In Lepsitol, entertainment existed to some degree.
There was sumo, and then there was sumo... and more sumo.
Was there really nothing but sumo?!
Even for the wealthy, the pinnacle of a successful life was merely drinking every day and surrounding oneself with women. Because of that lack of variety, drugs that were illegal back in Chronos were flooding the streets in massive quantities. It was a hellish landscape where middle-aged men, high out of their minds, were collapsed all over the place. In the truly dangerous districts, it was the old ladies who were the ones passed out on the ground.
It was into this environment that a certain form of entertainment was introduced from Chronos.
Pro-wrestling—that was quite well-received.
Soccer was also reasonably popular.
As for baseball, a sport that was a massive craze in the Taikyoku Nation, it proved to be a harder sell. If the locals heard they were slated to play against the Taikyoku Nation, the players would simply run away.
And that was where basketball came in.
Pure-blooded Lepsitolians were tall; a height of three meters wasn't even considered unusual. By the same token, they were slender and tended to be physically weak, much like the Latarnians. However, assimilation with other races had progressed considerably, and among the commoners, pure Lepsitolians weren't actually that numerous. There were many Latarnian-types, who could be found almost anywhere in the galaxy. Next in number were the Chronos-types, which included the Ozen and Magellan ethnicities—all of whom shared the same roots.
There were almost no Ogre God Nation types. However, since the few who were there were strong and fast, they stood a real chance in the sport.
Due to factors like these, basketball spread like wildfire.
Courts were built wherever people pleased. Crude hoops, looking like they’d just been nailed into place, appeared everywhere. Boys spent their days playing there. That was the extent of the basketball craze.
Galactic Empire basketball magazines and basketball textbooks were being translated and published as quickly as people could scramble for them. They were being reprinted one after another. Traveling to the Chronos mainland to learn Galactic Empire Style Basketball became the children's dream... and things had already become irreversible!
Furthermore, most of the Ninja People had enlisted in the Chronos Army. Once there, they joined the Army Baseball School or the basketball school that the military ran as part of its social outreach.
With things going that far, Mike & Hammer Co. couldn't just stand by and watch. Or rather, social pressure forced their hand. First, they moved to establish a basketball league. The police, the military, and relatively "white" companies all prepared to field teams.
The populace was being steeped in Galactic Empire—or rather, Chronos—culture.
Following the usual pattern, they had already completed their studies of the anime Ikkyu-san... and had even moved on to yuri anime. Ah, I see.
As a result, the preparations prior to annexation by Chronos—or rather, the delay tactics I’d employed under that name—had worked far too well.
I was filled with despair.
I sat in my usual dining hall, lamenting my fate.
And then there was Saijo-kun.
Today, Saijo-kun was dressed in a gal-style blazer. It didn't suit him very well. I couldn't help but think a more refined, "pure" style would have suited him better.
Saijo-kun had been appointed as the Lepsitol Annexation Special Envoy by Wifey's command. On the organizational chart, Saijo-kun was not my subordinate; he belonged to the Imperial Guard Knight Order, directly under the Galactic Empire Emperor. However, he was currently treated as being on secondment to Chronos. This arrangement had been handled by the civil officials of the Galactic Empire and Chronos, who had utilized every bit of sophistry and every legal loophole at their disposal to make it happen.
...I should probably send him some gifts later to make up for it.
"I'm not exactly the King of Chronos's subordinate, you know!" he complained.
"I'm sorry! But please, do it for the sake of our friendship as classmates!"
"I can't even go on dates with Yuri-san anymore!"
"You should just take Yuri with you, then," Wifey said, suddenly appearing.
"Y-Your Majesty..."
"Saijo, what does that one's family have to say about this?"
"They told me to stop trying to act clever and just live by going with the flow. They said it's a waste of time to try and predict the future of the Galactic Empire or Chronos."
"Umu. Lord Groom, what do you think?"
"Personally," I said, "it feels like I was just processing the tasks in front of me and this was the result. From an objective perspective, I suppose I look like a Conquering King who’s seizing nations and expanding territory left and right. Even though in my heart I’m thinking, 'To hell with expansionism'..."
Furthermore, I adamantly refused to let the kingdom undergo a class change into an Empire. I was perfectly fine being Wifey's bumbling Lord Groom!
"It is a strange phenomenon where hostile forces are destroyed one after another... And so, Saijo, I'm counting on you."
"A... As you command."
He seemed a bit dissatisfied. I suppose that made sense.
"And so, Lord Groom."
Wifey had an "it can't be helped" look on her face. What was with that resigned expression?
"What's wrong? You've got a strange look on your face."
"I am sorry, but please also dispatch the former volleyball club members."
So that was it. It had turned into a complaint about how it was unfair for basketball to have all the fun.
"Ah, okay. But don't we need a gymnasium?"
"Beach volleyball would also be fine."
Either way, we would need the space. Well, whatever.
"Saijo-kun, please handle the organization. Include both men and women from the former volleyball club."
I'd said "former," but their club activities were very much ongoing. If anything, they were being encouraged as a form of cultural exchange.
With that, I set the matter of Lepsitol aside for a moment. If it was Saijo-kun, I figured he wouldn't do anything unreasonable.
Or so I thought, until three days later.
"Something terrible has happened..."
I was in an emergency meeting with Wifey. Since the meeting was held in the dining hall, it didn't seem quite that dire, but still. Yuri-chan began distributing materials.
"Did something happen to your boyfriend?"
For some reason, the materials were images taken in various locations of Saijo-kun together with local Lepsitolians. Every single person in the photos looked like a beautiful woman—even though Saijo-kun was a guy.
Yuri-chan spoke without a trace of emotion. "They are all men."
"Wha?"
"They are all men."
Crossdressing. It was the most masculine act, one that only a man could truly achieve. In the Galactic Empire, reaching back to the age of myth, stories of crossdressing...
"What on earth are you spreading over there?"
"Apparently, the trigger was a crackdown on the Yakuza," Yuri-chan explained. "When the Lepsitolians saw the crossdressing, they started imitating it..."
"O-Oh..."
In other words, his raw manhood had struck a chord with the local brand of masculinity.
"This is a specialized magazine that was just published."
"A specialized magazine?!"
Saijo-kun, dressed in a traditional kimono, graced the cover.
"Wait, is Saijo-kun a country-ruining male daughter?"
"Putting aside the fact that he's a narcissist and knows he's cute, his personality is perfectly normal," Yuri-chan noted.
Narcissist... Ah, yeah, the Lepsitolians were like that too. Reciting death poems, performing seppuku... even Karen-san was constantly showing off her cleavage.
"The affinity is too high!"
I might have made the worst possible personnel decision. But even as I thought that, a part of me was already making excuses, telling myself it couldn't be helped because we were so short-staffed. I honestly couldn't think of any other plan.
"He seems to be incredibly popular locally. They're calling him a 'Yamato Nadeshiko'..."
Wifey remained silent. I guess I had to be the one to wrap this up.
"Whatever, let it be!"
I would leave it all to Saijo-kun. Even if Lepsitol ended up being populated by nothing but basketball players and male daughters, it wasn't my problem anymore.
I was giving up on a great many things.