"Wait, wait a minute! Why is the name of someone who didn't even enter—no, that’s not it! This is a Miss Contest, right!? Why is Takanashi-kun's name on the list!?"
Minamin was in a state of sheer panic, reeling from a situation so absurd it was practically unprecedented.
As for me, I was facing a development so far beyond my expectations that I didn't even know where to start. Someone, please explain this!
"Um..."
"C-Could it be... Takanashi-kun was actually... a girl all along!?" Tachikawa-san blurted out.
"Whaaaaaat!?"
For some reason, everyone—myself included—reacted with the exact same shock to her bombshell. I had no idea why we all played along, not even a little bit, but the impulse to react was just too strong... Wait, no, that’s wrong!
"Why would you even go there!?" I protested.
"Ahaha... sorry, it just slipped out."
"I wouldn't mind at all if Kazunari were a crossdressing boy," Hanako-san interjected. "It wouldn't change how much I dote on him."
"Wait, what!?"
"Um, Hanako-san? Takanashi-kun has been a boy from the very beginning, hasn't he?" Marina-san asked, sounding confused.
"Not exactly. You see, a crossdressing boy is—"
"Stop right there, Hanako-san. Don't go any further."
Even if it was Hanako-san, I couldn't stand by and watch her feed such off-color jokes to the pure-hearted Marina-san. Even God says that’s a sin.
"Marina-san, Kazunari is a man through and through."
"Y-Yeah, that makes sense. He's a boy, right?"
Despite her head-tilting confusion at the weird vibe of the conversation, Marina-san seemed to accept it for now. Honestly... Hanako-san really was a handful. Wait, what were we even talking about?
"Um... Fukazawa-sa—"
"Minamin!"
"Minamin-san, are those results for real?" Sara-san asked.
"I... What’s the word, Prep Committee!?" Minamin cried out, looking up at the sky as if questioning some higher power.
I watched to see if there would be any response. After a few moments, the screen suddenly flickered and changed.
It is a fact, so we are equally perplexed. We believe it is the result of write-in votes from the female audience.
The female vote?
"I see, so that's what happened..."
"Oh boy, Takanashi-kun's stock has certainly skyrocketed."
"Well, Takanashi-kun did work really hard today..."
In other words, the events of the day had earned me some kind of positive recognition from the girls, and that had manifested in this result? Well, being thought of favorably was honestly flattering, but did that really justify me taking second place in a beauty pageant for women?
"Alright! A total success!"
"Nyahaha, this turned out to be quite the show."
"You did it, Takanashi-kun!"
"Congrats on the runner-up spot!"
"Takanashi-kun, you should come by our classroom sometime..."
"...Mana, you've got to be kidding."
"S-Shut up! I didn't mean it like that!"
"Well, after seeing that performance, it's only natural for an attribute-holder..."
"...You too!?"
Judging by the reactions around me, this was definitely a massive block vote from the girls. And for the record, I had no intention of wandering into a third-year classroom where I didn't know anyone, so I’d have to pass on that invitation.
"Hmm... what do we do about this, Prep Committee!?"
Put it on hold for now and move the program along.
"On hold? Where's the President!?"
He’s in a state of total shock from the string of disasters. He's gone completely blank.
"Well, that’s just great... understood."
A conclusion had been reached—or rather, the problem had simply been pushed down the line. But was that really okay? Not only was a non-entrant taking the runner-up spot, but I was a guy!
"...So that’s how it is. Is that acceptable to you, Satsukawa-san?"
"Acceptable or not, if the Prep Committee has made their decision, I have no choice but to follow it, do I?"
"W-Well, that’s true, but... um, Satsukawa-san?"
"...What is it?"
"No... it's just... you look a little angry... oh, maybe..."
"...I'm not particularly angry, though?"
"Hieee! S-Sorry! It's nothing, I swear!!"
Minamin practically withered under the mysterious pressure Sara-san was radiating. She looked like she was physically shrinking. I’d noticed Sara-san’s stiff expression too... though it didn't look like anger to me so much as a pout.
"Mufufu... Sara Satsukawa is so cute."
"She’s been acting composed lately, but Sara has always been the jealous type," Natsumi commented. "She used to get jealous even over me... Honestly, she loses her character so easily whenever it involves Takanashi-kun."
"It can't be helped," Eri added. "Sara is a woman, after all. Thinking about her fiancé being popular with other girls... her heart couldn't possibly be at peace."
"...Kazunari, what’s with the long face?"
"Nothing, it's just..."
