Before heading back to my base, I stopped by Penpen’s place.
Gin-chan gave a polite bow.
“Welcome home, Master. Kon.”
“Eh?”
“...Welcome home, Master. Kon.”
“I-I’m home?”
“I shall show you to your seat, kon.”
“Seat? Kon?”
For the time being, I let her lead the way. It was Penpen’s Home, looking much like it always did, though it seemed a little tidier than usual.
When I took my customary seat at the table, Penpen was already there waiting for me.
“Welcome back-ssu, Tria-chan. Or is it Tria-shi right now-ssu?”
“Yeah, I’m back. What’s with the ‘Master’ business, Penpen? Did you start a maid cafe while I was gone?”
“I was just in the mood for it, so we’re playing maid cafe-ssu! Tria-chan and Alto-chan were both out on missions, after all.”
I see. Playing maid cafe, huh?
You have excellent taste! Honestly, I thought it was a great idea. I wanted omurice. I really wanted to eat omurice with a magic spell cast over it!
I suppose my colleague must have called Alca-chan in to help out too.
“But Penpen, aren't you actually Gin-chan’s master?”
“Tsk, tsk, tsk. I wanted to enjoy being a temporary Master from a customer's perspective! That was the vibe I was going for-ssu! Gin-chan’s awkward character verbal tic is part of the whole thing-ssu.”
“I see.”
Well, if that was the mood she was in, I wasn't going to stop her. Gin-chan didn't seem to hate it; she just looked a bit bewildered, so I didn't feel the need to intervene.
Besides, being called “Master” by a silver fox maid didn’t feel bad at all. Not one bit!!
“Penpen-sama! I don’t want to be called Master! I want to be called Big Sister!!”
“Now, now, Miti-chan. The best part of a maid cafe is being called Master... Oh, wait. Come to think of it, for girls, it’s not Master, it’s Ojou-sama, isn't it-ssu!?”
“You’re quite the stickler for detail. Well, I’m fine with Master.”
“Understood-ssu. In that case, Gin-chan, call me Ojou-sama!”
“I understand, Ojou-sama. Kon.”
Hmm, aside from the fact that Penpen didn't exactly look the part of a refined lady, she was actually pulling it off quite well.
“Does Miti-chan want to wear a maid outfit too-ssu?”
“Yeah! I’m gonna call Spirit-sama Master!”
『Tria wants to call Spirit-sama Master too. Requesting to switch later.』
“Yeah, later, Tria-chan.”
And so, Miti-chan joined the maid staff.
She used her mimicry to change her clothes instantly. I didn't know she could do that; it was incredibly convenient. Sorry, Penpen, but keep a maid outfit ready for Tria-chan to wear later.
“Anyway, Penpen, if you’re going to call yourself an Ojou-sama, shouldn't you dress the part?”
“...Oh, now that you mention it, I look more like a merchant from a farm than a high-class lady-ssu. I’ll go change for a bit-ssu. Let’s see, I think I have some ‘Virgin-Killing Clothes’ around here somewhere...”
Penpen rummaged through the Home’s warehouse and pulled out an outfit.
It was a neat and lovely design—a white shirt with a corset, paired with a sophisticated black skirt.
Oh no. If she wore that with her incredible body, it might actually be the death of me...!
“Equipment change-ssu... Hyaun! How do I put this on? G-Gin-chan, help me!”
“Yes, yes. Please leave it to me, Penpen... There we go.”
“...Ugyuu!...”
At least they had the sense to move to the closet room to change.
“I’ve changed-ssu!!”
“Whoa, a lady. A lady has arrived. At least visually, she’s a perfect Ojou-sama!”
“I am an Ojou-sama-wa-ssu!”
Penpen, having undergone a total transformation from a country girl, stepped back into the room. But her speech was still pure Penpen! What a tragedy. If she hadn't opened her mouth, I would have been a goner.
