The time for our delicious meal ended in the blink of an eye, and Luna-san spoke up just as the last plate was cleared.
"The head chef apparently wishes to stop by and greet us, Miyama-sama. I’ll leave the socializing to you."
"Eh? Wait, no... I’d really appreciate it if you could back me up here..."
"Unfortunately, Milady—who would normally be the most accustomed to such formalities—is currently... in this state."
"……Kyuuu~"
As it turned out, Lilia-san still hadn't come to. Seriously, this had to be a new record.
Because of her faint, Lilia-san had only managed to finish about half of her meal. Fortunately, Luna-san had spoken with the staff and arranged for the rest to be packed into a Magic Box so she could take it home later.
"Well, putting Kaito-senpai aside for a second, Magic Boxes really are a lifesaver in situations like this," Aoi remarked.
"I couldn't care less about Kaito-san, but I'm impressed a high-end place like this actually allowed takeout," Hina added.
"Dropping Miyama-sama’s name did the trick instantly," Luna replied.
"Hey... stop doing things behind my back."
My two juniors didn't seem even remotely concerned about my plight. Was this a sign of trust? Yeah, it had to be trust, right?
"Oh, don't worry," Luna continued. "I made sure to inform them that Miyama-sama would be happy to provide feedback on the meal on behalf of our group."
"……"
Luna-san, what did I ever do to you? I might be acquainted with some powerful people, but I’m still just an ordinary guy at heart.
Besides, my favorite Chinese dish is just simple fried rice...
As I sat there lamenting my fate, a verbal volley came flying at Luna-san from an unexpected direction.
"My, my. Ru-chan really does love Miyama-san, doesn't she?"
"M-Mother?! What are you saying all of a sudden?! Where in the world did you get that idea from—"
"Oh? Well, ever since you were little, Ru-chan, you’ve always had a habit of playing pranks on the people you like. You just want him to pay attention to you, don't you?"
"Uwaaaaah?! Stop talking nonsense! That’s not it! You’re absolutely, 100% wrong!"
Luna-san’s greatest weakness—her natural enemy, in a sense—was her own mother. At Noah-san's words, Luna-san began frantically shaking her head in denial.
I was certainly curious about Lunamaria-san's true feelings, but something else took priority: When on earth had Noah-san moved her chair right next to mine?
"Noah-san, why are you sitting next to me?"
"Is it... not allowed?"
"N-No, that's not it!"
Please stop... stop looking up at me with that mature, bewitching gaze.
Her cheeks were flushed, likely from the wine, and her dress boldly exposed her shoulders. Despite her petite frame, she radiated the kind of dizzying sex appeal you'd expect from a widow.
Wait, hold on. Why was she wrapping her arms around mine and leaning her weight against me?
"M-Mother?! What are you doing?!"
"I’m afraid I’ve become a bit tipsy..."
"Then why did you drink?! You know you have zero tolerance for alcohol!"
"Ah, perhaps... it wasn't the wine. Perhaps I’ve become intoxicated by Miyama-san instead."
"Mother, please. Listen to me for once."
Noah-san ignored her daughter, gently hugging my arm and rubbing her cheek against my sleeve. Please stop. I—or rather, any healthy man on the planet—is defenseless against this sort of thing.
"Miyama-san, tonight was truly lovely."
"E-Er, yes. It was."
"But the more fun one has, the lonelier the end feels. I’m sure tonight will be a long, cold night of solitude."
"T-That might be true..."
"Hah... on a night like that, to be warmed by a wonderful man like you... as a woman, I don't think I could ask for anything more."
"Wh-?!"
Noah-san was definitely drunk. She gazed at me with bleary, hooded eyes and let out a soft, sultry sigh. Even her breath felt incredibly provocative. So this was the power of a mature woman...
Her suggestions were getting dangerously bold. And she was tracing her fingers along my arm—please, seriously, stop that.
As my heart hammered against my ribs, Noah-san leaned in close to my ear, as if she knew exactly what she was doing to me. Her voice was thick with heat.
"……What do you say? If you're willing... would you like to grab another drink with me afterward? Just the two of us."
"—?!"
"Mother!! No! I absolutely will not allow it! Get away from Miyama-sama this instant!"
I stood there, shivering from the unfamiliar sensation of her breath against my ear, until Luna-san finally rushed over to pull her mother away.
"Ru-chan? Ah, I see... you want to join us too, don't you?"
"Wh-What are you talking about, you drunkard?! That's it, we’re going back to the inn right now!"
"There’s no need to be shy. Since it's your first time, Ru-chan, Mother will teach you everything you need to know."
"Agh, good grief!"
Noah-san refused to let go of my arm, and Luna-san tried to wedge herself between us to pry her mother loose.
I’d been feeling various blissful sensations against my right arm for several minutes now. Someone, please, save me...
"Well, let's leave those two to Kaito-san and wait for Lilia-san to wake up while we chat," Sylphia suggested.
"I agree," Aoi said.
"……Goodness, Miyama-kun certainly has a way with people," Rei remarked.
Fia chimed in. "Rei, why don't you follow Miyama-kun's lead? Maybe you should find one or two more wives yourself."
"Hmm, well, I suppose I could consider it down the line."
Aoi-chan, Hina-chan, Rei-san, and even Fia-san... No, wait, Sieg-san and Anima were still—
"Oh? Come to think of it, where is Sieg?"
"Ah, she went to handle the bill since Lilia-chan is out of commission. Anima-chan also had some business to attend to, so she stepped out with Eta-chan and Theta-chan."
I had no allies left.
Dear Mother, Father—troublesome drunks exist everywhere, and Noah-san was proving to be a particularly dangerous variety. The way she pressed in with that full-throttle widow’s charm was overwhelming. Please, send someone to rescue me from this situation... Or rather—wake up already, Lilia-san!
Serious-senpai Act 3 (Taking Damage Over Time): "A drunk widow... the very phrase has a certain weight to it... yeah, I know, I know. It’s serious starting next chapter, right? Since it’s definitely serious next time, this level of nonsense is n-n-n-no problem at all..."