The 4th of the Month of Light. Following my sudden abduction and a whirlwind five-day stay—four nights, to be exact—in the Hydra Kingdom, I finally made it back to the familiar mansion.
Fate-san, Shia-san, and Heart-san had to report back to the God Realm—specifically to Chronoa-san—so we parted ways in the Hydra Kingdom. Fate-san had insisted on escorting me all the way back to the mansion, but it was painfully obvious she was just looking for an excuse to dodge Chronoa-san’s tedious debriefing. I turned her down and made my own way back using Teleportation Magic.
Upon my return, I headed straight to the office to report to Lilia-san. Inside, I found the usual trio: Lilia-san, Lunamaria-san, and Sieg-san.
"Welcome back, Kaito-san. How was your time in the Hydra Kingdom?"
"It had its moments, but I enjoyed it. Oh, here are some souvenirs."
Heart-san must have kept them updated, as Lilia-san already knew I was safe. She welcomed me with a gentle, relieved smile. We exchanged some light pleasantries while I handed out the gifts, but after a moment, Lilia-san’s expression turned solemn. She spoke with a heavy, serious tone.
"So... you encountered the Hydra King as well, I assume?"
"Huh? No, I didn't."
"...Excuse me?"
Why was she acting like meeting the ruler of a nation was a mandatory part of my itinerary? I mean, considering my track record, I couldn't exactly blame her for the assumption, but still. Come to think of it, I really didn't have that kind of encounter this time around.
I had met Shia-san, a high-ranking deity from the God Realm, but as for an official from the Hydra Kingdom... wait. Could that old man have been the King?
"...Lilia-san, is His Majesty the King of the Hydra Kingdom an elderly man?"
"Eh? No, the ruler is a petite woman of the Mermaid Race. Granted, since mermaids are a long-lived species, her actual age is quite advanced..."
"Then I definitely didn't meet her."
So the King was a mermaid girl? Yeah, I definitely hadn't seen anyone like that. This time, I was truly in the clear.
"I-Is that the truth?"
"Yeah. I saw plenty of mermaids in the city, but I never spoke to them. I didn't see anyone who gave off a 'King' vibe."
"..."
When I gave her my honest answer, Lilia-san froze, her eyes wide with shock. She stared at me with a pensive, almost worried expression before slowly turning her gaze to the others.
"Luna!"
"On it... 'Pulse is normal.'"
"Sieg!"
"Hmm... no fever, either."
"Hey, wait a minute..."
At Lilia-san's command, Lunamaria-san snatched my wrist to check my pulse, while Sieg-san pressed her palm against my forehead. Hearing their reports, Lilia-san turned pale, looking as though she’d just witnessed something terrifying.
"This can't be... Kaito-san wandered a foreign city alone and didn't become acquainted with a single power player? That’s... that’s impossible!"
"Milady, I'm inclined to agree," Lunamaria added. "We should probably summon a physician from the Royal Palace immediately."
"B-Both of you, please calm down! You're being far too dramatic," Sieg-san interjected. "Though Kaito-san might have some lingering fatigue from the trip, it's probably best if he rests quietly for a while so we can keep an eye on him."
What on earth was this? Why was it an "abnormal situation" just because I didn't meet the Hydra King? This was ridiculous. I seriously wanted to sit them down for an hour and grill them on exactly what kind of person they thought I was.
"Kaito-san, perhaps you should retire for the day? The exhaustion might be worse than you realize. I'll have some nutritious meals sent to your room, so please, just rest..."
"No, no, Lilia-san! There's nothing wrong with me! Please, don't look at me with such genuine concern!"
"But..."
In their minds, the fact that I hadn't met the Hydra King was an undeniable symptom of failing health. Lilia-san, in particular, looked genuinely distressed as she fretted over me.
It was the worst kind of concern—the kind born of sincere worry, which made it impossible to get angry. How was I supposed to fix this? Oh, wait!
"Um, Lilia-san. I didn't meet the Hydra King, but I did meet a High God. The Goddess of Calamity."
"...Huh?"
"Yeah. I became acquainted with the Goddess of Calamity-sama."
"..."
It was true. I hadn't met the King, but I'd met Shia-san, the fifth-ranked deity in the God Realm. Whether we were "friends" was up for debate, but we were definitely acquaintances.
Lilia-san fell silent for a long moment before letting out a sigh of relief that seemed to come from her very soul.
"Oh... thank goodness. It's the usual Kaito-san after all."
"..."
"Indeed," Lunamaria chimed in. "Miyama-sama simply has to be like this. For a moment, I feared you were a shapeshifting imposter."
"Hey, you... you no-good maid..."
"E-Err, regardless, I'm just glad Kaito-san is healthy," Sieg-san said. "And Luna, that was rude."
"Thank you, Sieg-san."
Truly, Sieg-san was my only ally. She was the only one who consistently worried about my actual health, serving as a purifying presence in this bizarrely hostile atmosphere.
"My, I'm just so happy Miyama-sama is his usual self," Lunamaria continued, looking far too pleased with herself. "I was worried you were falling ill... or perhaps being your usual self is the illness. What do you think, Milady?"
"I-I wouldn't go that far..."
"Goodness, as expected of Miyama-sama! Demons, Gods, Humans—your ability to seduce everyone you meet never fails to impress. A popular man truly is on another level. I wonder who you'll hook next? Someone from another world, perhaps?"
"..."
The no-good maid was practically beaming, like a fish back in water. Would it be wrong to punch her? No, she’d just dodge it anyway.
I glared at Lunamaria-san as she wore that mocking smile, ready to snap back—but before I could say a word, a sharp fist buried itself in her solar plexus.
"Gah!?"
"That's quite enough, Luna. If you tease Kaito-san any further, I won't be so lenient."
"S-Sieg-san!"
Sieg-san, delivering the hammer of justice to the devil herself, looked exactly like an angel. I felt myself falling for her all over again.
"N-No, I wasn't really teasing him! It was just a bit of playfulness—! Ah, no, that's a lie! I'm sorry! I'm sorry, so please don't reach for your sword!"
"Lili, I'm borrowing Luna for a bit," Sieg-san said calmly. "It's time for a lecture."
"By all means," Lilia-san replied. "And don't hold back."
"Milady!?"
Seeing that Lunamaria-san hadn't learned her lesson and was still trying to talk her way out of it, Sieg-san’s patience finally snapped. With Lilia-san’s blessing, she grabbed the maid by the scruff of the neck and dragged her out of the room. I almost heard a funeral march playing in the background. Well, she got exactly what she deserved.
"Kaito-san, I apologize for losing my composure earlier."
"No, it's fine. It just goes to show how much trouble I usually cause you."
"Fufu. Still, I agree with Sieg. More than anything, I'm just glad you're back safe and sound. So, once again... welcome home, Kaito-san."
"Yeah. I'm home."
After apologizing for her outburst, Lilia-san gave me a warm, gentle smile. There was such a deep sense of peace in that expression, a comfort that made me feel truly at ease.
Dear Mother, Father—things were a bit hectic as usual, but I really do feel like I belong here. Lilia-san welcomed me back with such a kind smile that the words came to me naturally. For the first time, I felt like I could truly say "I'm home."