After school. I stood up, ready to go explore some new territory in the form of light novels. I’d spent so long unable to think about anything but Natsukawa that I’d missed out on a mountain of new releases. I figured I’d head home and read while stuffing my face with the meat buns Nee-chan bought. Indulgence is life.
"He-Hey..."
"Whoops... What is it?"
The exact moment I was about to head out, someone stopped me. I reflexively turned around, thinking it was Natsukawa. I’d gone so long without her calling my name that I just assumed she must be talking to me. Crap, I totally misread that! I thought, but it turned out Natsukawa really had been the one to stop me. I was just glad I hadn't made an embarrassing blunder out loud.
"Uh, Natsukawa? What’s up? You’re acting pretty flustered."
"I-I’m not flustered at all!"
"Oh..."
She’d gone out of her way to call out and approach me when I was trying to leave quickly. I thought there was a decent amount of distance between us... Was it my imagination? Did she just warp? Did you want to see me that badly? No, sorry, don’t get mad.
"Y-You... are you really not coming?"
"Coming where...? Huh? What are you—"
"What’s this? Is the final homeroom over here finished as well?"
"Huh...?"
A low, clear voice suddenly rang out. It was low, but not a man's; it was a woman’s dignified voice. That was exactly why it was easier to hear than anyone else's.
"Ky-ah, Rin-sama...!?"
Ashida let out a cry of delight at the appearance of such a big name.
The Disciplinary Committee President, Shinomiya Rin-senpai, was peeking into the classroom from the hallway. Without letting her gaze wander, she made eye contact with me as soon as she entered. Her expression softened—wait, it softened?! Could you please just swap personalities with my sister right now?
Wait, what was this? Two beautiful girls coming to see me the moment school let out? What kind of light novel protagonist was I? My heart was pounding like crazy. Wh-Which one should I choose?! What do you think, Ashida?!
"...I don't really get it, but I can tell Sajocchi is thinking about something stupid."
"Could you please stop with the cold-blooded analysis?"
You damn database-type girl...! Seeing right through the heart of a boy starved for youth is nothing short of cruel! I really am only thinking about stupid things, so could you please stop?!
"Hello, everyone. I’m sure your long day has finally come to an end, but do you mind if I borrow Sajou for a moment?"
"By all means, please, go ahead!! Boil him, grill him, or expose him on social media!"
"Hey, Ashida, you brat."
That third option sounded way more cruel than the first two. Even if you exposed me on social media, I wouldn't even be Instagrammable. Eh? You mean Twitter? What are you going to do if I go viral, you woman! I need to fix my hair...!
While I was messing around and trying my best not to meet Shinomiya-senpai's eyes, I locked eyes with Natsukawa, whom I’d been talking to just a moment ago.
"Ah, sorry, Natsukawa. What were we saying?"
"I-It's nothing! Just go already!"
"Yes! Understood!"
"Y-You two have a mysterious relationship..."
"Don't we?" I thought as I looked at Shinomiya-senpai, only for her to look back at me with a troubled expression. I’m sorry, I’m just in a good mood today and my energy is high... Please bear with me a little longer—actually, you don't have to, so can I just go home? I have a feeling this is going to be a pain.
In the first place, what business did Shinomiya-senpai have with me? The matter with Inatomi-senpai should have been settled, and I didn't think she'd have anything else to discuss...
"Let's change locations."
"...?"
"..."
Natsukawa and Ashida watched my back with lonely expressions as I was led out of the classroom (*delusion).
"—So, we’re here?"
"Yes, here."
The Student Guidance Room. It was a place like a solitary confinement cell, used for lecturing or penalizing students who disturbed the school's discipline. It was also a place that was freely accessible to students who possessed certain authority.
"Honestly, I really hate being seen by other students and teachers..."
"Heh, don't worry about the chirping of the masses."
"The chirping."
Her word choice while giving me a sidelong glance was just too cool. I wondered if this person would have a hard time finding a man cooler than herself. Also, she wasn't very chummy with the teachers, which was surprising... I thought the Disciplinary Committee would be more obedient to the faculty.
"So, what is it you want?"
"First, let me thank you. Thanks to your advice, I've been able to follow up with Yuyu effectively. I've realized that being as close as possible isn't always the answer."
"Is that so? Those were just my subjective thoughts, so I didn't know if they'd work, but I'm glad if they helped you encourage her."
"Yes, it was a big help. You have the power to support people."
"No, that's not true."
That was quite the high evaluation. I didn't say it with that much passion... You never know what's going to be useful to someone.
Even so, did Inatomi-senpai have something happen to make her feel down again? She certainly gave off the impression of being fragile, so when a girl who seemed like a "healing-type" got like that, I couldn't help but worry. It made me want to give her something sweet. Japanese sweets. Maybe wagashi.
"—That's exactly why I've found myself even more unable to understand you."
"............Excuse me?"
