Having finished up, I stepped out of the restroom and scanned the store for Hayashi.
"Ah, there she is."
I spotted her near the bookstore exit. She seemed to be deep in conversation with someone.
Then, I saw who it was. The girl Hayashi was talking to.
"...Kasahara."
As I breathed her name, our eyes met. Hayashi turned around a moment later. Her expression looked uncharacteristically grim.
"See you later, Megu."
Kasahara left without another word to either of us, disappearing into the street. I wondered what she had even come here for.
"Sorry to keep you waiting, Hayashi."
"...Yamamoto."
"Are you okay? You look pale."
Hayashi didn't offer a reply.
"My bad. I took too long."
"...Yamamoto..."
"Let’s just head home for now."
I couldn't exactly leave her standing there in that state. I took her by the hand and led her out of the bookstore.
She remained silent the entire way back. She hadn't been like this when we first walked into the shop. So, at what point had she shut down like this?
Well, I didn't have to think very hard to find the answer.
This shift in her mood had undoubtedly happened after she met Kasahara. But why? Kasahara and Hayashi were supposed to be best friends in high school—the kind that were always together.
Why was this happening?
"Hey, Yamamoto."
We were nearing the house when Hayashi finally spoke, her hand still resting in mine as I led her along. Her voice was usually either listless or overbearing, but now, it sounded completely hollow.
"...Were you dating Akari?"
My feet came to a sudden halt.
My relationship with Kasahara.
On the way back from our visit to Kasahara’s house, Hayashi had sensed I was hiding something about her, and I had admitted as much. But back then, I had kept one detail to myself.
No, if I were to make an excuse, it wasn't that I was intentionally hiding it. I just couldn't find the right time to say it. And to be more precise... on the day my relationship with Kasahara ended, the fact that she dumped me was the absolute, undeniable truth.
I didn't try to offer an explanation now because I knew those weren't the words Hayashi was looking for.
"I was," I said bluntly.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I'm sorry. I have no excuse."
"...It's not like you need an excuse anyway."
The words began to spill out of her like a burst dam.
"You and I aren't lovers or anything. It's not like you have any reason to apologize to me."
"...But you and Kasahara were best friends, weren't you?"
"That's..."
"You heard it from her, didn't you? About us. I'm sorry. I should have been the one to tell you back then. Because I didn't, you ended up distrusting her."
Back in high school, those two were inseparable. They had finally reunited after Hayashi was freed from her ex-boyfriend. But I knew the truth. Ever since the day we went to Kasahara’s house, Hayashi hadn't made any attempt to see her again.
I had asked her about it several times. I'd ask if she was going to see Kasahara, or if it was actually fun spending all her time with a guy like me instead of her best friend.
Every time I brought it up, Hayashi would make a complicated face and give me a vague non-answer.
Seeing that, it was impossible not to notice.
It was obvious that she was avoiding Kasahara.
"I'm sorry. It must have been revolting to find out that Kasahara was actually involved with someone like me—someone you loathe. You probably feel disgusted, don't you?"
"That's not it!"
"...I can't imagine what else it would be."
Hayashi didn't argue further.
"But don't worry. It was a perfectly normal relationship. And more importantly, it’s long over."
"...You said it before, didn't you?"
"Said what?"
"That you still have lingering feelings for Akari."
"That's not your burden to carry. Don't worry about it."
"I'm not worried! It's just...!"
It's just... Hayashi trailed off, leaving the sentence hanging.
"...When were you two dating?"
"Me and her?"
"Who else?"
"Fair point."
I gave a weak, wry smile and started walking again. Hayashi looked dejected, but she followed my lead.
A heavy silence fell between us.
I agonized over it privately, trying to pinpoint exactly when we had started dating. Recalling those days was... difficult. It hurt.
The usual Hayashi would have noticed exactly how I was feeling right now.
But today, she was the one pressing for the painful truth. She was probably just as shaken as I was. It was only natural. The sense of disgust she felt toward me right now had to be immense.
In that case, things couldn't possibly get any worse.
My own discomfort didn't matter at a time like this. I didn't want to stoke any more anxiety in Hayashi, especially now when she was finally starting to get back on her feet.
"...From the summer of our senior year. I think it was right after the school festival," I told her. "We were together for about three months. It felt like it was over in the blink of an eye."
I closed my eyes for a moment.
As soon as I did, the memories of those days began to resurface.
Memories I didn't want to touch.
Memories I wanted to cherish.
A flood of different moments came rushing back to life...