“Tria-shi should become an Ojou-sama too-ssu! Here, this is your share.”
“Whoa, it’s a lady's shirt with ruffles running down both sides of the buttons. Very stylish.”
“Go with these black and checkered suspenders and skirt-ssu! I’ll even throw in a beret!”
“Man, I’m really going to turn into a lady. Equipment change, click.”
The screen darkened for a split second, and then the change was complete.
When I caught a glimpse of myself in the full-length mirror, I saw an incredibly cute girl staring back.
I put so much time into the character creator, and she turned out to be exactly my type!!
“Hyahhoo! You look like you’re about to perform in a piano competition-ssu! It really suits you-ssu!”
“This is... me...!? I’m a total lady! A total lady!”
“Alright, now you’re a lady too-ssu! Gin-chan, Miti-chan, call Tria-shi Ojou-sama as well!”
“Understood, kon. ...Ojou-sama, would you care for a drink? Kon?”
“Would you like something, Ojou-sama!”
“Ahem... Well then, I suppose I’ll have some tea. Lots of milk, if you please. ...How was that?”
“A total Ojou-sama-ssu! So cute!”
“Please have some milk tea. It’s freshly squeezed, kon.”
Ahahaha! In games like this, the one who has the most fun wins! And man, this milk tea was delicious.
“Oh, it looks like Alto-shi and the others are back-ssu.”
“Hmm? How can you tell, Penpen?”
“An online notification popped up in the group chat-ssu. Tria-shi was showing as offline during the quest too.”
I hadn't enabled that notification myself.
I see. I guess that quest took place in something like an instance space and was restricted to solo play. It might have been different if we had formed a party beforehand.
“—Welcome home, Ojou-sama. Kon.”
“Uo, I’m home-dao... Kon?”
Wow, Alto was a natural. She didn't seem fazed by the “Ojou-sama” greeting at all.
She walked in leading Nika-chan, who was busy licking a piece of candy.
“Nn-ooo? What’s all this-dao? Is today a day for dressing up-uo?”
“We’re playing maid cafe-ssu!”
“Right now, we are all ladies. Desu-wa.”
“I see-dao. But if it’s a maid cafe, shouldn't the greeting be ‘Master’-dao?”
“Alto-shi, in a maid cafe, the female customers are called ‘Ojou-sama’-ssu.”
“Heh. I’ve only ever been to them in games, so I didn't know-uo.”
That made sense. In games where maid cafes appeared, the protagonist was usually a guy. Unless it was a simulator for the employees.
“...Wait. Does that mean Alto just naturally accepted being called Ojou-sama?”
“Could she be a real-life Ojou-sama!? Oh no-ssu, I’d better start sucking up to her-ssu!”
“Stop that, Penpen-shi. Right now, I’m just an ordinary worker-dao... Hmph. Once upon a time, I lived in a massive mansion on ten thousand square meters of land, kept a giant white dog, and wore a plush toweling gown after a bath while a cat sat on my lap. I would look down on the lives of commoners from the window of my skyscraper, laughing nihilistically with a glass of wine in hand-dao... until the Great Disaster took everything away...”
“I-I can feel the darkness-ssu...!”
That was definitely a lie. No real lady would laugh nihilistically with a glass of wine like that. And setting aside the pets, she needed to pick between the massive mansion or the skyscraper.
“Well, jokes aside, Alto-chan is naturally cute and lady-like-dao.”
“Come to think of it, the character Alto-chan is based on was the world’s greatest princess diva. If she’s a princess, she’s definitely an Ojou-sama.”
“Exactly-dao. Which is why you’re going to give that neat and tidy lady's outfit to Alto-chan too-uo! I’ll pay whatever it costs-dao!”
“Yes, with pleasure-ssu!!”
After that, Alto played the part of a redundantly high-quality lady, and we spent the rest of the time switching roles between being the ladies and operating the second character.
The omurice, complete with a heart drawn in ketchup, was absolutely delicious.