My name was Belbark. Belbark Lousouth. I was an old demon living in the Demon Kingdom, and at that moment, I was facing a dire crisis. I desperately wanted someone to save me.
I had exactly one regret. I should have simply reported that I was returning to my territory, but instead, I decided to hide my identity and sneak into the Royal Castle to surprise the Demon King. I had acted suspiciously, yes, but I wanted people to understand—it was meant as an expression of affection.
I had envisioned the following scene:
I would slip into the Demon King’s castle, concealing my presence, and tap the Demon King on the shoulder while he was in the middle of his administrative work. He would be startled. However, since I had only tapped his shoulder rather than attacking, the Demon King would judge that I bore no ill will and refrain from striking back. He would likely demand to know who I was.
That was when I would reveal my identity and offer a single piece of advice.
"You are still far too green..."
"Oh, it was you, Lord Belbark? Please, do not startle me like that."
"Hahaha, my apologies. But even within the Royal Castle, you must never let your guard down."
"You... you are right. I may have grown lax."
"Indeed. Furthermore, despite hiding my identity, I managed to reach this room without a single person challenging me."
"I will review our security measures immediately."
"You should do so. Well then, I shall return to my territory. Fare thee well."
Having said my piece, I would vanish gallantly before he could even reply.
In my estimation, the Demon King’s castle had grown soft. Their vigilance was weak. One must always be prepared to handle an assault at any moment, yet that mindset was utterly absent. There were two causes for this. First, they had been away from war for far too long. They had held a mock battle during the parade, but that was more of a public relations stunt for the Demon King; it did little to tighten the discipline of the castle guards.
The second cause was the Demon King’s own strength. Because they had such a powerful ruler, a collective consciousness had taken hold that they only needed to follow his lead. This was a dangerous state of affairs. Someone had to point it out.
However, there were very few people capable of telling the supreme authority of the Demon Kingdom that his own strength was causing his subordinates to slack off. This was especially true given how formidable he was. The man who had allegedly brought that strong Demon King into his service—and those in that man’s inner circle—did not seem like the types to nag the Demon King. If they were, the castle wouldn't have been this lax in the first place. Therefore, as an elder, I would be the one to speak up. This, I told myself, was truly an act of love.
Unfortunately, reality was not so kind.
the moment I snuck into the Royal Castle, a daughter of the God-kin spotted me and began a relentless pursuit. She was young; had we fought, I could have won. However, the parents standing behind her were terrifying. Thus, I fled. I escaped the castle and vanished into the streets of the Royal Capital. Although I was unfamiliar with the city, I had prepared several escape routes in advance. I judged that I could get away.
I was wrong.
The Royal Capital was that girl’s territory. She used the citizens to corner me, and even the Demon Kingdom Army cooperated with her. Honestly, wasn't a dragnet of this scale a bit much? I wasn't a criminal—well, I suppose sneaking into the Royal Castle might technically count. And to the soldiers chasing me: why were you more spirited than the ones actually stationed at the castle?
Were they part of the Academy staff? No, they were direct subordinates of General Gratz, the Strategist of the House of Buritoa. I had heard rumors of him—that he was brilliant as long as he stayed in the rear. I see; that meant he possessed commanders and troops capable enough to be entrusted with the front lines. In other words, the beastman boys named Gol, Sil, and Bron who were leading the hunt for me were exceptional. They were doing quite well for their age.
And please, stop with the casting nets. I have trauma associated with those.
In the end, I was captured. Hmph, that goat-headed goat-user was quite a piece of work. To manipulate goats so skillfully just to catch me... Though I must admit, his mimicry of a goat was magnificent. I was so startled that I unintentionally leaped into the air.
Wait... that impressive goat head. Could he be a relative of Daseki of Baphomet? Daseki... how nostalgic. That fellow loved roasting meat outdoors. He did it almost every day. It caused so many fires that he ended up with a bounty on his head in both the Demon Kingdom and the Human Kingdoms. I wondered if he was still doing well.
Actually, no. I attended his funeral. My mistake. I needed to stop escaping from reality.
I was currently being subjected to a persuasion attempt by the daughter of the God-kin in a room of a house within the Noble Academy. She wanted me to participate in a project to revitalize the nation under the Demon King’s guidance.
"It's not nation-restoration; it's nation building, or rather, town building," she corrected.
Apparently, since she wasn't becoming a queen, "restoration" wasn't the right word. She explained that "town building to establish the formal structure of a nation" was the more accurate term. And she wanted me—this me—to take part in it. Naturally, she wasn't asking for physical labor. She wanted my wisdom and my network of connections. There would be a reward, and I doubted she was lying, especially since the Demon King himself was sitting right there.