True to her name, she leaned in close, peering into my eyes with her own dignified ones. The sudden movement forced me to reflexively look away and lean back. Ow, I hit my back... isn't this room way too small? It really is a solitary cell.
"Well, you see. It's about Yuyu... she was depressed, thinking she hadn't been able to get you to understand her."
"Eh? ...Haha, what are you talking about? It was about 'dispelling her aversion to male students,' right? I think that's a fine goal."
"I think so too. But that's not the point of the conversation."
"No, wait..."
Shinomiya-senpai leaned her face in again, peering into the depths of my eyes. With her face pressed so close, I had no escape and could only look away. What was this? It felt like the atmosphere right before getting a shot at the hospital. Is it not over yet?
"Hmm... Sajou."
"Y-Yes?"
"I'm interested in your true feelings."
"No, it's not like I'm lying..."
"Back then, it was a matter between you and Yuyu, so I didn't notice. But I can tell now. Your eyes right now are different from the ones you had when you gave me that advice."
".........That's..."
...What was it with everyone? Why was everyone so obsessed with my eyes? They looked like normal eyes no matter how you sliced it. I was just trying not to cause any friction for the sake of my own peace. Why did I have to be interrogated as if I were being blamed for it? Was she saying I couldn't read the room? Usually, people are happy when someone agrees with what they're saying. That's how I let things slide. And yet, everyone’s been so noisy about it lately.
Perhaps because the frustration had been building up, I let my true feelings slip out.
"—I was just fed up with Inatomi-senpai's common-sense-defying level of cowardice."
"...Don't you think Yuyu has a past that caused that?"
"I do. But if you let that past chain you down while you're supposedly trying to dispel an aversion to men, you'll never move forward, will you?"
".........Please continue."
I couldn't help but sound harsh toward Inatomi-senpai. Every time I did, Shinomiya-senpai's eyebrow would twitch, but she didn't seem to intend to argue with me.
"I don't think Inatomi-senpai apologized to me just for my sake. It was because she was disgusted with herself for letting her trauma waste someone's kindness. That's why I thought she wanted to settle the score for what happened by apologizing to me."
"Are you dissatisfied with that?"
"No. In fact, I praise her for it. The problem is what happened after. Inatomi-senpai used that incident as a stepping stone and said something to the effect that she was putting in effort right now to change. That she was trying to get better."
"........."
I could feel my heart turning cold. The fearsome Disciplinary Committee President looked down at me as I spoke, while I found myself shrinking back. I was currently speaking ill of her best friend. Perhaps because I’d stopped caring, I suddenly found that I didn't mind Shinomiya-senpai's sharp gaze anymore.
"—But if that were really the case, Inatomi-senpai shouldn't have brought you along, Shinomiya-senpai."
"...!"
Inatomi-senpai's aversion to men. She had taken a step away from overcoming it by running away from me, and she was supposed to return to neutral by apologizing. But bringing along an ally like Shinomiya-senpai meant that the initial fear and the subsequent courage weren't balanced. Far from moving forward, she was still half a step back.
"I just thought, what is this person even talking about? That's all."
".........I see."
Thinking about it logically, I believed what I was saying was correct. However, if you looked at it with a normal person's yardstick, the story changed.
I was probably the one who was wrong. There was no way every high schooler was acting with such deep, calculated thought. I had just arbitrarily held her in high regard because she was a member of the Disciplinary Committee and assumed she had high aspirations. That was why I ended up disappointed.
"You're quite severe."
"Not really. I think Inatomi-senpai is adorable as a mascot."
"I agree. In fact, that's almost the only way I see her."
Wait, really? How is that okay? I think it would be fine to treat her a bit more like a proper member of the Disciplinary Committee. You're best friends, aren't you?
"But I see... To me, she's just a cute junior, but you want her to be reliable as a senior..."
"Ah, that might be part of it. If she were the same age or younger, I might not have cared about those details."
"I see..."
When I offered my opinion, Shinomiya-senpai smiled, her eyebrows slanted in a troubled way. Inatomi-senpai had a blind sort of cuteness to her, though not as much as Natsukawa. Perhaps the words from someone who was her junior's junior had been a bit of an eye-opener.
"You really care about Inatomi-senpai, don't you, Senpai?"
"That's true, but it's not just her. Sajou, you're already a junior I'm keeping an eye on."
"Eh? Am I being targeted by the Disciplinary Committee President?"
"Hey, saying it like that hurts my feelings."
Because that's not normal. What kind of first-year has his face and name remembered by both the Student Council and the Disciplinary Committee? It's not normal—someone help me.
In the end, Shinomiya-senpai didn't scold me for my biting attitude. That said, she must have had her own thoughts on the matter; when I quickly left the Student Guidance Room and looked back, I saw her profile as she locked the door with a contemplative expression.
I decided to act as if I hadn't seen anything.
Was it an escape, or was it consideration?