I was in a private room for senior officers, and Hanako, my fiancée, was with me.
I still hadn't adjusted to sharing a living space with a woman. Even changing my clothes felt like a delicate operation.
Hanako Hanazawa. She was a young lady from a high-society family. I'd never even dreamed of being engaged to a princess from such a prestigious house. For most of my life, the prospect of remaining a lifelong bachelor had been quite high. I suppose I’d become a man of some status myself.
“Why... is that, I wonder?”
“Hanako? Why is what?”
“Why do you go out of your way to act as the villain everyone dislikes?”
Ugh, not this troublesome topic again... But we were going to be husband and wife. It was probably better to talk about it honestly. Leo and his group were always open with each other, after all.
She was likely referring to my various bouts of eccentric behavior. It was true that those were intentional acts, and it seemed she’d seen right through me.
“Leo is the captain, and Ed provides the support. That’s why Nakajima and I decided it was our job to stir things up.”
“Why? Isn’t a soldier’s duty to follow their captain quietly?”
“It doesn’t work like that. That guy Leo is a Jester. If he isn’t playing the fool, his abilities actually drop. And yet, the bastard is serious in the weirdest ways. Nakajima and I make sure he doesn’t have a spare moment to worry. Even now, he’s moping around like the protagonist of some tragic novel. I’m just figuring out how to snap him back to his senses.”
“Hehe. You really do care about your friends.”
“Exactly.”
How’s that for cool? But Hanako, while still smiling, spoke with a voice that had turned ice-cold.
“By the way... what about that Girls' Ranking incident?”
“That was entirely my fault, sir.”
“I thought you would find such cowardly behavior distasteful, Lord Isono.”
“It was meant as a silly joke among the boys, but it ended up hurting the girls far more than I expected. I’m reflecting on it now.”
Seriously, I never thought Melissa would get that angry. I was young back then. Well, 'young' was a poor excuse for making enemies in every direction. As for the other guys—Ed was fine since we just dragged him along—but the ones who really blew the whole thing out of proportion are still running away. That’s why you guys will never be forgiven! In our class, the only innocent ones were probably Leo and Ed. Oh, and maybe Kevin, if you count him as one of the boys? Kevin was never invited to the group from the start because he’d just get huffy and say, 'You shouldn’t say things like that!'
It’s kind of irritating. Why are Nakajima and I the only ones still getting lectured?
“I’m going to go kick Leo’s ass for a bit.”
“I shall accompany you.”
She seemed strangely happy about that.
As for where that idiot Leo might be... The Dining Hall, the Shrine, the training room, or maybe the dojo. He wasn't in the Dining Hall, so I ended up eating Yulinchi with Hanako. It was delicious. Wait, this was a menu item from that Chinese Dining Hall near the officer academy. Come to think of it, Leo really loved this dish.
“Ah... that idiot. He’s really struggling.”
“The Grand Duke is?”
“Yeah. If he’s recreating the Officer Academy's Sentimental Menu, it means he’s being pushed to his limit.”
“The Grand Duke is more delicate than I imagined.”
“He is. What an idiot.”
While we were eating, Nakajima and his group showed up. He was with his fiancée, too.
“Yo, Isono. Want to play some baseball?”
“Before that, do you know where Leo is? I’m going to kick his butt.”
“Hmph! This Nakajima is far too busy with a Lovey-dovey Event with his fiancée to know the whereabouts of some musty man!”
Then, the woman beside him—a very refined-looking young lady—pulled on a chain. Wait, a chain? The chain was attached to a collar around Nakajima’s neck. As she pulled it, Nakajima let out a choked 'Ugh.'
Wait, wasn't that just a choker? Hey, why are you two living such an advanced relationship? I looked at Hanako and smiled.
“I’m really glad I’m with you, Hanako.”
“Your smile is a little irritating for some reason.”
I mean, collar play... that’s a bit too much stimulation for me. I’m only a tiny bit interested. After finishing our meal, we joined up with Nakajima’s group. Hanako and Nakajima’s fiancée seemed to get along well.
“So, what’s up with that moron Leo?”
“He’s depressed, so I thought I’d go mess with him.”
“Ahahaha! Perfect! Alright, let’s take out all our daily frustrations—”
“Lord Nakajima.”
“Ah, yes. Right.”
I felt like if I paid too much attention to the occasional bouts of tension, I’d lose.
“Please don’t be too hard on him. Nakajima is worried about Leo in his own way.”
I wasn’t sure if that was true. But he probably wasn't not worried. He was currently looking at me with eyes that begged for his life, practically screaming, 'I’m worried about him, sir.'
The four of us headed to the Shrine. There, we found Leo playing catch with a mysterious shadow. Leo claimed there was a 'little girl' there, but I couldn't see her... though I could tell he was throwing a ball to something.
About half the women could see her, but only a few of the men. Maybe it was a difference in sensitivity? Even Luna-chan had said, 'I don’t get it. I give up.' The world is full of mysteries—especially our boss’s behavior.
“Oh, what’s up? Zashiki-warashi-chan, let’s take a timeout for a bit.”
Leo walked over with a stupid look on his face. I kicked him in the butt without saying a word. Then, I handed over the snacks I’d bought with Nakajima to the mysterious shadow.
“Thank you...”
To me, it didn't look human, and the voice didn't sound human either. But I hadn't heard any reports of it causing trouble. Veronica-chan and Luna-chan had decided it wasn't a problem, so it was probably fine.
“My, my, Lord Isono. Who is this child?”
“Our Guardian Deity. Zashiki-warashi-chan.”
It seemed Hanako could see her. Conversely, Nakajima’s fiancée couldn't see a thing. She just stood there with a face that said, 'What are they doing?'
“Oh, hello. Would you like to play with your big sister?”
“Play!”
It seemed Hanako was being considerate. Nakajima’s fiancée stepped in to help her, though she still looked completely baffled. As for Nakajima, he could only see a faint blur and couldn't hear the voice at all. Well, whatever. If it’s there, it’s there.
“Yo, Captain. I heard you were moping around.”
“So annoying!”
How rebellious.
“We’re in a war. Sacrifices happen, right?”
“But... that girl only lived for a few months. And yet...”
He was talking about Shiyun's Clone. Lord Eyens really was a Jester-killer. He’d put his life on the line for the Crown Prince—who shared a name with his dead sister—and committed some truly foul acts. And then he dumped all the fallout on us! Since he was already dead, I couldn't even punch him. God, what a coward! That old man!
“Yeah, well. We’ll make those Ghouls pay. But listen, if you’re being all serious, our performance drops, too! Get back to being a creature of the Gag World already!”
I kicked his butt again.
“You’re the invincible Jester! You have a responsibility to remain a resident of the Gag World!”
“What kind of insane logic is that?!”
“Shut up!”
I swung a punch at Leo.
“Ah! You hit me! Not even my father—bugera!”
I wasn't going to let him finish that line, the moron!
“Shut up, you idiot!”
After that, we punched each other to our hearts' content until Katori-sensei arrived. Man... my face hurts.
“Hehe. Good work, Lord Isono.”
Once we got back, I had Hanako give me a lap pillow. I really can't stand up to her at all.