I was dreaming.
It was a dream of when I finished my training with Ray.
The sight of that moment replayed in my mind like a refrain, over and over again.
I had clung to Ray and cried... so pathetically.
And Ray had accepted me. He held me as if gently wrapping me in his arms, embracing my very existence. That had made me unbeatably happy.
Maybe... maybe I could finally become who I was meant to be.
I might still be a Bird in a Cage, but I felt certain that one day I would spread my wings and fly. Or so... I had thought.
Yet the essence of the person I was did not change quite so easily.
"..."
I was trembling. It was just before the opening ceremony. I had finally reached this place: the Newcomers' Tournament of the Magics Chevalier. Most people probably assumed it was only natural for me to be standing here.
But they were wrong. I didn't think it was natural at all.
The only reason I was able to stand here was because of Ray, and no one else. Even so, the shaking in my hands would not stop.
I stared intently at my right hand.
Ah... why was I so weak? Getting cold feet before the big stage... such a pitiful girl was the true nature of Amelia Rose.
From a distance, I watched the others running their stalls, looking like they were having so much fun. At first, I had intended to go over and say hello... but... I couldn't move forward.
That scene was far too dazzling for me.
And the moment I tried to take a step, Ariane appeared.
Ariane Algren.
How long had it been since we last met? No, we saw each other every year at parties, but she was always growing. As a member of the Three Great Noble Families, Ariane was constantly moving forward. She was always ascending toward those heights.
But what about me?
While she took flight toward the distant sky, I remained inside my cage.
Encountering her here, at the Magics Chevalier, made it painfully clear. She was the true protagonist of this tournament. I was just... there. A Fool standing still, lost and wandering without spirit or pride.
With those thoughts weighing on me, I turned away from the others.
I had wanted to talk to the adorable Elisa and Clarice, and to Ray in his girl's clothes. I wanted to laugh with them. I'm sure I would have gone around three times just to enjoy every one of their sets. But... I couldn't do it.
"Ray, the next time we meet..."
"Shh! Tiana-chan is right here!"
"Ah... quite right. Honestly, though, I can't see you as anything but a real woman..."
"I suppose so. I'm Lily-chan right now, after all."
"I... I see. I hope to meet the real you one day..."
I didn't know why. My voice shouldn't have been audible over the surrounding clamor, yet I clearly heard the conversation between Ray and Ariane.
Ah... they were dazzling.
They looked so right together. Two people with eyes that sparkled boundlessly. No hesitation, no doubt. There wasn't a hint of shadow in their steps.
In that instant, a sharp, prickling pain ran through my chest.
What was this feeling? Until now, I would have simply been weary of such a situation. But now, it felt as if a different emotion... was taking root in my heart.
However, I didn't want to face it. I had a bad premonition about it.
And so, I fled from that place.
◇
"Amelia. It has been quite a while."
"Ariane..."
It was just before the opening ceremony.
The competitors were waiting to enter... and that was where I happened to run into Ariane. It felt like... it had been a truly long time since we had exchanged proper words like this.
I felt a sense of debt toward her.
In the past, we were close enough to be called best friends.
But at some point, I began to feel a sense of wrongness within myself and started to feel jealous of Ariane’s brilliance. No, was it truly jealousy? I didn't know... but regardless, I had refused to be near her.
It wasn't as if she had done anything wrong.
I simply felt a sense of impatience watching Ariane grow so freely.
That was why... I distanced myself.
I hated being compared to her, and I hated comparing myself to her.
Perhaps sensing my state of mind, Ariane had accepted that distance. Even though we used to play together until the sun went down when we were small, our paths had split.
To think that we were now talking like this, here at the Magics Chevalier... it felt a little strange.
"I met Ray a short while ago."
"Ray?"
"Yes. He said that Amelia was ready. And that you would defeat me... and surely win the tournament."
"I see... Is that so..."
Once again, that sharp pain ran through my chest. But this time, it was slightly different. Something warm was also spreading through my heart.
"Ray is truly outside the norm, isn't he? And did you see? That cross-dressing technique was truly surprising..."
"Haha, well. Yeah... that was certainly a bit impressive."
We talked about Ray. During that time, for some reason, I was able to behave as I normally would. Usually, I would act timidly around Ariane, but today, I could speak to her normally.
"...Amelia, have you changed a little?"
"...You think so?"
"Yes. And you've made... friends, haven't you?"
"Yeah. That's right... Not just Ray, but I've made some close friends. Even I have."
"I see. Is that so?"
I knew it.
Ariane was a kind girl. A very, very kind girl. That was why I had known for a long time that she was worried about me—the girl who always kept everyone at a distance.
But I never let her get close, only locking myself away in my own shell.
Yes. Until now.
However, after meeting Ray... and everyone else, I might have changed, if only a little.
Ariane had been smiling gently, but her expression suddenly shifted into a sharp, serious gaze.
"Amelia. I will not lose."
"...I don't intend to lose, either."
Those words came out naturally.
I was scared. I was trembling. I wanted to run away. Standing before this grand stage, I was... overwhelmed.
But I had overcome those days with Ray, those days of grueling training. I was surely trembling in an unsightly way right now.
I squeezed my fists as hard as I could to endure it.
Yet, at the same time, the words spilled out of me effortlessly.
I didn't want to lose.
I felt that I absolutely could not afford to lose to Ariane.
"If we are to fight... it will be in the finals."
"Yeah..."
"I remember, you know."
"...? What?"
"That we used to compete, you and I."
When we were young, Ariane and I competed often. From footraces to drawing, we vied with each other over even the most trivial things. Back then, I didn't think about who was better or worse; I simply... enjoyed being with Ariane.
"I see... we did do that, didn't we..."
"Actually, the score between us is a draw. So, let us settle it here."
"...Settle it, huh."
"Yes. I will neither run nor hide. So you, too, must strike me head-on. I, Ariane Algren, will take everything you have and defeat you."
She declared it loftily.
Ah... how, how kind she was.
At the same time, I felt like such a small existence. Because I could understand Ariane's true feelings, I could also understand my own insignificance.
If it were the old me, I would have lost my nerve right here. I would have been crushed by her greatness and the beauty of her heart.
But the current me... could squeeze it out. Because I now had the courage, the heart that Ray gave me—
"Ariane. Let's meet in the finals. I will absolutely stand at the top of this Magics Chevalier."
"Hehe... that's a good look in your eyes. Amelia, I'll be waiting."
With that, we shook hands once more.
It was warm.
How long had it been since I last touched Ariane?
I remembered. Those days of our childhood.
We had been walking separate paths. No, I was the one who had simply run away. But Ariane had been waiting for me all along.
Believing that I would surely come back someday.
Ah... I really can't beat her... I thought as I looked into her eyes.
We had both grown.
Our bodies were nearly those of adults. And our hearts, too, were maturing.
Even so, there was one thing that remained unchanged.
The fact that Ariane and I were rivals.
And so, we took our steps toward the opening ceremony venue. Amidst the thunderous cheers, the competitors marched forward.
Her figure, as she was swallowed by the light, was more radiant than anyone else's.
If possible, I too... want to become that light.
That was what I prayed for.