I fought Katori-sensei.
It was a struggle so gruesome I can barely describe it.
Yeah, I really gave it my all.
"Leo, you coward! You used an Adhesive Grenade!"
Katori-sensei was currently glued in place, unable to move.
"Pupii! I'll use every dirty trick in the book to win! Hahaha, victory is mine! Pure joy!"
I won!
Today was finally the day I triumphed!
Or so I thought.
"Oh? Is that how it’s going to be?"
Slash! The adhesive was severed in an instant.
Uh-oh.
"A little practice with a live blade is good for the soul once in a while, don't you think?"
Old man! Where were you hiding that?!
"It’s not good at all! Ah, Sensei, I just remembered! I have Lady Hanazawa's flower arrangement class! I’m leaving early!"
Whizz! The tip of the blade closed in.
I managed to dodge by a hair.
"Eek! That’s a real edge! It’s actually sharp!"
"Pick up a sword, brat. There’s a live blade over there."
"I decline, good sir!"
I scurried away like a cockroach.
Suddenly, shuriken came whistling toward me.
"Gyaaaaa!"
"Don’t you run! I’ll kill you!"
"Heeelp!"
...Or so I pretended before lobbing a flash grenade!
But before I could even pull the pin, Katori-sensei lunged. If that hit me, I was dead!
I tried to pull the pin while dodging, but... Gugh!
A high kick exploded against my face.
"Ahhn..."
It was no use. I couldn't take it anymore.
I’d pretend to be unconscious... then pull the pin and—Fire!
But Katori-sensei saw right through me.
A kick landed squarely on my jaw.
The flash grenade slipped from my hand and detonated.
"My eyes! My eyesss!"
And so, with a spectacular self-inflicted explosion, I was out of the count.
"Are you an idiot? You’re so much weaker than usual that I’m actually starting to worry."
Katori-sensei was genuinely concerned about my slump.
"I’m just not feeling it, you know? Apparently, if I go back to being a citizen of the Gag World, I’ll get my strength back."
"So you tried to force the comedy?"
"Precisely, my good sir."
"Fine. Be a gag character by tomorrow."
Once he granted me that reprieve, I was released.
But how am I supposed to just "become a gag character"?
I had no clue.
With nothing else to do, I slunk off to the dining hall.
Inside, a banner had been hung: [LEO, CHEER UP].
"Hey, idiot. Perk up."
Isono and Nakajima greeted me.
"O-oh...?"
Eddie walked over too.
"Have some takoyaki!"
He shoved one into my mouth.
"Hot! Argh!"
Who does that?!
"Are you trying to kill me?!"
Wait—this rhythm!
Is the Nipple Drill next? Or the Rubber Snap?!
I braced myself, but instead, a cake appeared.
"Eat something sweet and get your head in the game."
Melissa brought it over.
"It’s the Fruit-loaded Cake you love, Leo-kun," Nina-san added with a smile.
I gave Nina-san a thumbs-up, then did the same for Claire.
Because there was no doubt—the fruit source was Claire.
Even though the joint venture with the trading company was technically mine too, Claire was the real power there.
If Claire-san told them to fetch something, they’d do it even if it killed them.
Actually, that’s a joke; they’d do it with absolute gusto.
Outer space was a popular assignment these days.
It was the frontier where true adventure awaited.
An incredible number of people wanted to see it for themselves.
Well, they were actual aliens, after all.
Interestingly, Latarnia wasn't a major hotspot.
It was popular for career climbers, but the destinations with creatures completely different from humans—like the turtles and rabbits—were the big hits.
I guess everyone wants to see that.
As for the Proone, civilians were strictly prohibited from contact.
We treated them like an endangered species.
You could never be sure some lunatic wouldn't try to eat one.
I figured we’d need to protect them for ten, maybe fifty years.
Anyway, I savored the fruit.
Delicious.
Since then, Lady Hanazawa seemed to have bonded with Melissa and Claire.
Apparently, Lady Hanazawa held an art name in flower arrangement and was a Natori in Japanese classical dance.
I didn't quite understand it, but it sounded impressive. Traditional arts were beyond me.
So they were having her give bridal training... or rather, a trial lecture.
I heard Nakajima's fianc e was a tea ceremony master.
I kind of wanted to try it myself.
Everyone was learning casually, not really treating it like "bridal training."
In all honesty, refinement was exactly what we lacked.
Compared to those born as high-ranking nobles, our cultural background was pretty weak.
We all ate cake and hung out.
We started singing using the handy karaoke I’d "borrowed" from Katori-sensei.
As it turned out, some of our group were amazing singers—pro-level, even.
There were people who’d wanted to join the military band, and former band members who’d been aiming for a debut during their gap years.
Me? I was just average.
The most boring one to listen to.
Listen to the song of a man who failed at both piano and guitar!
"Boeeee~♩"
Shiyun was there too.
She didn't know the songs, right?
Wait—you watched the anime?
Alright, go for it!
When she sang, she was fantastic!
Then there was Tatiana.
"I ain't singing."
"O-oh, alright."
I was about to put the mic away when One-oh-one whispered to me.
"Tatiana is quite the singer-de arimasu."
Ho ho!
Interesting intel.
"Ah! Big Bro, you’ve got that wicked look on your face! I told you I’m not singing!"
She protested, but as soon as I handed her the mic, she sang her heart out.
She was good... damn.
Her voice was incredible!
The former pop and vocal music club members approached her with beaming smiles.
"No way!"
Tatiana turned away, pouting.
She was really at that moody adolescent age.
But when Shiyun asked, "Aren't you going to do it?", she wavered.
She couldn't withstand the respectful gaze of her junior sister.
Consequently, Tatiana was signed up for singing lessons after her shifts.
Wait.
I just realized something. As this whole slice-of-life segment went on, I started feeling much better.
Could it be... that I recover just by living a normal life?
I went over to my wifey.
"Wifey, I think my power came back just by hanging out like this."
"What?! That’s all it takes?!"
Exactly.
What a completely half-baked ability!