I’d reincarnated.
That was the simplest way to put it.
Half a year had already passed. It clearly wasn't a dream. The months I’d spent in this dilapidated wooden house were undeniably real.
Currently, I was being forced to crawl across the hard floor of this rickety shack. In any other era, this would be called child abuse, but I’d grown used to it. The skin on my knees had thickened considerably.
“Leo! Come here! Come here! Come to Mommy!”
“………… (Hmph!)”
“Ugh... ugh... Mommy loves Leo so much, and yet... ugh!”
“Daah... (A massive sigh.)”
As usual, she spread her arms and called my name—Leo. If I ignored her, she looked like she was about to burst into tears, so I had no choice but to crawl toward her.
The person I headed for was my biological mother in this world... Nina-chan.
“Kyaaaaa! So cute!!! Leo is the cutest baby in the entire world!! I can’t get enough of those exasperated, judging eyes!!!”
This was how it went no matter what I did. Total, unconditional affirmation. She beamed at me with a full-wattage smile. Then she pulled me into a hug and rubbed her cheek against mine. Rub-rub-rub-rub-rub... Okay, this is getting long... stop it.
“...Daah! (Get off me!)”
“Leo, I love you so much!!”
“...Daah (She’s hopeless.)”
I gave up. A baby’s strength was negligible. Even when I tried to push her away, she misinterpreted it as me reaching out for a hug and only squeezed tighter. Left with no choice, I resigned myself to her whims. She spent a long time sniffing my scent. It was a little ticklish.
Nina-chan picked me up and opened the window.
“It’s a beautiful day, isn’t it... Leo?”
Stretching out beyond the window were meadows and golden wheat fields. Windmills stood in the distance, and thatched-roof huts were scattered here and there. Was this a small rural village in Europe? A warm breeze, like a breath of spring, drifted in and ruffled Nina-chan’s golden hair.
I thought she was a beautiful person—though the way the highlights in her eyes disappeared whenever she looked at me was a bit frightening.
“Let’s go outside for a bit.”
“Daah.”
She put on a straw hat and got ready. I sat on the floor, watching her. Nina-chan dragged her leg as she moved. It seemed she had a physical disability, as she relied on a crutch.
“Wait just a moment.”
She smiled when our eyes met. Then, she scooped me up with one hand and headed outside. Despite her slender frame, Nina-chan was incredibly strong. She could carry me with one hand while lugging heavy buckets around on one leg. At times, it almost seemed as if some mysterious power was at work.
“Nina-chan, Little Leo, morning! Little Leo’s getting bigger by the day! How old is he now?”
“He’s already six months! Isn’t he the cutest thing you’ve ever seen?!”
“...Daah.”
“Haha! Same unfriendly baby as always! That’s what makes him so great!! Hahaha!”
Villagers called out to us as we made our way through the settlement. The old man who always called me "Little Leo" was a muscular man with a long beard. I’d taken to calling him Old Man Beard in my head.
Everyone in this village was either an elderly person or a small child. There were no young men. Come to think of it, I wondered who my biological father was. Was this a single-mother household? It seemed Nina-chan didn’t have a husband. Or perhaps he was just away on a long-term work assignment.
We finished our walk and returned home. I was given milk and put to bed. Such were my days.
Since I had spent my previous life mostly staring blankly into space, I did the same as a baby. It wasn't a hardship. Staring at the sky for hours was my specialty. Thinking about it, since I’d only ever done what Ryu told me to do in my old life, perhaps things hadn't changed all that much.
But there was one thing different from my previous world.
“Leo, I love you so much. Good night.”
“...Daah.”
It was the fact that I slept beside someone every night.
Strangely enough, I slept well. It was warm, and being held made me feel safe. However, I shook my head to dispel the thought. Whenever I’d started to open my heart to someone in the past, I’d been betrayed over and over again. Everyone except Ryu had eventually left me. They all grew to hate me.
Nina-chan surely would, too...
Then, I turned one year old. I reached the point where I could speak a few clumsy words.
It was a chilly night. This world seemed to have four seasons, and the snow falling outside made it as cold as a Japanese winter.
“Are you cold, Leo?”
“...Mm. I'm warm.”
“Mommy’s warm too! Gyuuuu!”
“...Can't breathe.”
I fell asleep that night, as I did every night, wrapped in Nina-chan’s arms. I drifted off quickly, comforted not by artificial heat, but by the pleasant warmth of another person.
Later that night, I woke up thirsty. I felt bad about waking her, so I decided to get a drink myself. To be honest, I still didn't know what to call her and found myself constantly hesitating. I couldn’t bring myself to call her Nina-san, but I couldn't call her "Mother" either. That was why I hadn’t actually addressed her by name yet.
For those reasons, I went to get the water on my own. Since I was a year old, I was at least capable of walking. I remembered Nina-chan filling a wooden bucket that morning.
“...Found it.”
The room was a bit desolate for a living room, but the bucket was right there on the table. It was too high. I had no choice but to move a chair. It was heavy, but I managed it bit by bit. Even the chair was high... okay, let's use this...
By stacking things to act as stairs, I reached the bucket and took a drink. Yeah... it was probably water.