They say being the target of jealousy is a flattering thing, but for the one actually feeling the jealousy, it's miserable. I knew that better than anyone; I’d spent plenty of time feeling bitter about Sara-san being constantly pursued by other guys. It would be a lie to say that my decision to make the proposal public didn't involve some desire to put a stop to that.
Even if it was impossible for the tables to truly turn, when I thought about Sara-san's feelings, I couldn't just sit here and be happy about her being jealous.
"Fufu... Takanashi-san really is earnest, isn't he?" Eririn remarked.
"That is Kazunari's best trait," Hanako-san agreed.
"Wait... Takanashi-kun hasn't even said anything yet... Could it be?"
"It’s exactly what you think," Natsumi replied. "Hanako-san and Eririn already know what Takanashi-kun was thinking. I have a pretty good idea myself."
"Setting aside Hanako-san, has Nishikawa-san finally become a Takanashi-kun Meister too!?"
"No, it's just a vague feeling for me. I’m no match for Sara or Hanako-san."
"This is a passive skill inherent to an older sister," Hanako-san stated. "Nothing to be surprised about."
"No... that’s definitely not a thing for normal siblings, you know?" I muttered.
Normal or not, those two were so sharp at reading my mind it was terrifying.
"S-So, what about the rest of you...?" Minamin asked the other contestants.
They all gave wry smiles and nodded—except for the Stuck-up Woman. By the standards of a majority vote, the matter was settled. Which meant that in a Miss Contest meant for women, I, a man, was officially the runner-up.
"Sigh... I've never heard of a Miss Contest like this. But in a way, I guess it’ll go down in history... Alright, I’m throwing caution to the wind! Let's just do this!!"
Applause erupted from the audience—mostly from the rowdy girls—showing a mix of support and sympathy for Minamin’s desperate resolve. The reality of me being the runner-up was becoming more solid by the second. I supposed I should follow Minamin’s lead and just steel myself.
"Thank you for waiting! It is finally time to announce the winner! This Miss Contest has been an unprecedented, chaotic struggle... Who will take the crown? We won't know for sure until the very end! Here we go!"
"...Struggle or not, my wife's victory was a predetermined harmony," Hanako-san whispered.
"Hanako-san, shush!"
"Even Minamin knows that. She’s just saying it for the show."
A drumroll blared from the speakers, and even more spotlights than before swept across the stage. Even though it wasn't even evening yet, the sun sets early in autumn, and the dimmed stage lights created a dramatic atmosphere. It felt like every single light was part of a production designed to make Sara-san shine.
"The 32nd Rinka Festival Miss Contest! The glorious winner is..."
We weren't the only ones who knew the likely result, yet the entire audience watched the stage with bated breath. The tension in the air was palpable.
Minamin threw her head back with a grand flourish!
"Entry No. 9! Sara Satsukawa!"
The crowd erupted into a roar. Confetti burst into the air with loud pops, catching the glare of the spotlights and sparkling like falling stars. The speakers blared a triumphant fanfare.
And there stood Sara-san.
Even if she had thought of the contest as a joke, the fact of her victory seemed to touch her. She wore a smile that was both happy and bashful... and she was looking straight at me.
"Congratulations! As expected, Satsukawa-san was unbeatable! Even with the male audience decimated, her victory was absolute! Truly incredible!"
"Thank you very much. Honestly, I didn't think I would win," Sara-san replied.
"Ah, by the way, your score was nearly neck-and-neck with Mayumi-san! The first and second screenings were incredibly close!"
"I see. For me, though, I’m just satisfied that I beat my mother in the cooking judging."
"Oh, really!? Now that you mention it, the passion in that segment did feel different! Now, normally we would move to the winner's interview... but we still have a situation... oh!?"
Minamin turned around to check something, and at that exact moment, the "Results Announcement" text on the screen vanished, replaced by a bold "Winner: Sara Satsukawa."
And right below it, in slightly smaller text, was my name: "Runner-up: Kazunari Takanashi." Give me a break!
"Well, it looks like Takanashi-kun’s runner-up status is official! Takanashi-kun, come back up to the stage!"
"Wait, what!?"
I was still reeling. Is this really okay? If a guy takes a prize in a Miss Contest, doesn't that undermine the whole point of the event?
"Takanashi-kun! Get up there!"
"Go on, your wife is waiting!"
"A husband-and-wife one-two finish!"
"I wish you two the best!"
