A staggering number of Zork surged forward.
"Deploy self-destruct drones!"
Kevin’s drones detonated in sequence. Their payloads were rigged with shells designed to ignite the neurotoxin gas once they’d burrowed deep into the crabs’ bodies.
If the shells managed to wedge themselves inside, they dealt massive damage. I hadn't used the liquid poison yet since it seemed like it would be a waste in open space.
Several crabs caught in the drones’ blast radius exploded from within.
It was working!
It didn’t even matter if we couldn't kill them in a single shot. This was outer space; as long as we peeled off their armor, they’d be rendered immobile in seconds. We weren't creatures naturally suited for a vacuum, but the same applied to the crabs. Once their hide was breached, they were finished.
The problem was, what was the plan for when they ignored their losses and kept charging?
The crabs continued their march, undeterred by the explosions.
"Fire!"
At my signal, the real assault began. First, we unleashed a relentless barrage from the machine guns mounted on the floating mounts. Simultaneously, the missile squads—led by Suematsu-san—launched their attack.
So far, it was going exactly as simulated.
"Launch Net Missiles!"
The humanoid fighters fired their missiles in unison. You use nets to catch crayfish, dammit!
It was an obvious choice, really. If you understood the rules of this engagement, the logic was sound. This was essentially a territory-securing game. Wiping out the enemy was secondary; the side that controlled the most space won. The side pushed into a corner lost.
Strategies to counter the "violence of numbers" had been perfected since ancient times. That’s why I wasn't above using such cheap tricks. The nets were made of a high-strength alloy, designed to entangle the Zork like high-tech barbed wire and seal their movements.
Gwahahaha! You can’t move because your own allies are in the way, can you?!
"Thermal signatures from the new models!" Kevin screamed.
Say what?
I saw one of the crabs unhinge its maw. Oh, this is bad, I thought.
The next instant, a plasma round erupted from the crab's mouth. The projectile streaked toward Eddie, who was commanding the front lines—
"My loooooooord!"
With unbelievable speed, Suematsu-san intercepted the line of fire, shield raised. It was a level of agility that seemed impossible given his usually sluggish piloting. Suematsu-san caught the blast squarely on his shield.
"Nuaaaah! I—I’m not stopping!"
I wanted to yell at him to just use his thrusters to decelerate, but before I could get a word out, the inertia sent Suematsu-san hurtling off into the void.
...Well, okay then.
We had the Position Confirmation Signal System, so we’d find him eventually. That old man... he certainly picked a comedic time to make his exit.
Then, the new model crabs opened their mouths in unison.
"A-all forces, open fire!" Eddie signaled the resumption of the attack.
Well, the solution here was simple enough. The inside of the mouth had to be a weak point.
"Target their mouths!" someone shouted.
I mean, it had to be, right? Everyone opened fire at once.
However, there was no way such a glaringly obvious vulnerability would actually exist. The moment we struck, the crabs began to swell.
"Thermal spikes! Get out of there!"
Just as Kevin’s warning cut through the comms, the crabs entangled in the nets detonated simultaneously. The explosion triggered a massive chain reaction.
Eddie and the other units on the front lines were tossed back by the shockwave. Eddie deployed his shield with monstrous reflexes, keeping the impact to a minimum, but not every humanoid fighter pilot shared his skill. Most of Eddie’s squad had been rendered combat-ineffective. Machines drifted with severed limbs, though miraculously, there were no fatalities. Overall, the damage to the fleet was minor.
We would continue the mission while coordinating a rescue.
"Rescue Eddie’s squad! The former Hound Squad will hold the line here!"
At this point, we were the only ones left with the reflexes necessary to survive this mess. Besides, the crabs’ numbers had been significantly thinned by that last explosion. Self-destruction was clearly a hidden trump card for the Zork as well.
Hyah-hah!
Eddie fought like a man possessed to cover his subordinates' retreat. Once he knew the crabs would explode, he simply lured them into position and picked them off. The remaining missile squads pinned the rest down with Net Missiles.
Once the evacuation was complete, Eddie regrouped with my unit.
"Melissa, I’m going out! Let's move! Ren, provide cover! Wifey, stand by! There’s probably another wave coming!"
Melissa and Eddie fell in behind me as I surged forward.
Ultimately, my mistake had been trying to command from the rear. I was a martial general unit—the kind of piece you put at the very front to rally the troops. Sitting in the back felt fundamentally wrong.
I attached myself to a floating mount—the vacuum-rated version of a fixed mount. In zero-G, it functioned less like a turret and more like a high-speed standing bike. My weapon of choice was a light machine gun. "Light" was a relative term; I had no idea what it was being measured against anymore, considering it was basically a battleship’s gun turret. I’d loaded it with ballistic rounds—the ones tipped with neurotoxin.
"Hyah-hah!"
I screamed like a B-movie villain, letting the lead fly. My allies were behind me, and since this wasn't a competitive FPS, I didn't have to worry about being shot in the back... hopefully.
The crabs were falling one after another... wait, their mouths were glowing again!
"Emergency evasion!"
Hah-hah-hah! I wasn’t about to be caught by such a predictable trick twice!
I banked hard, dodging the blast. The crabs triggered another chain reaction behind me. Melissa and the others were also zip-tied to their floating mounts, guns blazing.
A commander's job was to take the risks that made the soldiers flinch! I didn't care if people thought I was insane! I was going to carve the concept of human terror into these Zork who claimed to know no fear.
Mutual understanding only truly begins once you’re close enough to kill each other!
"This is Isono! What the hell do you think you're doing, you brat?! The CO is charging the front lines?! Hey!"
Isono was furious, but even he was screaming "Hyah-hah" himself while riding his own floating mount.
"This is Nakajima! Leo! I’m going to deck you when we get back! 'Oh, I'm just going to command a large army this time,' my ass! This is the same as always!"
Puh-leeze!
Small-fry, small-fry! Weakling big brothers!
(My inner Mesugaki level increased.)
"Leo! I’m supporting you too!" Kevin’s drones provided additional fire.
"This is Raven! My lord! Why did you head out without waiting for us?!"
Raven, having finished rescuing Eddie’s squad, came rushing toward the fray.
Perfect. The tactic was a success.
This was the 'Get Distracted by the Reckless Idiot Lord and Despair-chan Will Go Away' Technique.
Gwahahaha! Both my enemies and my allies can dance in the palm of my hand!