Before this girl who seemed to want nothing more than to fade into the wind, I found myself at a loss for words.
How to describe her...
There was Hayashi, who was foolishly straightforward and stubborn.
There was Kasahara, whose thoughts were always a mystery but who possessed a will of iron.
This girl, however, was unique in a completely different way from those two.
Naturally, she had a strong will of her own. Despite the miserable hand life had dealt her, she was still trying her best to keep up with her studies at the university. That was exactly the kind of willpower I respected.
That kind of inner strength is vital.
To survive in this high-pressure society, I believe that, above all else, establishing one’s sense of self is paramount.
The willpower to tell a senior forcing drinks on you that enough is enough.
The willpower to tell a company where power harassment is the norm that you’re quitting.
The willpower to tell a colleague that they smell, even if they’re completely oblivious to their own lack of hygiene.
In the end, it all comes down to willpower.
A strong will can solve anything.
"Anyway, if joining a club is out of the question, what are we going to do?"
Dealing with her while she was in this mopey state was becoming a chore, so I tried to steer the conversation back on track.
I folded my arms and looked down, putting on a show of being deep in thought.
"...It’s fine. Just forget it."
"Hm?"
"It’s fine now. It can’t be helped, anyway. You’re a busy guy, right, Yamamoto-kun?"
It was true... but after hearing that sob story of hers, I felt a twinge of guilt about just nodding along.
"It can’t be helped. To begin with, it’s only natural. Even if I could have Yamamoto-kun teach me, I don't have anything I could give you in return."
...Well.
When you take up someone’s time, it’s only natural to feel like you have to provide some kind of compensation for the time you’ve stolen.
"I can't do anything right. I'm useless, I'm failing my classes, and I have zero friends. I'm just a total lost-cause. Ahaha."
I was on the verge of telling her to stop being so damn pathetic, but I held my tongue, knowing that saying anything would likely just lead to more trouble.
"Say something!"
I was damned if I did and damned if I didn't!
Incredible. It was like there was no escape.
Honestly, after hearing those miserable anecdotes of hers, a small part of me was starting to think it wouldn't kill me to help her with her schoolwork.
It was... you know.
I felt like showing her, even if just a little, that the world isn't entirely heartless.
I had fallen into that sort of mood.
But then... Kasahara’s face flashed through my mind. I could only imagine the look she’d give me if she found out I was tutoring someone like Takeshita.
Damn it.
Why am I sitting here worrying like a husband who’s terrified of his wife finding out about an affair?
Kasahara and I were over.
Furthermore, she had been teasing me about that very fact to no end.
So why on earth should I care what she thinks?
...That's right. Exactly.
Our relationship is finished.
Right now, we’re just... friends? Or maybe even less than that!
In that case, there’s no reason for me to be so considerate toward her, is there?
Exactly.
That's right.
"Alright," I said. "I'll teach you."
I spoke the words that would finally put an end to this exhausting conversation.
They must have been the words she had been waiting for.
For someone like Takeshita, who was drowning in her university coursework and had resorted to begging the "Solitary Hard Worker (lol)" for help.
Takeshita, however...
"But... weren't you busy?"
She was a truly difficult woman.
"I am busy. But I'll carve out some time to teach you."
Takeshita was...
"No... no. You shouldn't go that far for a pain in the neck like me."
She was an incredibly servile woman.
"You're the one who asked me, aren't you?"
Takeshita continued.
"But I have nothing to give you..."
"I'm not teaching you because I want a reward."
"Even though you're busy, you'll carve out time? For free?"
"That's right."
"If you say stuff like that, I'll just end up taking advantage of you, you know?"
"Don't start taking advantage of me just because I said that."
"...It's only human to get lazy once you've had a taste of the easy life."
"...Fine, then the whole deal is off."
"Waaaaah! Why would you say something like that!?"
"What is wrong with you?"
I'm asked to teach her, and when I say okay, she gives me a hard time.
I say I won't teach her, and she starts wailing.
What was the point of this entire conversation?
God, I just want to go home...