I looked at him. Demon King, do you have any intention of helping me?
"Please give up," he said. "It's too late."
I had heard this girl was the daughter of that man. Was that why he wouldn't help?
"No, it's simply because I would be genuinely happy to have your cooperation, Lord Belbark."
I gritted my teeth.
"However, I won't force you," the Demon King continued. "If you can make Lady Tiselle give up, I'll help you return to your territory."
He had said it. It was true that I felt a certain inadequacy when dealing with the God-kin, but the girl before me was still just a child. She lacked cunning. She lacked magic power. And most importantly, she lacked martial prowess. I had been holding back because I didn't want to cause a massive scene, but if the Demon King promised not to interfere, I could handle this. As agreed, I would have him help me get home.
"Ah, but violence is strictly forbidden," the Demon King added, glancing at the ceiling. "Please keep this strictly to a conversation if possible."
I followed his gaze to the ceiling.
There were several Demon Spiders up there. Quite a few of them, in fact.
"They didn't participate in the parade, but Lady Tiselle’s family home is full of Illegal Demon Spiders, you know."
Weren't those supposed to be legendary creatures?
"The clothes Lady Tiselle is wearing right now are made from Illegal Demon Spider silk."
I reconsidered. Violence was indeed a poor choice. We had to talk this out.
But wait. I hadn't lived this long for nothing. I would show her that I could play even a daughter of the God-kin like a fiddle.
"Young lady, listen to me," I began.
"Are you in the mood to help now?"
"Yes, but only if you can clear the trials I set for you!"
"Trials?"
"Yes, trials. A specialty of your kind, isn't it?"
A smirk pulled at the corners of my mouth. The God-kin were masters of imposing impossible demands under the guise of "trials" and then forcing their way through them. They even had the audacity to call themselves skilled negotiators for it. However, because of that reputation, they couldn't refuse when a trial was proposed to them. No, they wouldn't refuse. This was the proper way to handle her sort.
"Trials are fine," she said, "but obviously, impossible things are off-limits. I won't do things like 'become younger' or 'wait a thousand years.'"
"Of course. I am not a God-kin; I would never issue such nonsense."
"And the scope... I'd like you to keep it within reason. Having to go to the other side of the world would be too much."
"Very well. I shall limit it to things possible in locations connected to the Royal Capital via teleportation gates."
"Decide the number of trials clearly, too. No adding more later."
"Hmph. There shall be five! You must bring five specific items to this very room."
"Nothing like 'it’s too heavy to carry,' right?"
"Only your kind would say such a thing. I shall not. Even an ordinary person could carry these."
"Understood. Let's hear them."
In truth, I hadn't prepared these in advance. They were entirely improvised. However, since arriving in the Royal Capital, there were several things I had been unable to obtain despite my best efforts. There were exactly five of them.
"Listen well! One: The ramen from the Phantom Stall that appears in Village Five, which I could never find no matter how hard I searched!
One: Sweets from the shop called Kuro and Yuki, which are so popular you can't even get in without lining up since dawn!
One: The manju from the shop called Korin Sweets Shop, which I've never heard of taking custom orders!
One: The curry from the shop called Maruura, which delivers but absolutely forbids takeout! I want a large serving of the spicy version!
And one: The coffee from the shop where maids serve, which is the only drink in this capital I have acknowledged as worthy!
Bring all of these here within fifteen days."
I felt quite intellectual for casually slipping in a time limit. Without one, there was always a chance of success, but fifteen days would be impossible. The Phantom Stall appeared only when it felt like it. The ordering windows for Korin Sweets Shop were irregular and infrequent. And demanding they be brought to this room was the ultimate hurdle. Kuro and Yuki and Maruura refused takeout regardless of the request. The shop where maids serve was the same; they didn't allow anything to leave the premises.
Well, it wasn't strictly impossible. I had noticed that Kuro and Yuki allowed regular customers to take items home. Maruura’s food could be taken out within the Big Roof Shashato facility or to the nearby academy and inns, though they generally discouraged it to ensure the food didn't spoil and cause illness. They only allowed it for those they trusted implicitly. As for the maid shop... perhaps they feared that without the maids, their main draw would be lost. I had heard rumors they delivered to certain noble mansions, so if there were maids present, they might permit it.
Regardless, money would not move the other four shops. I knew this because I had failed even after offering mountains of gold. It required persuasion and cooperation, which, within a fifteen-day window... Hehehe.
"Um, Lord Belbark..."
"Oho, Demon King. You must not offer her any help. With your authority, it would be possible, but otherwise, it is a pipe dream! Completely impossible! Fuhahahahahaha!"
Ten days later.
All five items were laid out before me.
Along with the daughter of the God-kin’s parents.