A baseball match was being held at the Village Five grounds between the Tiger Demon King’s Army, led by the Demon King himself, and the Village Five Iron Bull Army, led by Kinesta.
The game was a real see-saw match, with the lead constantly changing hands. It was an impressive display of skill, ending in a come-from-behind victory for the Village Five Iron Bull Army with a final score of nine to eight.
Naturally, a celebratory social gathering followed. It was a rowdy banquet filled with grilled meat and drinks at Sake & Meat Niz.
“To the great efforts of both teams... Cheers!”
The Demon King gulped down cold beer poured into a thick glass that had been pre-chilled using magic.
Meanwhile, in a corner of Village Five’s Ramen Street...
“One salt ramen, extra noodles, extra chashu, a touch more green onions, and no menma.”
“Got it! One salt ramen, extra noodles, extra chashu, slight onion boost, hold the menma!”
“Wait, why are you leaving out the pickled bamboo shoots? I’ll have the salt ramen, extra noodles, standard chashu, standard onions, and extra menma!”
“Coming right up! One salt ramen, extra noodles, extra menma!”
Before long, two bowls of salt ramen were placed before the two noble girls.
“First, the soup... yes. And now the noodles... quite good.”
“You always look so serious when you eat. Isn’t the point of ramen to just scarf it down without overthinking things?”
“I’m not dismissing that approach. It’s just that I have to write a review after this.”
“If you’re writing a review, doesn’t it make even less sense to leave out the menma? Do you dislike them? I thought you usually ate them just fine.”
“The specific requirements for this review required me to omit the bamboo shoots.”
“You really should be more selective about the work you take on. Anyway, this is delicious. Are you going for another bowl?”
“Naturally. But before that... excuse me! Two beers, please!”
“Right away! Two beers!”
A pair of glasses filled with beer was delivered to their table.
“We drink these, then move on to the next ramen.”
“Right, right. Let’s dig in.”
The two noble girls shared a quick toast and drank their beer.
Over at the heat-soaked Village Five smithy, the rhythmic pounding of hammers swung by Dwarf blacksmiths echoed all day long.
“Alright, shift’s over! Those on break, make sure you stay hydrated. Those heading out, hit the baths, grab some food, and head home.”
The Dwarfs moved in perfect sync with their foreman’s orders.
“Phew, put in a good day’s work today.”
“Living the dream, aren’t we? Do you know what’s on the menu today?”
“The early shift guys mentioned fish.”
“Fish, huh? Sounds great.”
“Everything they serve here is good, so I’m happy with whatever it is.”
The Dwarfs finishing their shift gathered at the bathhouse dedicated to the smithy workers. The water here was heated using excess fire from the forge, meaning it had the unfortunate drawback of being unavailable whenever the smithy wasn’t running.
“I’m grateful to have a bath every day, but I’ve always wondered... why do we have to eat after the bath?”
“That’s obvious.”
“Is it?”
“Yeah.”
Because the smithy was loud, it was located a short distance away from Village Five. This made it difficult for the workers to visit the village’s restaurants during their breaks. Furthermore, since they primarily worked night shifts from sunset to sunrise, there weren't many places open to begin with.
To resolve this dissatisfaction, Yoko, the Acting Village Head of Village Five, had established a dedicated restaurant for them. It operated twenty-four hours a day on a shift rotation. The menu changed daily, and while there was only one option with no substitutions allowed, it was provided for free to anyone working the forge. Consequently, its reputation was stellar.
“It’d be even better if the alcohol was free, too.”
“If they did that, the barrels would be empty in seconds. See, this drink right here is exactly why we bathe before we eat.”
“Ah, I get it now.”
“Right? Soaking in steaming hot water after a hard shift, and then pouring cold beer down your throat once you’re all refreshed... Nnn, there’s nothing better!”
“You’re right... that’s unbeatable!”
The young Dwarf blacksmith paid a medium copper coin and ordered another round.
The Village Five security team had set working hours, but they also had regular night shifts. In truth, these night shifts were so well-compensated—with higher pay and provided snacks—that some members claimed they wanted to do nothing but work at night.
However, the biggest draw of the night shift was that the subsequent time off fell during the day.
“Broad daylight. Sitting at a terrace seat while it’s still empty, watching everyone else work... and gulping down this cold one! It’s the absolute best!”
Of course, this behavior tended to attract looks of pure resentment from the security members who were currently on duty.
“During the next training session, I’m going to be extra hard on that guy.”
“Hey, come on, that’s just cruel!”
“Well, I think no matter where you are, drinking tastes best when you’re with your boyfriend. Oh, you don’t have one? Ahaha... sorry about that.”
“Finish the manuscript. Put everything I have into it. And once it’s done... sleep. Sleep like the dead. Then, when I wake up and check over the finished pages, the drink I have then is the best. No, it’s transcendent.”
Aren’t you just drunk in a completely different way?
“I suppose there’s no helping the fact that your own work suits your tastes the best.”
I think being able to move yourself to tears with your own writing is a talent in itself.
Phew. I’m exhausted. And I’m drunk.
How did things end up like this?
It all started with some idle chatter over drinks. I believe it was Galf who brought it up.
“I know the situation you’re in can change the flavor. But if that’s the case, what is the absolute best situation for drinking?”
The topic took the Village of the Great Tree by storm. We narrowed the category of alcohol down to beer and eventually reached a final conclusion. We had our answer, but to see if it held true elsewhere, we decided to conduct a survey in the more populous Village Five as well.
That was fine and all, but I think having me personally experience every one of those scenarios was taking things a bit too far. Well, I didn’t actually go through all of them, though.
So, what were the results of the Village Five investigation? In the end, they couldn’t overturn the conclusion reached back at the Village of the Great Tree.
I see. So that really is the peak beer-drinking experience.
Drinking and laughing with family and friends at a banquet.
I won’t deny it. And I’m open to other opinions.
Incidentally, the Special Award went to “drinking after a long period of abstinence.”
The one category disqualified from the running entirely was “drinking while on the clock.”