Wait... now that I thought about it, something was off.
Among the wives who had rushed to my rescue, Rikochi was nowhere to be seen.
Then I noticed it—a machine covered in advertisements for a curry shop. It was positioned right in the middle of Shiyun's formation.
...It was Rikochi.
"Calling Rikochi... Why have you betrayed me?" I asked over the comms.
"I am merely chaperoning my cute little sisters," she replied.
"Tell me the truth."
"Shiyun-chan promised to build me a Curry-exclusive Room! And the Taikyoku Nation is footing the bill!"
I had been forced to restrict Rikochi's cooking frequency because of the lingering smells. Her spice blends were just too authentic. She used ingredients I barely understood, like ghee, and she was always trying to sun-dry rice in the middle of the palace.
"She said I could make Biryani whenever I want!"
"Ah, you traitor! You actually gave in to your stomach!"
"Leo-kun, you of all people should understand... a person's appetite is a sacred thing..."
The sheer weight of her conviction was staggering. Honestly, if I were in her shoes, I probably would have turned traitor in a heartbeat too.
"Guh!"
There was no helping it. For now, Rikochi was the enemy. Fine then! See if I care! Stupid, stupid Rikochi!
Just then, a white machine approached from behind us. It looked like a slightly older model. Was that a Proone Army Standard Machine?
"Your Majesty. I am Student Isaac of the Galactic Empire Officer Academy Branch School. I am here to assist the King of Chronos!"
"Isaac-kyun..."
Truly, friends were the greatest treasure a man could have. This was the true meaning of Friendship Power.
"Regrettably, I lost the lottery and ended up on Your Majesty's side, but I intend to fight with everything I have!" Isaac declared.
"I figured as much!" I shouted back.
Dammit! Shiyun's talent for political maneuvering and pre-battle networking was terrifying!
"Lady Shiyun! A masterful command!" I called out to the other side.
"I am the disciple of Veronica-oneesama, after all!" Shiyun replied proudly.
Wifey... you... you really raised an unbelievable monster...
Whatever! I was going to do my best!
"Isaac! You handle the floating batteries with Eddy and the others! With your marksmanship, you'll be much more effective over there!"
"Your Majesty... you actually know my grades?!" Isaac's voice was thick with surprise.
"I've memorized the records of every single child from Proone! I'm responsible for your futures, you know!"
I meant it. While the direct catalyst for their country's fall had been Latarnia's intervention, the ultimate destruction of Proone was a result of my own inadequacy. In hindsight, I shouldn't have been so indecisive; I should have just conquered them immediately and banned cannibalism. I could have negotiated with Latarnia to handle the debts later.
That was why I felt such a heavy responsibility toward Proone. I was even leaning on Latarnia now to make them cough up the funds for the refugees. I had fully disclosed the truth of how their country fell, teaching the Proone children the exact circumstances and history from every angle.
Even during the Chronos Assembly Session, I had officially admitted that my failure to decide on a conquest the moment the 'Confusion Due to Illness' came to light was the primary cause of Proone's downfall. It was currently being researched at the Imperial Officer Academy as a political case study and served as a regular assignment for the students. Most of their reports ended with the same conclusion: "What on earth were we even supposed to do...?"
Nevertheless, I intended to keep paying my respects to the memory of Proone.
"Guh! Student Isaac... I shall carry out my mission!" Isaac managed to choke out.
He clearly had a lot on his mind, but for now, we were fighting together.
Right. Time to deal with the rest.
"Melissa, you have a free hand! Just don't overextend! Claire, you're with me. Ren, provide cover! Also... keep in mind that I'm the one who'll be teaching Rikochi a lesson, so stay out of that one."
"Understood," they replied in unison.
I wouldn't forgive Rikochi! I was definitely going to make her see reason!
"Daryaaaaaa!"
I started by picking off the Latarnia Army with my plasma rifle. My shots were actually connecting for once. Of course, the Latarnia forces weren't total fools; they fired back with everything they had. But we simply danced around their shots. This was like a game of Reversi—just because they had more pieces on the board didn't mean they were winning!
