The expression on Yamakawa’s face as he watched me seemed to carry a different weight than usual. I didn't even have to think about the reason; he was clearly looking for a chance to have "that talk."
However… his timing couldn't have been worse.
Hanako-san was visibly in a foul mood thanks to the idiots making a racket right in front of her. It didn't take much imagination to guess what would happen if Yamakawa—who she likely lumped into the same category as the others—tried to strike up a conversation now.
"…What is it?" she asked coldly.
"No… well…"
"I believe I told you before. If you don't actually have business with me, don't talk to me every single time."
That was harsh.
Hanako-san spoke with blunt rejection, her words calculated to push him away. She clearly wanted nothing to do with him.
"N-No, I do have business!! It’s something serious!! There’s no time right now, so I want you to give me a moment during the next break!!"
Faced with an even colder reception than usual, Yamakawa rushed to get his point across, his voice tinged with a hint of desperation.
I was used to seeing Hanako-san take a dismissive stance toward him, but this might have been the first time she had been quite this sharp.
"Can’t you just say it here?"
"I’d… I'd prefer if it were just the two of us…"
Once he went that far, anyone who wasn't incredibly dense would realize he was basically announcing his intent to confess.
But since Hanako-san was already well aware of his feelings, she didn't show the slightest reaction. If anything, her eyes grew even colder as she spared him a glance and let out a small sigh.
"I’ll be blunt. I have no interest in any man besides Kazunari. And I have no intention of speaking with any man besides Kazunari in private."
Her words were an explicit, absolute rejection. Being told something like that, even a positive thinker like Yamakawa would have to understand that his chances were non-existent.
I’m sure having me used as the point of comparison only made his feelings more complicated.
Even though Yamakawa knew she didn't have romantic feelings for me, Hanako-san remained stubbornly fixated on my existence.
"…I know that. I know all of it. But I still want to talk to you."
This was painful to watch.
Following our conversation on Sunday, Yamakawa understood that there was no hope for him and knew exactly what her answer would be.
And yet, taking all that into account, he was still pleading for a moment of her time. Was he planning to confess just to get it over with, or did he want to apologize for what he’d realized on Sunday… or perhaps both?
"…Fine. I’ll listen."
"Wait, really!?"
The response surprised me just as much as it did Yamakawa.
Knowing Hanako-san’s usual temperament, I’d assumed there was a high probability she would just end the conversation right there.
"I don't have a deep reason for it. I’m just returning the favor from earlier."
A favor?
What was she talking about?
As far as I could tell, Hanako-san hadn't even taken part in the earlier conversation. She shouldn't have owed Yamakawa anything; in fact, they shouldn't have had any contact at all today.
If anything, I was the one who owed him a favor for stepping in to handle the other boys…
Wait, could it be…?
"Hanako-san, do you mean…?"
"Don't worry about it, Kazunari. Just let me act like a big sister for once, okay?"
Just as I’d suspected.
Hanako-san was trying to repay the debt Yamakawa had earned from me. I wasn't sure if that was the only reason, but she was claiming it was the direct one.
Of course, I was happy that she cared about me that much. There was no way her feelings wouldn't move me.
But at the same time, I absolutely didn't want to be the reason she forced a burden upon herself.
And yet…
Pat, pat…
Hanako-san reached out and gently stroked my head, once, twice, three times.
She wore a soft smile, looking at me with a tender gaze that was the polar opposite of the one she’d given Yamakawa.
Looking at her expression, I found myself unable to say a word.
Her gentle eyes wouldn't let me protest.
"Takanashi…"
Yamakawa watched the two of us with a complicated expression. When he muttered my name, I couldn't tell if he was calling out to me or just whispering to himself.
"Would you… would you come along for the talk too?"
"I… Sure. I will."
Is that really okay? I swallowed the question. Given Yamakawa's resolve, there was only one reason he’d want me there. Asking "why" would have just been tactless.
Besides, if Hanako-san was going to move for my sake, I couldn't forgive myself if I just stood by and did nothing. I didn't plan to meddle, but I at least intended to step in if things went sideways.
