The President-exclusive Machine was a masterpiece of gaudy, nouveau riche excess.
Its paint job was an unnecessary riot of primary colors, accented by useless, blinking LEDs.
If it were up to me, I would have stripped those off immediately.
Why is it that the vulgar wealthy always gravitate toward the same tacky aesthetic?
And there, in the center of the machine—roughly where the solar plexus would be—sat a face.
"Uh... Fairy-san... could you cross-reference this?"
I really didn't want to know.
"It is the Ozen Alliance President. He has physically become a part of the machine."
"I want to go home now."
"Please, just endure it."
"What are you mumbling about?! Let's settle this with a duel right now!"
The President was screaming.
Ah... right.
"I'm heading out."
"It is possible to just ignore him, you know?"
"He called me out by name. It'd be rude not to."
I launched in the Massacre Night.
I was shot off the catapult with a quick heave-ho.
Isn't this a bit disrespectful, no matter how you look at it?
I'm an active-duty soldier, for crying out loud.
"Imperial Guard Knight Order, stay on standby. Handle any reinforcements if they show up."
"By your command."
Now then, let's kill him as fast as possible.
With that thought in mind, I closed the distance.
"Hu, huhahaha! What is that shabby machine?!"
Shut up.
My child is the coolest thing in the galaxy!
I felt a bit miffed, but thinking calmly, the enemy was practically begging to chat.
It was time for some information extraction.
"Yo, President. You've certainly ended up with a... unique look."
"The Archduke of Chronos seems to be nothing more than a child."
Goo-goo, ga-ga.
"I, the Ozen Alliance President, Donald, have transcended humanity and become a god!"
"O-Oh. Well, good for you."
God, hair, paper—be whatever you want.
Besides, if you were truly a god, you wouldn't need to duel me. You could just trigger some kind of divine punishment.
"So, what about this 'god'?"
"Stricken by a fatal disease, I made a wish! I asked to be made a god in exchange for the lives of the masses—those pigs!"
"Did you make that wish to the Zen God Race?"
"Yes! I have become a member of the Zen God Race! I shall reign over Ozen as a god! I shall lead the Steel Legion and unify the entire universe!"
"I think you could have actually become the King of Chronos if you'd played your cards right."
...Suddenly, he went silent.
He was trembling and shaking in his cockpit.
"That's right... it's all your fault."
Why me?
It’s not my fault.
Me becoming the Archduke of Chronos was basically just how things turned out. I was just swept along by the current of fate.
"Leo Kamishiro Chronos! If only you hadn't become a King! I wouldn't have had to offer my citizens—those pigs—as sacrifices! I am the one who should be praised! I am the one who should leave a name in history!"
"Like I care, you idiot! And hey, I don't offer my citizens as sacrifices! Don't lump me in with you, moron!"
My head was starting to hurt.
Listen, pal—you are going to leave your name in history.
As the idiot who destroyed Ozen.
"I, the most superior being in the entire universe, shall now subjugate the Archduke of Chronos!"
"...You bitter, envious citizen!"
The President-exclusive Machine charged forward.
Whoa! Its response speed was fast!
A Direct Neural Link—thought equals action, then!
"Ha, hahaha..."
I felt the strength drain out of me.
"What is wrong? O weak one. Ah, come to think of it, I was always superior. Praised as a child prodigy from my youth, graduating university with honors, the book I wrote as a student became a bestseller, and I even succeeded as a politician! I am the one truly fit to be the Galactic Overlord!"
"So what? I'm just the third son of a poor noble who was the Punishment King in the junior officer academy. While I was an honor student in the senior academy, I only got promoted because of the Zork War. My wife just happens to be the Galactic Empire Emperor. Even being the Archduke of Chronos is more than I deserve! I want to transition to a democracy and retire as soon as possible!"
I loudly declared my pathetic circumstances with a "Ba-bam!"
Immediately, a scolding flew in from Wifey.
"Fool! My Lord Groom is the strongest warrior in the Empire—nay, the universe! A wise ruler and the best of men!"
"Thanks! So, as you can see, I haven't been fired yet! Give it up!"
We clashed.
I caught the charging President's blade and entered a lock.
I was pushed back slightly.
"Ha! It seems my machine is superior in power!"
"And... there!"
I shifted the angle of the lock, causing the President to lose his balance.
"How unfortunate. I'm a professional soldier, you see. My experience is on a different level from yours!"
The President pulled out a gun and started firing.
His posture was terrible! His stance was worse! Where are you even looking, you idiot?!
It was the kind of shooting where he just hoped he'd hit something eventually by spraying and praying.
I evaded only the shots flying directly toward me.
While dodging, I dashed in and punched the face on his chest.
"Gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"
"That hurt, didn't it? You've never been hit before, have you?"
I felt kind of annoyed, so I delivered a knee strike.
It didn't look like anything was attached to his crotch.
So, I drove my knee into the thigh section of his machine instead.
"Guaaaaaaaaaaa!"
"Just as I thought. Since you're neurally linked, you even feel the pain!"
No way! There’s no way things would be that convenient for you!
Well, even if he didn't feel pain, I would have used that to my advantage anyway! Like by repeating light attacks to disable his movements!
Even so, President!
You were lucky!
If this were on the ground, I would have invited you to joint-lock hell!
I would have slammed you down repeatedly, torn off your limbs, and snapped your neck!
But since we're in space, I'll cut you down normally!
I accelerated and closed in. He fired wildly, but he couldn't hit a thing!
"First, the wrist!"
I severed his wrist with my katana in a clean stroke.
"Gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"
Well, yeah, it’s an amputation. It’s going to hurt.
"Why?! Why are you faster?!"
"Because I've trained until I was ready to die."
The President drew his sword again and swung it blindly.
I delivered a Leo-kun Punch directly to the fingers gripping the hilt.
His fingers crumpled with a sickening crunch.
"Gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"
"You dropped your sword."
I kicked the President's sword as it drifted in the void.
The blade spun and pierced straight into the President's machine's stomach.
"A, agagagagagagagag..."
"I picked it up for you. You're lucky I'm so kind."
"W-Why... why..."
"It's called a difference in skill. Now, it's time for your judgment."
"J-Judgment...?"
"Locust terrorist attacks and the massacre of your own citizens. From what I know alone, I could sentence you to death ten times over."
"D-Death sentence?! I am the Ozen President! I am the god who rules this galaxy!"
"Ah, sorry. The only one I believe in is Zashiki-warashi-chan. Now then, are you ready? In the name of Leo Kamishiro Chronos, I sentence you!"
I accelerated to full speed.
"I-I am! Superior to anyone..."
"Punishment!"
I sliced the President-exclusive Machine in half, right through the President's face.
The President was swallowed by the resulting explosion.
This scene was being broadcast not only to Chronos, but also to Latarnia, the Taikyoku Nation, and the Ogre God Nation.
Chronos's victory over Ozen was now absolute.
In Latarnia, victory sales broke out in every district.
In the Taikyoku Nation, the streets turned into a massive festival.
Somehow, the rumor that Shiyun was coming to me as a bride was being spread as a settled fact.
Are you people really okay with that?!
In the Ogre God Nation, those worked into a frenzy by the revenge for the locust attacks began jumping into the river. A mascot character for Round 1-2-3 was tossed into the water along with them.
Apparently, the local baseball team stopped being able to win after that, but I wouldn't know anything about that.