The reason I say "probably" is because I lacked a sense of taste. I hadn't been able to taste anything I ate since my previous life. It might have started when I was a child in the institution and came down with a horrible cold. The cold was the trigger, but as the doctor Ryu took me to had said, the cause after that was psychological.
If that was the case, it made sense that even after reincarnating, I still had no sense of taste. I quenched my thirst, returned the chair to its place, and went back to the bedroom. Then I fell asleep. A baby's body was always desperately tired.
In the middle of the night, I bolted awake with a searing pain in my stomach. It hurt like hell. It wasn't the kind of pain one could just endure.
“Aaaaaah!!”
I cried out instinctively.
“Leo?!”
Nina-chan scooped me up. At that exact moment, I vomited violently. Ah... maybe that water... was it contaminated? No, it was river water, but were a child’s organs really this fragile?
Seeing me groaning in pain, Nina-chan scrambled out of bed and lit a lamp. She noticed the water spilled on the floor and realized what had happened.
“You drank that water?! How did you even reach... no, that doesn't matter right now!!”
The nausea wouldn't stop. My body felt frozen. Ah, so this is where I die...
Well... that's fine too.
I went limp and lost consciousness.
Nina-chan wrapped me in a cloth and pulled me tight against her chest.
“...Right!”
She threw open the door. The blizzard and the frigid air bit at my skin. It was a night so thick with snow that you couldn't see a foot in front of you. Nina-chan took a step out into it. Dragging her bad leg, she held me with one arm while managing a crutch and a lamp with the other.
It was a suicidal act. Going out into a blizzard in her condition. And yet, I was warm. I was protected by the cloth and the heat of her body.
“It’s okay, Leo. I’ll get you to the doctor in town. It’ll only be a little longer. Just wait.”
“............”
I don’t know how long she walked. I could hear her ragged, heavy breathing. She must have been walking for over an hour. She tripped once, but she fell in a way that shielded me and forced herself back up immediately. With her bad leg and the snow, her entire body must have been freezing and in pain. She should have been exhausted, having been woken up in the middle of the night.
And yet.
“It’s okay. Just a little further... almost there... we’re almost there, Leo.”
Why... why was she trying so hard? Why would she go this far... for someone like me?
I lost track of time. Even though Nina-chan was the one suffering, she never stopped whispering words of encouragement to me. I couldn't understand it. Overwhelmed by doubt and pain, I drifted back into a dark sleep.
Voices reached my ears. I opened my eyes a crack.
“It was food poisoning. He’s thrown it all up and I’ve administered medicine, so he should be fine now. He’s only a year old, so don't let him drink river water.”
“Thank you. Thank you so much... really, thank you, Doctor.”
Nina-chan was bowing repeatedly to a man in a white coat. We were in a slightly large house filled with unfamiliar medical equipment. A hospital? Nina-chan sat down on a chair and took my hand. I instinctively closed my eyes.
“Leo, the doctor said you’ll be okay... thank goodness.”
“............”
“Thank goodness... truly... thank... goodness...”
Completely exhausted, Nina-chan slumped over the bed and fell asleep. She gripped my hand tightly with a hand that was as cold as ice.
I reached out, grabbed the corner of the blanket, and pulled it over her. Nina-chan smiled in her sleep, pulled me closer, and climbed into the bed with me. She was so close I could hear her heartbeat.
“A... a...”
I opened my mouth, my voice trembling. I was hesitant... but I felt like this was something I had to say.
“Thank you... Mother.”
It was the first time I had ever called her that. Just saying the word made my heart race. Accepting someone else was terrifying; it made my chest tighten until I could barely breathe. I was so afraid of being rejected, so afraid of being thrown away.
But then...
“Hehe... you called me 'Mother' for the first time... Mama is so happy.”
She hugged me tight. My heart stopped racing and began to beat gently, synchronizing with the steady thump-thump of her own. Only a name had changed... but I felt like something deep inside me was beginning to shift.
Then, I turned five.
Nothing major had changed since that night, though my once-clumsy legs were now sturdy enough to run. As the days and conversations piled up, I felt more and more like I was truly living in this world.
And.
“Good morning, Mother.”
“Morning! Leo, I love you so much!”
Addressing her as "Mother" and holding normal conversations had become second nature. That was the biggest change.
Mother still insisted on giving me "good morning" kisses, rapidly alternating between my cheeks. She had already finished nine and was currently begging for a tenth. It was the same every single day. That, and the daily "I love you" hug.
“Gyuuuuu!”
“Come on... that’s long enough!!”
“Ah!”
When I finally turned away, thinking she was being too clingy, Mother stumbled. I immediately spun around and caught her in a hug. I’d been a bit too rough just now.
“Sorry... but be careful.”
“Hawawa... my son is so cool! He’s a natural-born knight!! Mwah!”
She planted a kiss on my cheek. I gave an exasperated sigh, but... it didn't feel bad.
“By the way, Mother, why is your leg like that? Was it an injury?”
“Hmm? Well... I suppose you're old enough to know now. To tell you the truth, Leo... your mother used to be a Knight.”
“Is this another one of your delusions?”
What was she talking about? Mother was a bit of an airhead, but the idea of a "Knight" was something straight out of a fantasy.
“Oh, you don’t believe me? Fine then. I shall show you my Emblem!”