"Thanks! I'll see you guys during the next break then!"
Behaving with forced cheerfulness, Yamakawa retreated to his own seat.
I just hoped he could reach a conclusion he could live with…
……………
………
…
Morning Homeroom.
"Tomorrow after school is the cooking class. Unless you have a special reason, everyone is expected to participate."
The announcement from the Class Representative—which I had delegated to him—was about the event finally happening tomorrow.
Originally, there was a plan to limit it to the Person in Charge of Cooking, but the classmates had requested it be changed to full participation. Of course, that was before the incident on Saturday, so I’d been worried about how the boys would react now.
"So, what are we doing?"
"Going, obviously. This is different."
"Exactly. Satsukawa-senpai's cooking class is a rare event."
"I already bragged about it to the guys in other classes. They were crying tears of blood, lol."
"But… Satsukawa-senpai is getting married to Takanashi, right?"
"""DON'T REMIND UUUUUUS!!!!"""
"I can't tell if they're idiots or just resilient…"
"They're definitely idiots."
"But it’s true that it’s a rare event. I mean, it’s the Satsukawa-senpai!"
"Seriously, I'm so grateful to Takanashi-kun."
Apparently, the boys' motivation to participate remained unshaken.
While that was a good thing for the class project, their logic did give me pause.
I guess Kawamura's theory was correct: "They’ve given up on their romantic feelings, but they can't throw away their admiration."
But if that was the case, did it mean I could finally stop worrying about people hitting on Sara?
If so, I suppose I should just be glad things weren't worse…
……………
………
…
The end of first period, and the start of the break.
We didn't have much time, so I quickly gathered Yamakawa and Hanako-san and headed straight for the designated landing.
Most of the classrooms on the floor above this spot were only used after school, making it a hidden gem where almost no one passed by during the day.
"Thanks for coming, you two."
"…We don't have much time. Talk," Hanako-san prompted immediately.
She wasn't necessarily in a hurry; she just wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible.
"…Right. First, I want to apologize for everything I've done up until now."
"…Huh?"
The apology clearly caught Hanako-san off guard.
Given the situation, she probably never expected him to start with that. If I hadn't talked to him on Sunday, I’m sure I would have had the same reaction.
In that regard, Hanako-san’s confusion was perfectly valid.
"I’ve only been thinking about myself. You probably know this, but I seriously fell in love with Hanasaki-san at first sight. That’s why I was so desperate to get close to you. I didn't realize I was being a nuisance. Or rather, I couldn't let myself see it. I’m sorry."
Yamakawa finally reached the heart of the matter.
Confession and apology—it seemed he needed both to settle things within himself. However, looking at his face, it was clear the apology was the priority. There was no hint of shyness; he just looked genuinely, deeply sorry.
"…I see. I don't know what changed your mind so suddenly, but just noticing that makes you slightly better than those other guys."
Perhaps because Yamakawa had placed so much emphasis on the apology, Hanako-san’s attitude seemed to soften—if only by a fraction.
She only said he was "better," and there was no sign of her feelings changing beyond that. She’d merely returned to her usual level of bluntness.
"I really am sorry. To be honest, though, I didn't think I was hated that much."
"…Since we're here, I'll be clear. I hate 'love at first sight.' It’s just judging someone by their looks without seeing who they really are. Hitting on someone based on that is so frivolous that it’s not even worth my time."
Even if he’d already known it, hearing it directly from the source must have been a devastating blow.
Hanako-san spoke with absolute loathing, casting the words aside as if they were something repulsive.
Her frozen gaze seemed to pierce right through Yamakawa, silently adding, And that includes you.
"…Y-Yeah… You’re right. I definitely fell for you because Hanasaki-san’s looks were exactly my type. I won't make excuses for that."
Even if he’d been prepared for it, having his feelings dismissed so ruthlessly had to be a shock.
"…But I really did want to get to know you. I wanted you to tell me about yourself. That’s why I was so desperate to get close. And I was impatient because you were only ever close with Takanashi."
