"
As we were bickering, Himesaki cut in, her voice sharp with annoyance.
Himesaki had actually snapped.
"Since the four of us are going to be running the Student Council as a new team, we should try to get along! Ryouta-senpai, are you really going to doubt Rui-senpai’s judgment after you chose to believe in her?"
"Well, I mean..."
"No 'buts'! And Tanaka-senpai, if you’re Ryouta-senpai’s friend, then you should be the first one to acknowledge him as Vice President! Ryouta-senpai is kind and decisive. Even when I was being a bit difficult, he stayed by my side and listened to my problems. More than that, Ryouta-senpai is the one and only person who teaches me about being perverted! I won't allow anyone to make fun of him!"
"Wh-Why is the defense for Ryouta-kun so weirdly intense?" Tanaka muttered, recoiling slightly.
I’d thought Himesaki just saw me as a friend, but I hadn't realized she held me in such high regard.
I guess perversion really was a bond worth having.
"Ryouta-kun? I’ll be interrogating you later about your 'perverted lessons' with Himesaki-san behind my back. Prepare yourself."
Rui’s face was a mask of cold, dead seriousness.
Yeah, being a pervert really was a death sentence.
"I get it, Himesaki. I’ll stop giving Tanaka a hard time, but I still want to know why she was given such a mouthful of a title."
"The reason I gave Tanaka-san that position? Well, it’s a bit complicated," Rui explained.
Complicated? Could there really be anything deep about choosing Tanaka?
"Tanaka-san has the second-highest grades in our year after me, but she has a habit of skipping class, doesn't she?"
"Guh... I-I mean..."
"So, in exchange for the faculty turning a blind eye to her truancy, I’ve arranged for her to work like a pack horse for the Student Council. That’s why the title is so long. From now on, she’ll be handling all the accounting, PR, and digital-related tasks. I expect you to devote your body and soul to the Council, Tanaka-san. You understand?"
"GYAAAH! NO-BULLY-THE-TANAKA!"
The smug look vanished from Tanaka’s face instantly. Having been forcibly conscripted into a "black company" environment, she let out a cry that sounded like a mangled internet meme.
It wasn't even remotely cute.
"Also, there’s one more person I need to introduce to you all tomorrow," Rui added.
"Someone else?"
"The teacher in charge of the Student Council. The previous advisor took maternity leave, so a new teacher is arriving this autumn to take over. Apparently, they start tomorrow."
A substitute teacher arriving mid-semester was going to be our advisor?
Given the current teacher shortage, I supposed it made sense, but I couldn't help but feel a bit uneasy.
Then again, with "Miss Perfect" Rui Kuroki running the show, there probably wasn't much for an advisor to actually do. Maybe the school trusted her enough to give her a rookie.
I wondered what kind of teacher they would be.