"You don't know about the syrup? That's the absolute basics of beetle hunting."
"E-even if you tell me it's the basics..."
A self-proclaimed city boy like me had never gone insect collecting in his life.
"Anyway, aren't there tons of beetles if you just go into the woods? I bet they're buzzing around right now."
"So naïve! You're being way too naïve, Ryouta! If it were that easy to find rhinoceros or stag beetles, nobody would have to work for them!"
"I-is that so?"
I didn't really get it. I’d just assumed that if you went to a forest in the countryside, the trees would be covered in insects, and I’d be able to catch a bunch and head home early. Was it really that much of an ordeal?
"In the first place, the best window for beetles is from late at night until early morning. You have to spread bait to lure them out."
"Oh... I see."
"So let's get moving on the prep!"
"Wait, right now!?"
"Of course! Come on, to the kitchen!"
Airi really went full-throttle whenever the topic turned to something she loved.
I followed Airi into the kitchen, where the former busty grandmother—aka BB—was holding a container of some weird-colored "stuff" that looked like a mixture of fermented bananas and shochu.
"Here you go, Airi. I've got it all ready for you."
"Thanks, Grandma!"
Airi took it from BB and set it on the kitchen sink.
"W-what is that? It's gross."
"This is the bait we use to lure the beetles, silly."
"Bait? We're using that?"
"Yep. If you use this syrup made from bananas and shochu, the beetles will come flocking!"
"H-huh..."
It was visibly fermented, and the smell was certainly potent. I guessed it was meant to mimic the scent of the tree sap that beetles loved.
"So we just smear that on the trees?"
"We'll smear some on the bark, but I brought these along too—"
Airi pulled something stretchy out of her pocket.
"Ta-da! Stockings!"
Presenting them like a certain cat-shaped robot, Airi showed them off by stretching them between her hands.
They were flesh-colored stockings. Just looking at that sheer texture was enough to make a guy's heart race.
(S-s-s-stockings!?)
"I'm going to put the syrup inside these stockings and tie them around the trees overnight! Then, by tomorrow morning, there'll be tons of beetles—"
"T-this is...!"
"Eh? What's wrong, Ryouta?"
"Using something as precious as a girl's stockings to lure beetles! You won't just attract beetles, you'll attract perverts!"
I shouted, my eyes wide with shock.
"H-huh? Ryouta, what are you even talking about?"
"It's legally permissible for them to swarm all over a girl's stockings? Beetles are treated way too well!"
"Wait, Ryouta, calm down!"
"How can I be calm!? Listen, I'm confiscating these immediately—"
"Those are brand new! I bought them at the hundred-yen shop!"
...B-brand new?
So they weren't... ones that Airi had actually worn.
"Phew. Okay. Let's hurry up and stuff the bait in."
"Good grief! What is with you!?"
I cooled my head instantly and urged her to get on with the prep.
(If they're just brand-new ones from a shop... then they're just normal stockings.)
"Ryouta, you really are a total pervert, aren't you?"
Airi gave me a look of pure exasperation, her eyes half-lidded with scorn.
"I... I won't deny it. But all guys are perverts."
"They are?"
"Obviously. But girls are no different. When a girl sees a handsome guy, she definitely thinks 'Take me!' right? It's the same thing."
I threw out some random nonsense that sounded vaguely plausible. In reality, it was 100% my own prejudice speaking.
"Hmm. Airi doesn't feel like that. For one thing, I'm not even interested in handsome guys."
"Y-you're not? Surely that's not true."
"It is! I care way more about a guy's personality and his kind heart than his face!"
Personality and heart, huh?
That was very typical of Airi—or maybe she felt that way because she was such a kind soul herself.
"Then have you already found this ideal 'Prince' with the perfect personality and heart?" I asked, being intentionally difficult.
Since she was so childish, I figured there was no way she'd found anyone yet.
"I... I have found him. Though he was more of a Princess than a Prince."
"Huh? A Princess? Does that mean you like girls, Airi? I mean, that's fine in its own way, but..."
"Sigh... You're totally wrong! You dummy, Ryouta!"
W-what did she mean, dummy?
But it seemed she wasn't into girls after all. Then who on earth was this "Princess" supposed to be?
"Seriously, Ryouta, you're just a dummy who's only good at studying!"
"Why are you suddenly insulting me like that?"
"...Hmph!"
"What? Are you mad?"
"Yeah, I'm super mad!"
"Normally people who are actually mad don't announce it like that."
"I really am mad! Fine! Since it's come to this, I'm not just using the stockings—I'm going to wrap the bait in your underwear and hang it from a tree!"
"Huh? What kind of stupid—hey!"
As she blurted out that ridiculous threat, Airi immediately reached for my waist and tried to strip off my underwear.
"Off with them!"
"Whoa, hey! Stop being a moron!"
"Oh my. You two certainly are energetic in the middle of the day."
"B—I mean, Grandma! T-this is a misunderstanding!!"
I was too busy fighting to protect my lower half to offer any explanation.