"…Now that you mention it, I was too put off by how obvious you were to notice, but I don't think you ever actually said those words to me directly."
He was right. I’d seen him desperately trying to win her over countless times, but I didn't recall Yamakawa ever putting his feelings into actual words.
At least, not until today.
"I wasn't planning on just confessing out of the blue without knowing anything about you. I wanted to wait until we were actually close. It started with your looks, but I believe that a love starting from there can still be the real thing."
Under normal circumstances, I would have agreed with him.
Even if it starts with physical attraction, if you build a real relationship before confessing, it isn't frivolous.
But in reality, Yamakawa had skipped all those steps. When it came to Hanako-san, he had already reached a point where there was no turning back.
"I see… I suppose so."
I wondered what Hanako-san was thinking.
Like me, did she find some merit in his words?
She didn't immediately shoot him down. Instead, she looked away from Yamakawa and closed her eyes, lost in thought.
"I’ll say it again. I wanted to get to know Hanasaki-san properly and then confess. But I couldn't get close to you, and I ended up doing things you hated. I’m truly sorry for that."
While Hanako-san remained silent, Yamakawa bowed his head deeply.
I didn't know how she truly felt about the apology, but the air of sharp rejection and hostility had definitely vanished.
"…Fine. I accept your apology. I’m sure there were parts where I overreacted as well."
It seemed Hanako-san had found something she could understand.
Even within a concept she loathed, she’d managed to find a piece she could calmly accept. She wasn't denying everything outright anymore; she had the psychological breathing room to think flexibly. It was another sign of how much she had grown.
"Thanks! Then… this is the last thing."
The last thing—the formal confession.
Yamakawa seemed relieved by her response, and his tone returned to its usual lightness. But his expression remained tense. No matter how much he expected the rejection, a confession was still a nerve-wracking thing.
"Hanasaki-san… ever since the day we met, I've loved you. I've never liked anyone this much before. I know you hate love at first sight, but I’m confident I can be serious enough to overcome that. If you can't see me as a boyfriend yet, I’m fine starting as friends with that in mind. Please!!"
Yamakawa bowed deeply and reached his hand straight out toward her.
Now, all that was left was for Hanako-san to give her answer.
…And yet, despite it not being about me, why was I so tense?
Was it because it involved Hanako-san? Or because Yamakawa was my friend?
No, I’d been in a similar spot with Yuji and Natsumi-senpai. This felt different.
What was the difference? Why did I feel this sense of anxiety and impatience?
I couldn't quite put my finger on it.
And then…
Hanako-san looked Yamakawa directly in the eyes. Her expression didn't change. She was as stoic and detached as ever.
And that was her answer.
"I'll give you my answer now. I’m sorry, but I can't date you. I can't see you in that way, and some part of me still feels uncomfortable with you. So it will be impossible in the future too."
It was a classic Hanako-san rejection: direct, blunt, and absolute.
Since I’d seen this coming from a mile away, I wasn't surprised by the result.
I wasn't surprised, and yet…
I felt an inexplicable sense of dread, like a weight in my chest I couldn't describe.
What was wrong with me?
"Yeah… I figured. I knew, but… I guess it's really a no. I thought so…"
Yamakawa had known too. Or at least, he’d told himself he did.
But even with all that preparation, the shock of being rejected to his face was clearly massive. He wasn't crying, but he looked utterly heartbroken.
"Hey… just out of curiosity. If… if I were somehow more than Takanashi…"
"That’s impossible. Kazunari is a unique and irreplaceable person to me. No one can ever be more than him. No one can even stand on the same level."
"Ah…"
Hanako-san cut him off ruthlessly. Yamakawa probably hadn't even been serious, but because my name was involved, her denial was even more decisive than before.
"In the first place, there’s no point in comparing anyone to him. Kazunari is my younger brother, not a lover. Even if someone stood beside him or surpassed him, it wouldn't mean they could become my lover."
That one sentence clarified everything for me.
Hanako-san firmly viewed our relationship as siblings, not romance.
It wasn't something I needed to dwell on now, but knowing that allowed me to continue my relationship with her with a sense of security.
