"Hey, you two."
"Huh?"
When Rest spoke up, the men—their faces flushed deep red with rage—spun around to face him.
Suppressing the urge to shout back, Rest kept his voice as level and calm as possible.
"That bottle flew right toward our table. You could have seriously injured someone!"
He was merely stating the obvious and expecting an apology, but the only response he received was a pair of gruff roars.
"Shut up! We’re a bit busy here!"
"Keep out of this, brat! This is grown-up business, so keep your nose out of it!"
"...If you truly consider yourselves adults, I suggest you start acting like it. If you’re going to fight, take it somewhere where you won't bother everyone else."
He continued to appeal to their reason, but the men only grew more heated, barking and howling at him.
"Shut up, shut up! If you’ve got a problem, then you're the one who should get out!"
"We’re having an important talk! Get in our way again and I’ll kill you first!"
"Oh, nooo! Stop it! Don't fight over me, you three! Plee-ease, stop!"
While the men hurled insults, the woman wailed utter nonsense.
The brawling men were irritating enough, but for some reason, Rest found the woman the most aggravating of the bunch.
"...Bow your heads and apologize. Do that, and I’ll let this go."
Rest narrowed his eyes, giving them a final ultimatum.
The men’s answer came not in words, but with a clenched fist.
"Grah!"
One of the men lunged forward with a punch. His footing was unsteady from the alcohol, but the strike was surprisingly sharp.
"Fortitude."
Rest didn't bother dodging; he took the blow directly on his forehead. However, he used magic to instantly harden his defense.
"Gugh...!"
A heavy thud rang out, like metal striking stone.
Immediately after, the man who had thrown the punch clutched his right hand and doubled over in agony.
"Gueeeeeeeeeee! I-It’s so haaaaaaaaaard!"
The man’s fist had already begun to swell significantly, and his fingers were twisted in unnatural directions. They were clearly broken. It was a gruesome sight, enough to make anyone wince.
"Th-this kid... what kind of iron skull does he have...!"
"You bastard! You’ve done it now!"
The other man grabbed a different liquor bottle and swung it over his head. It was baffling; despite their mutual hatred moments ago, he was now backing up his rival. Rest couldn't tell if they were enemies or allies.
"I’m not interested in getting my clothes soaked in cheap ale."
Getting hit wouldn't have actually hurt him, but Rest leaned back to evade the descending bottle. As he slipped past the man’s guard, he drove a backfist squarely into his face.
"Gugeh...!"
The man’s nose snapped, and he collapsed onto the floor, writhing in pain. It was a clean hit; he wouldn't be getting up again for a while.
"Ugh... Damn it..."
"Agugugugu..."
"If you've learned your lesson, choose a better time and place for your brawls. Try not to cause trouble for other people next time."
Leaving the men with those parting words, Rest turned to head back to his table.
However, the woman who had been standing between the two men suddenly let out a shrill, theatrical cry.
"Thank youuu! You saved meee!"
"Wait, what...?"
"I was so scared! I didn't know what to do when they started bothering meee. Thank you so much!"
The woman, who looked to be in her mid-twenties and wore a dress with an excessively plunging neckline, came rushing toward Rest. She ran with her hands raised slightly and her body swaying with enough exaggeration to make her breasts bounce, clearly intending to throw herself into his arms.
"My name is Meriana, and—KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!?"
"Fireball."
Just as the woman was about to press her chest against him, a fireball streaked in from the side and struck her directly in the head.
Her hair burst into flames with a loud woosh. Panicking, she dropped to the floor and began rolling around frantically to extinguish the fire.
"That was dangerous, Rest."
"...Viola."
The one who had unleashed the flames was, of course, Viola. With an expression of pure relief, she walked over to stand by his side.
"A nasty little bug almost latched onto you. I’m just glad I caught it in time."
"............"
Rest understood her intent. An unsavory woman had tried to cling to him, so she had simply removed the threat.
(But still... do people normally just set others on fire?)
Regardless of her reasoning, it felt like a bit much. He didn't particularly care about the woman currently rolling around on the floor, but he felt a slight shiver of genuine fear.
"I have no issues with a proper secondary wife or a concubine. But I won't tolerate a common hussy! It would bring nothing but chaos to the household!"
"...I see."
Rest wondered where the line was actually drawn. Harboring that silent doubt, he leaned into Viola as they both looked down at the woman, who was now being doused with a bucket of water by a clerk.