Then, the Ogre God Nation units tried to close in for melee combat. I was just glad Saria had been hospitalized! If that guy had been on the field, the difficulty level would have been off the charts. His people didn't have much in the way of coordination; they just swarmed whoever looked strongest.
Were they swarming me? It wasn't that simple. Melissa, who was acting as a solo guerrilla, was drawing far more attention. Consequently, a good portion of them broke off to challenge her.
The real surprise was Claire. She wasn't in her usual Exclusive Machine specialized for Stegoro. She was using a Standard Machine equipped with a mid-range rifle and a sword. I expected her to struggle with the different setup...
Kaboom!
She was casually disabling the Ogre God Nation machines with her rifle, one after another.
"Leo... did you forget that my primary role is a sniper?" she asked.
Right. I forgot. Since I belonged to the group that wasn't particularly gifted with rifles, I drew my sword instead.
"Uesama Attack!"
I began slashing through the enemy team's machines. However, since it wasn't an Exclusive Machine, the response time was sluggish. I was on the verge of being surrounded when our sniper, Ren, provided cover. An Ogre God Nation machine was pierced by a rifle bolt and went dead in the water.
"Ren! Nice!"
"My Lord! Tatiana's machine is approaching!" Ren warned.
"Wait, what about Eddy and the others?"
"They seem to be struggling against Edge-kun's group."
Good grief.
"Aniki! Gehehehehe! Let's settle this once and for all!" Tatiana laughed, using a vulgar voice that no young girl should ever possess. That brat... she really did have the aptitude for a Villainous Noble Daughter.
There was nothing for it but to go all out. I charged straight at Tatiana.
"I've seen through that move! You always use it!" she shouted.
She had clearly been studying our matches in the simulator, where I beat her with the same move every time. She began rotating her floating batteries, firing beams from every conceivable angle.
Wait, those were the Zork Mother's movements!
"Fuhahahahaha! Finishing Move: Nyanko Typhoon!"
The name was absolutely pathetic, but the power was the real deal. With the limited mobility of a Standard Machine, I couldn't dodge everything. I braced myself, ignoring the minor hits and focusing entirely on evading the fatal ones.
Hoisa, hoisa, hmph!
I spiraled through the storm of beams, closing the distance to Tatiana.
"What?! You broke through?!"
"Punishment!"
I slashed through Tatiana's machine, disabling it instantly. It was a good thing these Standard Machines had such thin armor.
Alright, that was one Named down! Next was Rikochi!
"Eddy! How are things over there?!" I shouted into the radio.
"I can't even get close because of Edge's ESP! Gwaaaaaargh!"
A massive explosion, on the scale of a fleet's main battery, erupted in the distance. Edge had definitely awakened. I was just glad I wasn't the one facing him.
"Heh heh heh... The era of unlimited Biryani has arrived!" Rikochi declared, cracking her whip.
She was being completely serious!
"Look, I'll stop being selfish! I'll stop complaining that bread doesn't feel like a real meal, so can't you just let me off the hook?!" I pleaded.
"Let me make Dosa whenever I want," she demanded.
"Fine, yes, go ahead!"
"Let me make Dal Fry too!"
That was the bean curry.
"But I like chicken better!" I protested.
The whip snapped toward me with a violent crack.
"Gyahhhhhhh!" I screamed, dodging purely on instinct while tears pricked my eyes. I couldn't even see the damn thing!
"And don't you dare complain if I make Saag Curry!"
That was the green spinach one. It was notoriously unpopular with the men.
"But people have such strong opinions about that..."
Crack!
"Gyahhhhhhh!"
She was terrifying! A grudge over food was truly the most frightening thing in the galaxy!
"Well, you were the one who got mad when I made avocado tortillas and told me I had to put meat in them! And you said you hated white peas!"
"I won't forgive you for that!" she screamed back.
And so, my high-stakes duel with my wife devolved into a petty, screaming match over food grievances.