We were all starting to feel like nursery school teachers trying to manage a mob of toddlers.
It was in those moments that we truly realized just how brilliant Isono was. He didn’t hold the title of Minister of Foreign Affairs for the Kingdom of Chronos for nothing.
As for me, since I was scheduled to participate in the upcoming events, I was busy training with Katori-sensei. Melissa and Rikochi had joined in as well.
"Here I come!"
Katori-sensei swung that wooden sword of his at me in a vicious slash. Since it was just a wooden sword, we were only making contact, so I focused on parrying and dodging his strikes.
"Stop running!"
"I can’t exactly go head-to-head with you!"
I stayed mindful of my center, maintaining a triangular stance while focusing on my footwork. People often called it shuffling, but there were plenty of exceptions to that rule.
"Gah, you’ve even improved your footwork!"
"Well, I do practice every single day!"
The moment I managed to circle around him diagonally, I landed a solid blow to his torso. Katori-sensei stepped back, slamming my sword down to parry the strike. I’d expected that much! Using the momentum from the parry as a wind-up, he immediately lunged with a thrust. Called it again!
He aimed with surgical precision right for my throat. I tilted my body, dodging at the absolute last second. Whoa—that thrust was intended to go right through the back of my skull!
Seeing Katori-sensei lunge forward, I closed the distance and charged. Aiming to cave in his face, I swung my elbow up from below. Die, you old man!
"As if that'll hit me!"
Katori-sensei countered with an internal hand knife strike. Oh, so we're doing that now! I tossed my wooden sword aside and ducked into a weaving maneuver while guarding my head. I slipped under the hand knife and buried a blow into his gut!
"You brat! I thought we were practicing swordsmanship!"
Despite his complaining, he threw his own wooden sword away, circled to my side, and swung his arm down in a guillotine strike aimed at the base of my neck. I dodged the strike, planted my hands on the ground, and wrapped my legs around his torso.
Crab Scissors!
Grab!
Wait, what? He was already in position for a Giant Swing. His inhuman core strength had completely countered my leg lock.
"Die!"
He launched into the Giant Swing, spinning me around and around.
"Migyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"
Then, toss. I was flung away like a bag of trash. I rolled through the impact, performed a perfect breakfall, and sprang back up with my arms raised.
"That didn't even hurt..."
His flying kick was already screaming toward me! Seriously?! A sloppy dodge would just lead into a follow-up rush, so I stepped forward to catch the strike.
"You brat! Is that how you treat your master?"
"Dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
I caught him and slammed him down with a backdrop suplex, dropping him right on his head. Naturally, I was playing for keeps. There was no such thing as holding back against a man like him. But, true to form, he somehow twisted mid-air and landed a clean breakfall. Was he a cat?
I was kicked away to create some distance.
"Sensei! I! Request! A! Break, sir!"
"Me too!"
And so, we took a break. Charlotte and the others watching from the sidelines were buzzing with chatter.
"What was that?"
"Is the King of Chronos always this intense during practice?"
"Actually, he was being gentler than usual, right?" Melissa and Rikochi laughed.
"Yeah, at least he wasn't swinging around a wire-made Urumi."
"And they weren't using live blades. No eye-gouging or groin strikes today, either."
"...Um, Imperial Guard. Go have Katori-sensei give you some training."
Yes! The number of victims was growing! Now I could finally get some rest!
With a smirk, someone bowed and entered the dojo. It was Eddy. It seemed he was late because of work.
"Oh, you came at a good time. This is our instructor. Eddy, give the Imperial Guard a proper taste of practical combat training."
"Yes, sir!"
"Oh, the tragedy. I've got a bruise..." I pretended to sob.
"Here, take a healing nanomachine," Rikochi said, handing me a tablet.
"Goddammit." My wives were truly merciless.
"Shall we get some training in as well?"
"Sure~."
When Melissa said that, Rikochi took up her sword and shield.
"I like it. You're a pain to fight!"
"Here I come!"
It looked less like a martial arts session and more like a clash between two legendary kaiju. Both used ancient styles, trading heavy, violent blows.
Despite the chaos, my mind was occupied with what to cook for lunch. I wanted meat. Maybe I’d make Chinjao Rosu... A steak would be fine too, but those idiot boys never eat their vegetables.
I watched Eddy start his session with the Rosaria Empire. Man, safe training is the life, isn't it? But Charlotte didn't understand the reality of our situation. Watching our "sparring" had clearly left her incredibly anxious. I felt a bit bad for the Imperial Guard, so I decided to follow up with her.
"Charlotte, you don't need to be so stressed. In a real battle, most of the fighting happens in mid-range shootouts anyway."
It was perfectly common sense. The stars of the battlefield were the battleships. Missiles were truly the ultimate justice.
"Though our King doesn't actually get hit by bullets," Eddy added unhelpfully.
Why do you have to say unnecessary things, Eddy-kun?!
"That's right. Leo-kun dodges missiles, too," Rikochi added.
"My husband can sink a battleship all by himself with a single Humanoid Fighter, you know," Melissa chimed in.
"Imperial Guard! Hone your skills while you are here in Chronos!" Charlotte shouted.
"No, like I said, making standard strategies more precise is better for cost-performance!"
"Improve your skills enough to at least land a single blow on a combat-type Jester!"
"Wait, am I considered a combat-type?"
Eddy made a face that said, Is this guy an idiot? "If you're not a combat-type, then who is?"
"Kyu?" I gave them my best puppy-dog eyes.
"Don't you dare try to hide behind that cute act! That face is just annoying!"
While we were having that exchange, the boys started arriving one after another.
"Good morning!"
"Alright, time to train."
"Leo, what's for lunch?"
"Hey, don't jump straight to food! ...Chinjao Rosu."
"Alright, let's do our best!"
"I haven't gotten Nina-san's approval yet."
"It'll be fine. Nina-san was heading this way too... look."
"Hello there~."
Nina-san arrived, carrying a naginata.
"Nina, Leo was asking if Chinjao Rosu is okay for lunch?"
"Sure thing~. But make it with plenty of vegetables."
Lots of vegetables? Something seemed off.
"Did something happen?"
"I've put on weight..."
"Ah. Right. Sorry."
"Wait, regarding the shiitake mushrooms..."
The boys started throwing their wooden swords.
"That's dangerous, you idiots!"
"If you dare put shiitake in there, there will be hell to pay!"
A food conflict was happening here, too. Ah, yes—the eternal war between the "onions and shiitake belong in this dish" faction and the "keep that filth out" faction. Thinking about it calmly, I was firmly in the "don't put either in" faction.
"I'm putting the green peppers in, no matter what!"
"Add extra bamboo shoots!"
"You got it!"
Those were the kinds of peaceful days I spent, even while buried under a mountain of work. And then, the day of the sports festival finally arrived.
Oh, I want to hold a curry festival at the station square, too.
"Ah, yes. Approved."