I had a nagging feeling we’d botched the squad assignments, but we resumed the operation anyway.
Now that the water was drained, we entered the ruins through the main gate. While we took the direct approach, Eddie’s Squad and the other units set out to open up alternative routes.
Inside, the black walls throbbed with a rhythmic pulse.
“Those walls look cursed... This is getting creepy,” I muttered.
Isono shot back, “If a facility designed to build massacre weapons had pink floral tiles, it’d be a hell of a lot creepier.”
I guess he had a point. If an evil laboratory built on layers of dark conspiracies looked like a fancy room with floral wallpaper, the sheer psychopathy of it would be terrifying.
As I was nodding in agreement, Isono pressed on. “You should spare a thought for the enemy nations being trampled by a Grand Duke who only thinks about his stomach!”
“But I’m starving!”
As usual, I was famished.
We pushed further inside. We found a giant pool with contaminated water constantly pouring into it. Ah, so that was the trick.
“They just kept polluting the planet until the locusts occurred naturally.”
The sheer, unrefined malice of it actually impressed me. That was the kind of idea only someone born into wealth could come up with. With my middle-class sense of money, I never would’ve thought of it.
If it were up to me, I would’ve manufactured them safely in a lab. No—I wouldn’t have made locusts in the first place. I would’ve rejected the proposal the moment it hit my desk. Completely destroying the infrastructure is just bad economic policy. The locals would hate you for eternity, you’d have to rebuild everything, and you’d have to rule the planet while living in constant fear of terrorist threats.
What a bunch of morons.
Seeing my bitter expression, Isono asked, “Hey, Leo. What were they going to do if the locusts developed a resistance to the mold?”
“They probably engineered them to prevent genetic mutations so they couldn’t build up a resistance.”
Of course, you can’t truly control nature even if you go that far. Just look at how the Jesters multiplied!
Ah, it clicked.
“The enemy... the Zen Divine Race... they completely look down on other lifeforms.”
“Huh?”
“Think about it. The Zork didn’t understand humanity because they were secretly terrified of the Empire. But the Zen Divine Race just looks down on everyone with total arrogance. They believe they’re transcendent beings.”
“Then what the hell are these Jesters, if they’re the ones making those types scared?”
“Well... the mechanism isn’t fully explained, but they warp the laws of causality. Even if you argue they just have a knack for picking the optimal solution, they're essentially beings who always draw the correct card. Ah, I see. It’s their biological instinct to reproduce. If you release them into the wild, they’ll breed even if they have to bend causality to do it. Idiots. Their plan was flawed from the start. Reproduction was an inevitability.”
“Wait, no, stop. That’s terrifying. You’re saying if I don’t kill you right now, the universe is eventually going to be filled with Jesters?”
“It’s already too late! Ten percent of the Imperial population already has Jester blood in their veins. Not many have actually awakened as Jesters, though.”
Well, think about it. They have a cheerful comedian temperament, their bodies are sturdy and hard to kill, they're communication masters, and they contribute to the group just by being there thanks to their constant buffs. Of course they’d find it easy to leave descendants.
In an RPG, it’d be the absolute worst kind of ability—zero firepower. But in a simulation game—especially at a national management level, managing internal affairs—that’s where it becomes a beast of a trait. Just by existing, they make the community flourish.
Even the Emperor back in the days of the first House Kamishiro head fell for one and made them a noble. When you look at it as an evolutionary trait for the animal known as 'human,' it’s unnervingly strong. Historically, the hegemonic nations were always the ones best at communication.
“Stop it, you’re scaring me!”
I didn’t say it to Isono, but I was pretty sure he, Nakajima, and Suematsu-san were all Jester descendants. In fact, wasn’t almost the entire Officer Academy Bunch descended from them? I was certain Melissa and Rikochi were. If they weren’t, the Zork wouldn’t have prioritized wiping them out.
...I was starting to see the picture. From the Zork’s perspective, they must have panicked. 'Oh no, there are Jester descendants everywhere! We have to kill them!'
Yeah, the secrets of this world were finally starting to make sense.
“Basically, it was destiny that brought us to this galaxy.”
“So you’re saying it’s not your fault?”
“Obviously. There’s no way I could’ve done all this on my own.”
I’d always thought it was weird! Since arriving in this galaxy, I’d barely met anyone with a comedian temperament. Maybe only Saria and the Great King of the Ogre God Nation? ...No, those two were just yankees.
“Hey, Leo. Does that mean the people on this planet are...”
“Probably the descendants of the staff who worked here, or the workers who buried the place.”
“To do all that and then come back to harvest the locusts now... that’s beyond villainous!”
“Exactly.”
They really were the lowest of the low. The Taikyoku Nation was bad enough, but this was on a level where excuses didn’t even matter. The only silver lining was that the current victims didn’t know the truth.
I shook off the grim thoughts and moved deeper inside. We eventually reached a room filled with biological specimens. It was a classic setup: circular tanks filled with culture fluid containing man-sized, grotesque creatures. They looked like hairless, muscular monkeys with massive claws.
I had nothing but bad vibes about this.
“Leo... I’ve seen this scene a thousand times in games.”
“Tell me about it!”
Right then, a transmission came in from Kevin. “A device has been activated! We might have triggered a trap!”
“It’s definitely this room!”
I made eye contact with one of the specimens. It was wide awake.
“Hi, I’m Leo!”
Just being polite.
The monkey-thing shattered the glass of its incubation device and lunged. I punched it before I even drew my sword.
“Gah!”
The punch made it flinch, closing one eye. I didn’t waste the opening and pulled the trigger on my pulse rifle. The Imperial Guard Knights from the Grand Duchy of Chronos opened fire alongside me.
Isono, the bastard, was a split second late. One of the other monkeys swung its claws at him. He barely managed to block with his rifle.
“Don’t screw with me!” I shouted.
I shifted my grip, taking one hand off my rifle. I whipped out my knife and plunged it into the creature's flank, then smashed it with the rifle's butt. The moment it stopped moving, we riddled it with holes.
Isono’s Personal Guard was also busy fighting off the monkeys. They were emerging from tanks all over the room. Reports started flooding in over the comms.
“This is Riko’s Squad! We’re engaging monsters!”
“Melissa’s Squad here! We’ve got monsters too!”
“This is Claire! We’re in combat!”
Just as things were looking grim, a swarm of spiders appeared in the corner of my vision. Reinforcements.
“This is Kevin! I’m detonating!”
Pop, pop! The monkeys’ necks started exploding one after another. Kevin’s self-destruct drones were doing their work.
“Whew... did we get them? Isono, you still alive?”
“Barely. Kevin is the one guy I never want as an enemy.”
And to think his real job was being a doctor... The guy was too talented for his own good.
I was about to take a breather when Eddie’s voice crackled over the radio.
“This is Eddie! Edge’s Squad and I are engaging android soldiers! The pulse rifles aren't doing enough damage! Send backup!”
...It looked like they were putting up a real fight. What the hell was wrong with this place?!” }