My personal creed has always been that everything in life is best done in moderation. Humans aren't designed to operate at 100% capacity all the time. If you keep pushing that hard, something is bound to break.
That was why I believed giving about 70% of my strength was perfectly fine for daily life. Of course, throughout a long life, there would surely be a few times when one faced a situation that demanded every ounce of strength. In those moments, one could give 100% or even 120%. But that was strictly for emergencies; for ordinary times, 70% sufficed.
I never had any desire to give my all for mundane days, and I wanted to avoid making an effort as much as possible.
I didn't mean to scoff at those who worked hard. I acknowledged that effort was necessary and thought it was amazing that people could do it... It was just that I personally didn't want to work hard, and I wanted to avoid effort whenever I could.
It wasn't that I lacked desire entirely. I wanted money, and I wanted to eat delicious food... but I didn't particularly care about having so much wealth that I could never spend it all, nor did I want to consume every delicacy in the world. As long as I had enough to live without any inconvenience in my daily life, I was fine.
One might have called me cold, or perhaps said I had withered away. However, I had no complaints about my life, and one way or another, I was living quite happily.
I believed all labor was fundamentally garbage, and I hated the structure of a society where one couldn't survive without working. But then again, if I lived a completely self-indulgent life without working at all, that didn't seem like it would be very fun either... When I considered how fun it was to be liberated by a holiday precisely because of daily labor, I thought that while labor was garbage, it might be necessary to lead a fulfilling life.
I liked booze, cigarettes, and gambling; I was a pacifist who hated trouble; and I didn't really have any convictions or pride... I recognized that I was a junk human, but as long as I didn't trouble others... I thought living loosely and happily was the best, so I didn't really worry about it.
Even though I thought labor was garbage and admitted to being a junk human, it wasn't as if I did a sloppy job or skipped out on work.
I engaged with my work properly and sincerely... I just didn't give it my all.
It wasn't as if I had some dramatic past or a specific catalyst that made me think this way; I had just been like this for as long as I could remember.
For someone like me, my honest feeling regarding the three who came from the Otherworld via a Summoning Accident was... well, that I didn't really care.
When the Summoning Accident actually happened and it was decided that Kaito-kun, Aoi-chan, and Hina-chan would stay at the mansion, the frequency with which they were discussed among the servants and maids remained high for a while.
In particular, regarding Kaito-kun—a man who, due to various circumstances, almost never would have visited Lilia-chan's Mansion otherwise—there were many sympathetic opinions as well as negative ones.
I thought sympathy was fine. After all, they were essentially thrown into an unknown world without warning, so they must have been anxious, and I thought it was a good thing to want to look out for them or be of help.
As for the negative opinions, honestly... I thought, "Are they idiots?" Regardless of whether he was an Otherworlder or a man, the master of the house, Lilia-chan, had welcomed him as a guest. I couldn't understand the idea of a servant changing how they treated someone based on their own personal likes or dislikes.
Whether they were a woman or a man, a local or an Otherworlder, if the master of the house, Lilia-chan, considered them a guest, then they were a guest and should be treated appropriately. That was what I considered normal, but maybe it was because there were some hot-blooded girls among the Former Members of the Order of Knights?
Well, Illness-sensei was clearly on Kaito-kun's side, and since there were many people who couldn't stand up to Illness-sensei, those negative opinions eventually faded away naturally.
As for my personal opinion, I really didn't care either way. Both sympathy and negativity consumed quite a bit of HP in their own way. I figured I would just handle the work I was given as a Maid of Lilia-chan's Mansion appropriately and treat him normally.
...You never really know how things will turn out, do you? Somehow, while doing that, Kaito-kun and I became quite close. Hmm, well, maybe that was it? Being pitied can be quite draining for the person on the receiving end, so maybe the sense of distance I provided by interacting with him in a flat state without thinking much about it was comfortable for him?
I didn't know... but we simply got along. I was quite lax about everything besides work and I was always relaxed... and Kaito-kun was the type who was also fairly relaxed in his private life. Well, unlike me, he was a boy who really stepped up when it counted, so it might have been rude to say we were alike, but we got along in that loose way and became friends... and before I knew it, I felt like I'd grown quite fond of him.
It wasn't like there was some dramatic event or a development like in a Romance Novel; we just talked normally, hit it off, became friends, and as we talked again and again, my affection naturally grew. I thought it was something like that.
If I had to say, I wondered if it was because I could stay loose and relaxed by Kaito-kun's side that made it so comfortable... Hmm, I really didn't know.
"...Vanessa-san? You suddenly have a contemplative look on your face. What's wrong?"
"Hmm. I was just thinking about what the catalyst is for falling in love with someone... but this seems like the kind of thing that gets troublesome if you overthink it. I'm done thinking about it."
"Ehh..."
"The catalyst or the motive or whatever doesn't really matter. As long as you understand your own feelings, that's enough, right? That's why, Kaito-kun, I love you~. So, give that last egg to me."
My goodness, one's own feelings were difficult things. It didn't feel pure enough to be called "love," yet it wasn't deep enough to be called "affection."
I... did not know the appropriate words to express the feelings I had for him.
So, well, it was fine. For now, as long as I was aware that I liked him, that I was enjoying this time right now, and that I could hope for days like this to continue from now on... that was probably enough.
Serious-senpai: "Probably, as she said herself, the fact that she interacted with him naturally from the start without either pitying or antagonizing him was the factor that raised the Affection Level from the Kaito side. There were moments where her sexy side made his heart flutter, and Kaito seemed to be conscious of her as a woman as well... Damn it, she seems to have quite a bit of Heroine Power... and a potential that could lead to a Sweet Story... How troublesome..."