Once she had regained her composure, Hayashi began to eat in silence. It seemed she was finally done digging into the fact that I didn't have any friends.
"You know, I really do think it’s better to have some," she said. "Having friends you can truly be yourself around gives your life a sense of balance."
Apparently, she wasn't finished digging through my social failures just yet.
She spoke with a calm, matter-of-fact tone, as if stating a universal truth.
"Ugh."
"What? Don't tell me you don't even want friends?"
"It’s not that..." I started, stacking the finished dishes as I continued. "It's just that I don't actually know how to make them."
The sound of chopsticks hitting the floor echoed through the room. It was Hayashi.
"For real?"
"For real."
"Wow, that's rough."
"Oh, a genuine reaction. I've been living with you for a month, so I can tell when you're being serious."
"You... how have you been getting by all this time without even knowing how to make a friend?"
"That’s exactly what I'm telling you. I don’t have any."
"Oh. Right."
I didn't say it out loud since she seemed genuinely concerned, but she was being incredibly rude.
"Sorry..."
"Don't apologize so sincerely. It actually hurts my feelings."
"...I see," she murmured. "So you just don't know how to do it."
"Exactly."
"B-But, you know, being able to admit when you don't know something is a very big step! You're doing so well!"
"Stop. That’s the exact phrasing people use to praise elementary schoolers."
"Ugh..."
Hayashi looked visibly depressed. Watching her get this dejected over my situation made my lack of social skills seem so dire that it was almost funny. Wait, was I not supposed to be laughing?
"Hey, Hayashi. How do you even make friends? You’re supposed to be the expert here."
"Eh? Well... you know, if your eyes meet, you're basically friends, right?"
"Then you must have at least a hundred friends by now."
"Now that I think about it... how do you actually make friends?"
"See? How have you been making them all this time without even knowing how?"
"They just sort of happened naturally. Teehee."
"Teehee" my foot.
Did she think she could get away with anything just by acting cute? Well, that was a privilege reserved for cute girls. And Hayashi was definitely that, so I guess she could.
Dammit. In the end, is this world all about looks?
"Alright," she said firmly.
"What's 'alright,' Hayashi-san?"
"Yamamoto. Today, you are going to go talk to a guy in your department."
"What? No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes!"
"No! Why are we acting like a bunch of toddlers!?"
I couldn't help but snap back. Hayashi was incredibly strong-willed, so these kinds of exchanges happened occasionally—actually, frequently. Usually, I was the one to fold first, but given the circumstances, I couldn't back down.
"Geez, what's the big deal? I'm just telling you to go strike up a conversation and build a friendly rapport."
"Why do you assume talking to them will lead to a friendly rapport?"
"It won't?"
"No. If I talk to them, they’ll probably just be creeped out."
"I don't think that's true at all."
I thought it was rich of her to say that, considering how much she had hated me back in High School, but I decided to keep that thought to myself.
"Anyway, go talk to a guy today. I'm sure it'll turn out fine."
"No, it won't. I absolutely refuse."
"You have to. Otherwise..."
"Otherwise what?"
"I'll... I'll spread rumors at your part-time job that you and I are living together."
"Ah, well, go ahead. It’s less of a rumor and more of a fact anyway. I'll definitely be looked at strangely, but considering I'm the one looking after you, I’m in no position to complain about what people say. Besides, even if rumors spread, as long as you stay in this room... I think I'd be happy. Personally."
"Never mind then!"
"You're giving up already?"
"I am!"
She was having some serious mood swings today.
"Fine. Then I'm not making dinner anymore."
"I don't mind, but are you really okay with that?"
I knew that Hayashi handled the housework as a sort of penance. She hadn't received her first paycheck yet and was essentially living in my apartment for free.
"...No, I'm not."
"Right. You really don't need to worry about it so much, though."
"Fine... I get it. I get it."
Phew. She finally gave up. I let out a visible sigh of relief.
"I'll throw away your Cleaning Tools."
"!!??"
What?
Wait... what did she just say?
Throw away... my Cleaning Tools?
Did this woman just say she was going to throw away my precious Cleaning Tools!!??
"Ah, sorry. Maybe throwing them away is a bit much."
Oh, thank god. It was just a joke.
"I'll sell them on Mercari."
"!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!"
My heart began to hammer against my ribs louder than I had ever felt in my life.
This couldn't be happening.
No way...
My Cleaning Tools were going to be thrown out? No, worse—they were going to be sold off to strangers!?
"T-There is no way I can allow that!"
"Oh? Well, the solution is simple."
"What is?"
"Just have a little chat with a guy today."
"That's... that's just..."
"I'll give you all the money, of course. But honestly, it’s for the best. Your closet is already bursting at the seams with Cleaning Tools. You even have the exact same tools in different colors. It's about time you organized them."
"But... but...!"
"Yamamoto."
"What?"
"I know you can do it."
"Gnuuu...!"
I glared at Hayashi with everything I had. It was the kind of look a child would give to the villain who had murdered their parents.
"Fine. Fine, I'll do it! I just have to talk to someone, right?"
"Good. I'll have dinner ready and waiting for you."
"Yeah! I'm off then!"
I stormed out of the apartment, maintaining what I hoped was a dignified, haughty air.
"He chose cleaning tools over me. I can't believe him," Hayashi muttered under her breath. "I wasn't actually going to sell them, even if he failed, but... honestly, now I kind of want to."
I heard her whispering something as I walked away, but I couldn't make out the words.