"…Though, I suppose I couldn't date anyone who isn't at least on equal footing with Kazunari."
Well…
Personally, I wouldn't want to entrust Hanako-san to anyone I deemed inferior either.
That wasn't to say I thought Yamakawa was "below" me. That was for Hanako-san to decide, not me.
"I see…"
The result was a total rejection across the board.
Yamakawa looked completely crushed, but there was nothing I could do or say to change that.
"But… thank you."
Suddenly, Hanako-san spoke a word of gratitude. Not only that, a small smile touched her lips. She had never smiled at him before, making this a truly monumental moment.
Yamakawa looked stunned, captivated by the sight.
"…Hanasaki-san?"
"I’ve never had a boy confess to me before. This was the first time someone told me they loved me. And honestly… I found it made me happy. I was able to feel that way."
So that was it.
This was indeed her first formal confession. And while I was close to her, I had never used the word "love."
I felt "like" for her as a best friend, but not "love" as a romantic interest.
For the first time in her life, someone had aimed that specific affection at her. She had experienced being wanted, and she had realized that she appreciated it.
"So, thank you. Thank you for loving me. And I’m sorry. I can't date you, Yamakawa-kun. I just don't see you that way."
She called him "Yamakawa-kun" for the very first time.
It might have just been out of politeness, but the change was still staggering.
Her voice didn't sound particularly affectionate, but compared to before, it was a world of difference. If things had been different from the start, maybe they could have reached a different ending.
But this was it. The final answer had been given: Yamakawa was, at best, a friend.
There was nothing beyond that.
Yamakawa clearly realized it too. He looked as though he might burst into tears at any moment.
And seeing his expression…
I felt that "something" inside me flare up again.
It was a wave of negative emotion. The indescribable unease I’d been feeling since earlier was reaching a peak.
"I get it. Sorry, Hanasaki-san, for wasting your time. Hey… I don't mean to push my luck, but can I at least talk to you once in a while from now on…?"
"We're classmates, so that much is fine. But don't get any ideas. If you can promise that, then I suppose we can be normal friends…"
"Really!? I'm happy with just that! Then I'll at least aim for the same level as Takanashi—"
"I told you that was useless. Such a person will never exist. No one can ever be what Kazunari is to me."
"Ugh… you’re too strict…"
I couldn't tell if he’d actually moved on or was just putting on a brave face, but Yamakawa was already trying to act like his usual self. Hanako-san seemed to sense it, matching his tone with her own usual attitude.
The matter was settled.
I could genuinely say I was glad that Hanako-san had been able to feel happiness from someone’s affection.
And Yamakawa was incredibly strong.
Even after being prepared for it, having his feelings flatly rejected had to hurt, yet he was already trying to overcome it. He was moving forward, content to just be her friend.
If I were in his shoes, could I have done the same?
I had only ever confessed to Sara. I didn't know what it felt like to be rejected.
But if Sara had said no to me… I don't think I could have acted like him.
Ah…………
I see. I finally understood.
I understood why I’d been feeling that "something."
Yamakawa’s heartbreak…
Was a glimpse into a possibility that could have been mine.
If I hadn't met Sara, if I hadn't become her lover—I was seeing a shadow of what might have happened to me.
It was just a "what if," a meaningless hypothetical.
But the fact remained: because Yamakawa had stumbled at the first step, it had led to an irreversible result.
That meant that if I had made a mistake, if I had misplaced just a single button in our relationship, there was a future where Sara and I never became what we are today.
I had thought about it before, of course. But since it wasn't my reality, I’d never truly felt it.
But now, seeing Yamakawa, I had glimpsed it. Even knowing it was pointless, I felt a surge of anxiety.
And because of that…
I realized all over again that my meeting with Sara was a miracle, a twist of fate.
I could say it now with absolute, heart-felt confidence!
Those two conflicting feelings—relief and terror—had been swirling inside me.
And now, more than anything, I needed to see Sara.
I wanted to run to her right now.
I could feel a sense of urgency, almost like a panic, overflowing from within me.