“But the Lord Groom has business elsewhere!”
Wifey was currently giving me a thorough scolding regarding the large spaceship license.
“Do you not trust me, Lord Groom?!”
“No, it’s not that. It’s just, you know, even if you don't want to exile me, if things ever get politically messy, you might be forced into a situation where you have no choice.”
In response, she hit me with a flurry of light pummels.
I realized I had to put my feelings into words properly.
“I just don’t want to be a burden to you, Wifey. That’s why, if the time ever comes, I’ll just disappear. No one would ever suspect I was hauling cargo in the private sector, right?”
“You! You absolute idiot!!!”
She hit me again.
“Are you suggesting that I lack the resourcefulness to protect my own family?!”
I dropped into a formal kneeling position—seiza—before she even had to tell me to.
“It is exactly as you say.”
True, Wifey would certainly find a way to make things work.
But still, I would eventually get sick or grow old. I was terrified of becoming a nuisance to everyone when that happened.
“In the first place, I would utterly crush any faction that dared to slight you.”
“Th-Then, please just let me know a little before I become a hindrance to the Empire, and I’ll retire...”
“Very well! I shall inform you when that time comes! ...But really, do you honestly think the military would ever let you go?”
“If I become a nuisance... look, the Imperial Army is winning too much. They might become too nationalistic internally, and we could clash in the future.”
“U... Umu... That thought had not occurred to me. You are always fooling around, Lord Groom, and yet you observe your surroundings so keenly...”
It seemed I was finally forgiven.
“Indeed, it would be bad if they leaned too far into the Hawkish Faction... In this atmosphere, they might even start talking about the Unification of Outer Space...”
I really didn't like the sound of that.
From an Imperial diplomatic and security standpoint, I wanted the Ogre God Nation to become a major power, but the idea of the Empire unifying everything was just too far-fetched.
“I shall go consult with my elder brothers for a moment. Lord Groom, you stay here...”
“Ah, Wifey, wait. Here's a snack.”
I heated up some hotcakes in the microwave and finished them off by garnishing them with whipped cream, chocolate sauce, fruit, and berry sauce.
“Lord Groom... I have thought this for a while, but could you not make a living in the food industry as well?”
“No way. When I see Nina-san, I truly realize I’m just a frog in a well...”
I was only good at making things in large quantities, but Nina-san provided overwhelming quality on top of that. If she ever opened a shop, I’d probably go there for every single meal. I didn't feel like I could ever win against her.
“W-Well, Nina is in a class of her own...”
She really was incredible.
With the misunderstanding cleared up, I went to see Saria.
“’Sup.”
I strolled into Saria's room like I owned the place. I poured some tea into my own teacup without being asked and took a seat.
Saria didn't mind at all.
“Did something happen?”
“I was told that a high-ranking noble and senior officer shouldn't wander around in the school-designated tracksuit. They’re worried people will think the pay is too low.”
“Well, that’s only natural. If those at the top don't show their employees a dream, who else is going to be motivated? If the superiors wear cheap clothes, morale drops. Your position is the goal for the soldiers, after all.”
“I guess you're right. Maybe I’ll just buy the tracksuit manufacturer...”
I had enough money lying around to buy the whole company.
I still couldn't understand why the guys in the Duke Association were always short on cash. It was a complete mystery.
“That sounds like a great idea.”
“Which part?”
“Well, the physiques of the Ogre God Nation and the people of the Empire aren't that different. Why not do a collaboration with our apparel industry?”
That was an option.
“Fairy...”
“I have already summoned Claire-chan.”
As expected of the Fairy. She always appeared whenever there was a hint of something interesting.
Claire arrived carrying a stack of documents.
“Here is a list of manufacturers we can acquire and a list of designers we can commission. When I contacted the trading company, they put these materials together in three minutes.”
“...I’m kind of sorry for the trouble.”
“Remember when you grilled takoyaki in front of the cafe chain staff? That became an absolute massive hit.”
“Now that you mention it, I remember that.”
“Since then, any whim of yours has been put on a high-priority system.”
It was likely a result of Jester's Ability. Or perhaps just wild instinct.
“I'm... sorry about that...”
“Everyone is happy to do it, but I imagine the internal logistics are a nightmare...”
“U-Uwaah...”
Saria looked completely put off. Following this incident, the theory that ‘merchants in the Empire are also a bit crazy’ became common knowledge within the Ogre God Nation Ministry of Foreign Affairs.
Personally, I think it was just the trading company.
Anyway, we discussed which manufacturer to partner with among the Academy group. The sheer intensity of the Graduate School Girls Group was a sight to behold. Thinking about it, adult women would naturally be more knowledgeable about these things.
Meanwhile, the boys wanted a sports manufacturer they admired, while the girls were split toward ultra-luxury brands.
Claire simply said, “Why not both?” and contacted the trading company. Within that same day, a letter of agreement for a collaboration between the trading company, the sports manufacturer, and the luxury brand was delivered. They were even launching a joint venture.
The Academy group would hold seventy percent of the shares. Since everyone had money to burn, they shamelessly poured in capital.
It was then that I realized I had messed up. The scale of this had grown terrifyingly large.
A few days later, representatives arrived at the Battle Dome. Thomas had joined the fray, having heard about it from somewhere. Naturally, Wifey joined the discussion as well.
Hahahaha... How did it come to this? I couldn't control it anymore. I just wanted a tracksuit that wouldn't be embarrassing to wear on a battleship.
Feeling a bit scared, I tipped off a high-ranking military official, and then the military wanted a piece of the action too. It turned into a discussion with official military adoption in sight.
S-Someone, stop them!!! The Ministry of Foreign Affairs should be able to do something!
...That was what I thought at the time.
Instead, those bastards at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs poured in a massive budget, framing it as a goodwill event with the Ogre God Nation and the Battle Dome. It was decided that a fashion show featuring Ogre God Nation-style apparel and the Battle Dome latest fashion would be held.
Then, for some reason, I got a call from Big Brother Sam. I’d left the management of the facilities I owned in his hands.
“They’re saying they want to do a fashion show at our shopping mall. They said they wanted to do it at your shopping mall too, so I’ve set up the schedule. The military and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs are giving their full cooperation. They even said they’d hold a parade.”
A dry laugh escaped my lips. They intended to milk this ‘just making a tracksuit’ story for everything it was worth.
Saria could only manage a twitching smile as well. On the Ogre God Nation and Battle Dome side, it had turned into a massive uproar as a goodwill event with the Empire. All three parties had been looking for a point of contact for dialogue and cooperation. From creating jobs for the unemployed people of the Turtle and Wolf nations whose economies were dead, everyone involved was dead serious.
Except for us, who had acted on a whim.
I watched the broadcast of the event with Ren and Claire.
“What are we going to do?”
“Whatever you do, Lord Husband, it always turns into something flashy. You just have to give up.”
“Waaaaah, Claire~!”
“Give up. Fight!”
Bieeeennn!