A coup d'etat.
His country had been snatched away while he was away for just a little while.
Was it the nature of the nation itself, or was the Great King simply that despised?
I was glad Wifey’s approval rating was high.
Even the Democratization Faction had faded into obscurity lately.
Wifey had publicly stated, “If anyone can run this country better than me, I’ll step down and let them take over whenever they want.”
She’d even mentioned, “I’ll be taking maternity leave once the baby arrives.”
So far, there had been no takers. Or rather, the moment anyone declared, “I’ll do it!”, they’d become an assassination target for every single political faction.
The will of the people was unified: “Do you think this is a joke after we’ve worked this hard to rebuild?! We’ll kill you!!!”
The Empire’s administrative functions were already automated by the Fairies.
As long as the ruler wasn't a total imbecile, the minimum requirements for governance were met.
Yes—Maro and his merry Duke Association had been home-run-level idiots.
I didn’t know how much actual ability the Great King possessed.
I just hoped he was a decent enough monarch.
I headed back to the Battle Dome to get the full story from Saria.
“I want you to be honest. What’s the Great King like politically?”
“I’m not trying to take my father’s side, but... a coup is illegal, plain and simple.”
I wondered why she phrased it that way.
Sure, citizens in a monarchy don't exactly have a right to revolution.
But it wasn't something you could normally label "illegal" with such absolute certainty.
“In the Ogre God Nation, the Great King is replaced only if someone challenges him to a duel and wins. If a change in power doesn’t happen through a duel, it’s illegal.”
“What happens if the Great King dies suddenly?”
“Those who want the throne gather for a battle royale. The last one standing becomes the Great King.”
Were they out of their minds?
“Ultimately, the Great King must be the Strongest of the Ogre God Nation. The people would never accept the country being taken over by any other means. By now, the coup faction is likely being flooded with challenges for a duel.”
So this was the logical extreme of a meathead nation.
While I was busy being flabbergasted, Wifey arrived.
“I’ve finished my talk with the Great King.”
“What’s the plan?”
“For the time being, the Empire will take him under our protection.”
Was that really okay?
“What about things like war crimes?”
“In this galaxy, war itself isn't illegal to begin with. As for the massacre of civilians... how about it, Saria?”
“I don’t believe there are any. For better or worse, the Ogre God Nation has no interest in losers.”
What a refreshingly battle-crazed, meathead nation!
“Then who are the hostile forces?”
“The most likely candidate is the Holy Proone Empire. They have been pressuring us to convert.”
“Ah... yeah, we definitely won’t be getting along with Proone.”
It was impossible.
The Empire was tolerant toward religion.
Rather, it was that specific brand of "carefree" typical of Japanese culture.
The Empire had its share of mysterious religions, but they were generally non-exclusive.
The most conflict you’d see was someone saying, “The Holy Land isn’t a tourist trap!”
On the contrary, the gaming monks and others were aggressively commercializing their main temples and Holy Lands for tourism.
The citizens had a lingering distaste for exclusionary religions.
They wouldn't stand for associating with such people.
It would be one thing if they didn't force their faith on others, but...
“Who else?”
“There’s Zork, whom you defeated, the Mechanical Soldiers, the Hunter Alliance, and so on.”
“Aside from Zork, what are their traits?”
“The Mechanical Soldiers are said to be remnants of Ancient Weapons. They attack on sight. The Hunter Alliance is a group that views other races as game for hunting. They aren't much different from Ghouls.”
“There’s no hope for them.”
It really was nothing but meathead nations out here.
“Is there anyone smart but evil?”
“That would be the Black Market. They are merchants, mercenaries, and pirates. They’ll do anything for money.”
“None of these people are any good.”
“Even so, many races are only acknowledged by the Black Market. There’s a limit to how far the Battle Dome’s trade sphere can reach, after all.”
“Which faction is pulling the strings behind the scenes this time?”
“Geographically speaking, it’s likely the Ghouls and the Holy Proone Empire. The Black Market has no reason to take us over. As for the Mechanical Soldiers and the Hunter Alliance, they’re more like specific racial clusters than actual nations.”
“Wifey, is the Empire going to intervene?”
Currently, our only enemies were the Ghouls.
We could still back out at this point.
“That will likely depend on Proone’s next move.”
And so, contact with Proone was settled.
“I think it’s pointless, personally,” Saria remarked.
“We need to observe that it is pointless. They won’t just try to kill us immediately... will they?”
“They should be fine for a first meeting... though words won’t reach them!”
Yet another faction where diplomacy was impossible!
I really wanted a break.
We sent word through the Battle Dome.
An online summit was arranged immediately—as in, that very same day!
Saria had a look of pure loathing on her face.
A figure appeared on the display.
“Welcome to our order, new brothers.”
The thing that appeared... was it a slug?
“Do you wish to repent for not being born as one of us and offer yourselves up as our sustenance?”
“What in the world are you talking about?”
Even Wifey was caught off guard.
Saria whispered in her ear.
“The Proone Faith is just a flimsy excuse to justify cannibalism.”
“You should have said that sooner!”
“You wouldn’t have believed me if I did! Because they can actually speak, they’re even worse than the Ghouls!”
I couldn't read the slug’s expression, but it seemed to be fuming.
“As usual, the Battle Dome is prone to exaggeration. Listen well! You shall bear three children. Then, you shall offer one to us. By that act alone, you shall be granted eternal serenity and peace!”
“Why did the Anti-establishment Faction ever team up with something like this?!”
Diplomacy was out the window.
They were demanding to eat us. The only option left was mutual slaughter.
“Hey, Holy Nation. What do you plan to do after the coup in the Ogre God Nation?”
“We will have them provide half their population as meat. By doing so, their sins shall be forgiven, and the gates of heaven shall open to them.”
“Right. I understand.”
“Oh! Will you become meat for us as well?!”
“It’s war!!!”
Wifey snapped.
Had these guys picked a fight on purpose?
Or were they just naturally this oblivious...
The oblivious type, definitely.
“Ho-ho-ho. Zork was poisonous, but... I wonder how you all will taste?”
I think I was starting to get it.
Zork had run into these guys first!
That was why he’d become "poisonous"!
Which meant... all our struggles had been caused by these guys!