I wondered exactly when Takanashi-san had first caught my eye...
It was only natural for him to be curious, but even I had realized that he felt different from other boys before I was even consciously aware of it.
When I thought about my own nature...
Generally speaking, I rarely held a positive opinion of others.
I felt a particular aversion toward boys. This stemmed from my past experiences—their immature behavior and the sheer insincerity of those who would calmly confess their "love" with obvious ulterior motives, despite knowing nothing about me.
Since I had dealt with nothing but people like that, I couldn't help but feel a sense of loathing.
Of course, I understood that there were serious, dependable people out there, starting with the President. While I didn't intend to treat such people with hostility, it was a fact that I kept them at a distance behind a wall.
I had built walls between myself and other girls as well.
There were many reasons for that, but the worst of it was the sheer frequency with which I faced bitter resentment from girls after I rejected the insincere confessions of boys they liked. I didn't want to remember those times, but I could still recall some of the horrible things they said to me.
Some people simply despised the fact that I turned everyone down. I was certain they said even worse things behind my back.
It was only because Natsumi stood by me during that period of resentment that we became friends. But as for the others... no, I should stop. Just thinking about it made me feel ill.
I eventually decided that if I could convince those around me that I was simply "on another level," I could silence the rumors. I focused on my grades, became the Student Council Vice President, and built a reputation by handling every request and student opinion within my power.
As a result, everyone began to praise me as if they’d forgotten their previous malice... even if that praise included the very people who used to whisper about me in the shadows.
That was the person I had become.
...When I considered it in that light, Takanashi-san didn't fit any of those negative archetypes.
The moments that left the strongest impression on me were...
The flowerbed, of course.
Without seeking recognition or praise, he had tended to it in silence. I felt a deep sense of gratitude for that.
And then... the sight of him comforting a crying child in the Shopping Street had been particularly striking.
"Meow-meow, did you lose your mommy?"
He had been speaking to the little girl in such a charming, gentle way. It felt so natural; I was amazed he could interact with a child with such ease.
Afterward, he held the hand of the girl, who had stopped crying, and walked back in the direction she had come from. I assumed he went to search for her mother.
In that moment, Takanashi-san's smile and the sight of his back as he walked hand-in-hand with that child left a profound impression on me. Even afterward, I occasionally saw him carrying that same little girl while I was on my way to school. That kind expression of his was truly memorable.
It was a side of someone I could never have imagined from the immature boys I had encountered until then.
It was around that time when the incident on the Rooftop occurred. Takanashi-san appeared during a lunch break—a time he didn't usually visit—and we were able to speak for the first time.
...At that point, I think I already felt that Takanashi-san was different from the others.
The boy who had helped my Grandmother was Takanashi-san as well.
Apparently, he had left without even giving his name, saying he didn't need any thanks. I had hoped to thank him properly if we ever met... and once I realized it was Takanashi-san, it somehow made perfect sense. I felt I had to show him my appreciation for everything he had done, including his kindness toward my Grandmother.
Both before and after we met, these experiences piled up, and I came to see Takanashi-san as someone I could trust—someone unique, for whom I felt a genuine affinity.
That was why I wanted us to be close.
The feelings I had previously dismissed as "mysterious" finally seemed to make sense.
Because of that, I had been more panicked than ever before at the thought that I had caused him a misunderstanding and made him sad. In the end, that panic had caused him even more trouble today.
Now that I was conscious of my feelings... I realized that I truly did feel a sense of closeness toward him—a deep, personal bond.
It felt a bit different from my friendship with Natsumi. Perhaps it was the difference in gender, or perhaps it was because so much had happened between us, including the events of today.
I wanted us to get along from now on.
...That was how I truly felt.