I climbed the elegant staircase and stopped before a pair of lavishly decorated double doors. Er... the party venue was just beyond here. I was actually starting to get a little nervous.
For one thing, these doors were impossibly huge. How was I even supposed to open them? Did I just knock?
I stood there, feeling dwarfed by the massive doors—there was no way my feeble strength was going to budge them—but then Alice casually stepped in front of me and swung them open. She did it effortlessly.
The interior was... wait, what? Dark?
"Now then, Kaito-san, please go inside."
"Oh, okay."
Was this one of those "surprise" things? Even for a birthday, it seemed a bit much. It wasn't just dimly lit; it was pitch-black. I couldn't see an inch in front of my face.
It definitely wasn't a natural phenomenon; some kind of magical effect was keeping the room in darkness. As soon as I stepped inside, Alice pulled the doors shut behind me.
"Ready... set!"
"Happy Birthday, Kaito-kun!" "Happy Birthday, Kaito-san!"
Kuro’s voice rang out through the dark, followed immediately by a sudden flood of light. Cheers and blessings erupted from every direction, punctuated by the sharp crack of party poppers.
A beautifully decorated hall, tables groaning under the weight of gourmet food, and a massive crowd of people... Even though I knew it was coming, I was still stunned. It was hard to put my feelings into words.
As Alice had promised, the room was filled with familiar faces. Still, there were a lot of them.
To think all these people had gathered on such short notice just to celebrate my birthday... Of course I was happy, but more than that, it was a strange, ticklish sort of feeling.
"Now, Kaito-san... please, take your place on the stage."
"...The stage?"
"Right over there."
"Wait... what?"
I followed Alice's pointing finger toward the seat of honor—a section of the floor that had been raised a step higher than the rest.
Wait, that was my spot? No way. You’ve got to be kidding. That’s the kind of place where kings sit. Was I really supposed to go up there?
No, no, no. This was a bad idea. All the kings of the Human Realm, the Six Kings, and even Shiro-san were standing down here on the regular floor. If I were the only one perched up on a pedestal, the scene would look completely ridiculous. Forget being disrespectful—this was just absurd.
"N-No, I'd really rather just stay down here with everyone else..."
"I figured you’d say that! But request denied!"
"Wait—! Alice!?"
Resistance was futile. Alice hoisted me up and moved me onto the stage in the blink of an eye before hopping back down to the floor.
This was a nightmare. Looking down on such an illustrious lineup of people was bad for my heart. Though, wait... even from the stage, I still wasn't technically looking down at Megiddo-san.
No, that wasn't the point! What was I supposed to do now? Everyone's eyes were fixed on me. What was I expected to do!?
"Everyone! Thanks for coming today! It's Kaito-kun’s birthday, after all. Let’s celebrate big, make some noise, and have a great time!"
Cold sweat rolled down my back as Kuro climbed onto the stage holding a magic tool that looked like a microphone. She began her speech with a radiant smile.
Oh, thank god. Kuro was taking charge of the proceedings. What a relief. A massive relief.
"And now, we’ll have a Short Speech and a Toast from the star of the show himself—Kaito-kun!"
"!!??"
The worst possible hand-off had arrived! A speech and a toast!? No, no, no—that was way too high a bar for a former loner like me!
Just standing here was making me want to crawl into a hole, but Kuro was already thrusting the microphone toward me. Everyone was waiting in expectant silence. There was no getting out of this.
I took the mic from Kuro with trembling hands and scanned the room. The leaders of entire worlds were lined up below the stage, watching me with serious expressions... wait, hey, Luna-san! Why do you look so incredibly amused? You're clearly struggling to hold back a laugh! Seriously, that woman...
"...Um, honestly, I'm not really sure what to say. But thank you all so much for coming today, especially since this was all so sudden."
Whatever, I just had to dive in. I'd have to wing it. Except... damn, I couldn't think of anything. My mind was a blank. "I'm happy" and "Thank you" were the only words coming to mind.
In fact, I felt like I'd already said everything I needed to. I didn't know how to keep going. What do I do? What do I do!?
"Now that I think about it, it’s only been six months since I first arrived in this world. It might seem like a short time."
Suddenly, the words began to flow. Unlike a moment ago, I found myself staring straight ahead, speaking clearly and without hesitation.
"But within that short time, I've met so many people and formed so many bonds. I feel truly happy from the bottom of my heart."
The reason I’d managed to regain my composure so quickly was simple: Alice was standing at the very back of the hall, holding up a Giant Cue Card where only I could see it.
Alice! What a perfect save! I always knew I could count on you when the chips were down!
Alice kept holding up the cards, helping me flesh out the speech, until she finally gave me a sharp wink. I guess the closing was supposed to be in my own words. Fine—if she’d helped me this much, I could handle the finish.
"...I hope that we can all continue to laugh together and live happily like this from here on out. It’s brief, but I’d like to end my greeting by expressing my sincere gratitude to all of you."
Thanks to Alice’s incredible assist, I managed to wrap up the speech.
As I finished, a glass suddenly materialized in my hand—the unmistakable handiwork of the Perfect Maid.
"...Once again, thank you all for being here today! Cheers!"
I raised the glass high, and everyone followed suit, their voices rising in a unified shout of "Cheers!" With that, my birthday party officially began.
Dear Mother, Father—
Well, I have plenty of complaints, but Alice really delivered this time. It was a spectacular play on her part. Yeah... I think I'll forget about scolding her for the Seesaw Incident.