By the time we had made our way through various stalls, it was already noon.
Though we had been hitting the attractions, we had spent the morning snacking as we walked, so I wasn't actually that hungry. With that in mind, I thought we should keep lunch light and headed toward the restaurant district with Kuro.
Because the Six Kings Festival attracted so many nobles, there was an area dedicated to high-end dining, even during the summer-festival atmosphere of the sixth day.
"What should we eat?" I asked.
"Hmm, it’s so hard to choose~"
Kuro and I held hands as we weighed our options. She was looking around indecisively, but her gaze suddenly locked onto a single spot. I saw her eyes ignite with a dazzling sparkle. Tentatively, I followed her gaze—only to find a signpost pointing straight to hell: "Baby Castella Specialty Restaurant."
Hold on. Please, just give me a second to breathe... The phrase "Baby Castella Dishes" is such a bizarre combination of words that my brain is refusing to process it. I mean, what even are Baby Castella Dishes?! The snack is already a complete dish in its own right! Why would you try to refine it further? It’s crazy, absolutely crazy...
"Kaito-kun! Over there! Let's go there!"
"..."
No, no, I’ve already been pummeled by enough baby castellas today. Going there now would be the finishing move. Even for me, this is...
"It’s amazing! I’m getting so excited! I wonder what kind of food they’ll serve?"
"U-Um..."
"I’m so looking forward to it—eating Baby Castella Dishes with Kaito-kun~"
"...F-Fine, let’s go."
"Yay!"
It was no use. I couldn't win. I couldn't bring myself to hurt Kuro when she was looking at me with those shimmering eyes. I wanted to protect that radiant smile... even if it meant sacrificing my own stomach to the cause.
The interior of the restaurant was, for all intents and purposes, perfectly normal. Of course, since Kuro was with me, we were immediately ushered into a VIP Seat—a private room. Despite the luxury, I felt nothing but mounting dread.
As for the food, Kuro energetically declared "Everything!", so we left the order of the dishes up to the chef. I planned to just pick at whatever looked edible.
The first dish arrived.
"The Baby Castella Gratin, for your enjoyment."
"Ohh!"
"..."
Okay, deep breath. Let me calm my heart.
Wait, wasn't this the part where the "disgusting food" was supposed to appear? Why were they serving something that actually looked halfway decent? More to the point, they’d just thrown baby castellas into a gratin. I saw absolutely no reason for them to be in there!
"Kaito-kun?"
"N-No, it’s nothing... They’re going to keep bringing them out, so let’s just eat."
"Okay!"
Playing the straight man in my head, I took a bite of the so-called Baby Castella Gratin. It tasted like... a normal gratin. I felt strangely deflated, like I’d been set up for a joke that never landed. In the meantime, the second dish arrived.
"This is the Baby Castella Lasagna."
"Ohhh!"
"..."
Honestly, someone call the Chef. Why serve lasagna right after gratin? They’re basically the same thing! Ugh, maybe they were serving the similar dishes first? Did that mean a Baby Castella Doria was next? Well, at least it was simpler than I’d expected.
"This is the Baby Castella Terrine with Truffles, Boeuf Salé, Ris de Veau, and Sky Beans Gâteau-style."
"Wow, it looks delicious!"
"..."
Where did this nonsensical French name suddenly come from?! What happened to the flow from before? A Baby Castella Terrine is clearly just someone messing around! What kind of expression did the chef have when he decided to turn baby castellas into a terrine? And why serve it with beef? No matter how you looked at it, those flavors weren't going to mesh!
"And this is the Rock Salt Grilled Baby Castella."
"Amazing! I didn't know you could cook them like this!!"
"..."
They’re baked to begin with! Why on earth would you need to encase them in rock salt? Just sprinkle some salt on them and be done with it! And what was with Kuro? She was giving every single dish a rave review!
"This is the Baby Castella Pasta."
"Hmm, I see. I never would have thought of that. I’ll have to try this myself sometime."
"..."
Please don't. We don't need that devilish inspiration! You’re just throwing baby castellas into pasta!
"This is the main course, the Mega Baby Castella."
"Ohhh! It’s huge!!"
"..."
You’re really going to insist that this massive object is still a "baby" castella? Just how many normal ones went into this thing? It was gargantuan. And Kuro, who polished it off in the blink of an eye, was even more terrifying.
"This is the Castella to cleanse your palate."
"It’s sweet and delicious."
"..."
Why did you give up at the very end?! After insisting the previous one was a baby castella, how can you serve a normal Castella with a straight face?! And a palate cleanser for baby castella being... more castella? That doesn't cleanse anything! It’s a one-way ticket to heartburn!
Dear Mother, Father—beyond the depths of Baby Castella Hell lay an even deeper circle of Baby Castella Hell. To be honest... I hate this restaurant already.
??? (Browsing Otherworld Net): "...There are surprisingly many sensible opinions here. As for the person saying 'Kaito-san needs to explode,' I’ll hit them with a 'Curse to Stub One's Little Toe' later... But at this rate, I might actually find a decent baby castella..."
Me-o: "Okay... Shark fin in a fried bun, Wyvern Meat Hamburg Steak and Takoyaki soaked in syrup inside extra-spicy Mapo Tofu, topped with crab omelet, melty cheese, scorched Soy Sauce, and shredded seaweed, then wrapped in cocoa gummies with cranberry sauce and Spiritas Ice Cream, and finally... Yokan, Nozawana, and mochi wrapped inside Raw Baby Castella... Done! This is the Ultimate Baby Castella!"
???: "W-h-y a-r-e y-o-u m-i-x-i-n-g t-h-e-m?!"