The voices from the crowd were a mix of genuine warmth and playful teasing. I could hear heavy applause from the back. It felt like the entire room was pushing me toward the stage... or just enjoying the chaos. Either way, the program wasn't going to move forward until I showed my face.
"Hmm, looks like we need one more little push! Mufufu... come on, Satsukawa-san, call your husband!"
"Eh!? Kazunari-sa—"
"That's not it! You called him 'Darling' earlier, didn't you!?"
"Um... A-Darling, please... come here..."
A high-pitched, deafening scream of delight erupted from the crowd, sounding like a concert for a world-famous idol group.
"She said 'Darling' again!?"
"Fooo! They aren't just lovers! They're basically a married couple already!"
"Look how red she is!"
"Kyaaaaa! Just explode already!"
"Husband! Your wife is calling!"
"I can live off this moment alone for a month!"
"The rom-com energy coming from Satsukawa-san is off the charts!"
"Kazunari, you should go," Hanako-san said. "The commotion won't stop until you do."
"Ugh... I guess you're right."
"This is the result of the mess you and Sara made, so just man up and go!" Natsumi added.
"U-Understood!"
I still had doubts about the whole thing, but one thing was certain: if I stayed here, Sara-san would be stuck in that embarrassing spotlight alone. I didn't have time to hesitate. I’d already proposed and kissed her in front of everyone; there was no reason to get cold feet over this.
"I'm going."
"Good luck!"
"Do your best!"
"Fight!"
Just like when I’d crashed the stage for the proposal, I climbed the central stairs with everyone’s cheers at my back. At the top, Minamin was wearing a mischievous grin, and the other contestants were laughing too. I took my place right next to Sara-san, near the center of the stage.
"Well, well! Welcome, Takanashi-kun! Once again, congrats on the runner-up spot!"
More applause followed, carrying a weight of meaning I couldn't quite decipher. I wasn't sure how to react. Being happy about it felt weird, but getting angry didn't feel right either. Should I laugh? Look annoyed? I had no clue.
"Um, are you sure about this?" I asked.
"It’s a bit late for that. The contestants and the audience are on board, and the Prep Committee seems to have given up. What’s the harm?"
"But I'm a man—"
"Exactly," Sara-san interrupted. "I cannot overlook awarding a prize for women to Kazunari-san!"
"Even if you say that... it’s a Miss Contest, so that’s naturally—"
"Then just call it a Best Couple Award!" a voice shouted from the crowd.
Our eyes all turned toward the source. A Best Couple Award? That would be much better than being the runner-up of a Miss Contest, even if it had nothing to do with the original competition.
"If things are this messed up anyway, who cares if it's a Miss Contest or not!?"
"Yeah! It doesn't matter!"
"Then it’s perfectly fine for Takanashi-kun to win!"
The suggestion caught fire, spreading through the crowd like a wave.
"W-W-Wait a minute! I cannot allow this!"
A figure came stomping out from the wings with a series of loud thuds—it was the President, unfortunately revived. It made sense that he’d panic; if the award itself was changed, the identity of his "Miss Contest" committee would crumble.
"The contestants here fought for the top spot among women on the stage of the 'Miss Contest'! Allowing a non-entrant—a boy, no less—to be included is simply out of the question! Don't you agree, contestants!? Your hard work will be for nothing if—"
"Um... I was just in it for the fun, so I don't really mind?" one contestant said.
"Me neither! I knew I couldn't beat Satsukawa-san anyway. Participating was the important part!"
"Exactly! At this point, changing the name of the prize is a minor detail!"
"Wait!? Everyone!?"
Abandoned by the contestants he’d relied on as his last hope, the President was literally surrounded by enemies. To make matters worse, the Stuck-up Woman was in a state of complete resignation, and as for Sara-san...
"I couldn't care less about the results of the Miss Contest," she said coldly. "Now that I have achieved my goal for participating, I have no use for the title of winner. More importantly... I absolutely will not permit Kazunari-san, a man, to be saddled with a title like 'Miss Contest Runner-up'!"
"Hieee!?"
The moment the topic shifted to me, Sara-san’s aura expanded violently, crushing the President’s spirit. Her gaze was more than a glare; it was a sharp, piercing strike that left him trembling like a frightened child.
"And that," Minamin whispered, "is checkmate."
It sounded like the final bell.
"All right! In that case... we will now hold the ceremony for the Best Couple Grand Prize!"
The crowd went wild.
And so, instead of the Miss Contest winner and runner-up... we ended up taking the spotlight as the winners of the Best Couple Grand Prize.