"Big bro... feed me..."
Tatiana stumbled into the dining hall, her shift at the first-aid station finally over. She looked absolutely drained.
Having served as a medic during the Zork War, Tatiana’s clinical skills were in a league of their own. She handled everything from routine checkups and assisting in surgeries to treating civilians and patching up my rowdy squad whenever they got themselves mangled. She also frequently tended to me whenever I was on the brink of death.
Between her natural talent and the ESP healing powers she’d picked up from me, her experience level was through the roof. Naturally, she’d caught the attention of the professors at the Imperial Officer Academy’s Faculty of Medicine—the same ones who mentored Kevin.
I could see the writing on the wall. It would go exactly the same way it did with Kevin. One day, she’d find a medical school application sitting on her desk. Then, before she knew what was happening, a group of smiling graduate students—doctors now, like Kevin—would show up. They’d lock the door behind them and force her to study until her brain melted.
Well, Tatiana was sharp, and her physical stamina was high even by Kamishiro Squad standards. I had a feeling a physician license would just materialize in her hand before long.
One-oh-one had also been targeted. She had a high academic aptitude simply because she was so earnest and diligent.
As I was thinking this, One-oh-one arrived as well.
"I have arrived, and I am hungry, sir!"
For some reason, they both gravitated toward me. This resulted in a sudden collision with Charlotte.
"Yo," Tatiana grunted.
"U-umu," Charlotte replied, slightly taken aback.
"Good work today, ma'am!" One-oh-one added with a crisp salute.
Neither of them seemed to realize exactly who they were talking to.
"Which of these is the Saint?" Charlotte whispered to me.
"The tiny one," I whispered back.
Tatiana promptly kicked me. "Don't you dare mention my height!"
She followed up with a barrage of punches. She seemed genuinely annoyed.
"So, you are the Saint?" Charlotte asked.
"People keep calling me that for some reason," Tatiana muttered.
"Charlotte-chan, this is the rumored Saint Tatiana."
"Nice to meet ya."
"Hungry? Want some okonomiyaki?" I offered.
I handed her some of the okonomiyaki the Chamberlain had bought in bulk. I gave some to One-oh-one, too. Knowing those two would inevitably shake me down for food, he’d been proactive and bought extra.
"Thanks," Tatiana said, taking a bite.
"I've got yakitori, too."
"Score!"
"Potatoes! Sir, are there any potatoes?!" One-oh-one chirped.
"Here you go, One-oh-one. Fries."
"Hooray!"
"Ah... wait," Charlotte said, peering at the other girl. "Are you the Zork Queen?"
"The Zork Queen? I am Second Lieutenant One-oh-one, the Mother... or something like that, sir!"
The titles were a bit of a mess, but since she hadn't actually given birth, "Queen" had become her official designation.
"One-oh-one, you're a Major now," I reminded her.
"Oh, right! I'm a Major, sir!"
It was a whole thing. There had been a massive debate over whether the Zork Queen and the Saint could remain company-grade officers. In the end, they were both promoted to Major under a specialist classification.
(Shiyun, as a foreign VIP studying at the Imperial Officer Academy, no longer held an official rank.)
"But in my heart, I am still a military nurse, sir!" One-oh-one declared.
That might have been what she thought, but the Galactic Empire Army High Command’s stance was basically: "Once they pass the National Medical Examination, they're functionally Majors anyway."
The military was full of Majors in specialist roles—doctors, lawyers, technical officers, and professors—so it wasn't hard to slot them in. There was a general consensus that they should just turn Tatiana and One-oh-one into doctors as soon as possible. They’d clearly developed a taste for it after Kevin’s success. Honestly, it was the best way to keep everyone happy and settle their statuses once and for all.
"The two of you are... well, how should I put it? Quite ordinary," Charlotte remarked.
"I mean, I'm just a commoner," Tatiana said.
"Not really, not anymore."
"Whatever. My territory is being managed by Big Sister Claire anyway."
Well, she had a point. It was impossible for her to do it herself; commoners didn't have the administrative know-how. That’s why Claire had dispatched a deputy governor to handle the logistics.
"Anyway, uh... Lady Charlotte, was it?"
"Just Charlotte is fine, Saint."
"Then I'd appreciate it if you'd stop calling me 'Saint,'" Tatiana replied.
"Understood, Tatiana."
"Please call me One, ma'am!" One-oh-one added.
"Understood, One."
"So, Charlotte, where to next?" Tatiana asked.
"Umu. I wish to hear this light music I have heard so much about."
"Let's do it! We should go grab Shiyun, too!"
On paper, Tatiana, One-oh-one, and Shiyun were all members of the Light Music Club, but they were exempt from the club's "hellish" training sessions. They didn't do live performances; they just played in a band as a hobby.
They headed off to enjoy the festival, flanked by their guards. It was good to see them getting along. Besides, they were perfectly safe. They were being watched over by the Saint's Personal Guard—an elite unit composed of specialists from Despair-san, Chronos, Latarnia, and the Ogre God Nation.
As Kawagon, I was moved to tears by the growth of my junior sisters.
Now then, it was time to check on Claire.
Since pro-wrestling could be held indoors, I’d slotted it into the Cultural Festival schedule instead of the sports tournament. Surely, they wouldn't be able to pull off a massive tournament like they did last time... right?
The problem was that those guys—Master Tank and his crew—were entirely self-sufficient. They handled everything from monetization and management to the actual promotion. They weren't under our direct administrative control, and there was no way to tie them down with government red tape.
When I arrived at the Pro-wrestling Venue, I checked the schedule for Master Tank's Pro-wrestling Class. There was an exhibition match listed, and it looked like Claire’s turn was coming up soon.
I bought some merch and picked up tickets for my Imperial Guard Knight Order. I also made a cash donation as a gift, handing it over to the Ogre God Nation Person at the reception. I threw in some protein supplements, some snacks from a nearby stall, and some California rolls for good measure.
Inside, Claire’s followers were already waving cheering fans and shouting her name. She was my wife, but seeing her as an idol-wrestler always gave me mixed feelings.
"Claire-cha—n!"
With a loud bang from the set-piece fireworks, Claire appeared, wearing her mask! The crowd went wild. She was decked out in an idol-style wrestling costume.
Then, Master Tank’s voice boomed over the speakers. "We are honored to have her husband, His Majesty Leo, in attendance today!"
Before I knew it, I was handed a bouquet of flowers and ushered into the ring.
"I love you! Do your best!" I shouted.
The second the words left my mouth, Masked Nakajima lunged out from below. She caught me with a stiff lariat.
"Buberah!" I grunted as I hit the mat. "Hey! If that had been anyone else, you would've been injured!"
As if on cue, an Ogre God Nation person acting as a second handed Nakajima a folding chair. I was actually a little annoyed now. When she swung the chair, I checked her with a front kick. As she doubled over, I grabbed her and delivered a Stone Cold Stunner!
Bshaa! The fireworks ignited perfectly.
It was all a charade—a complete improv performance.
Someone handed me two cans of beer. I smashed them together against my forehead, popped them open with a headbutt, and poured the liquid into my mouth.
Oh. It was non-alcoholic. I guess they had to keep it family-friendly.
"Gwahahaha! Here, Nakajima! Drink up!"
I hauled Nakajima to her feet and forced the non-alcoholic beer down her throat. I made a show of winding up for an elbow drop to the gut, but pulled the strike at the last second.
"Wooooo!"
The crowd roared with approval. More fireworks went off.
And so, the eve of the festival concluded on a high note. Charlotte, Tatiana, and the others seemed to have bonded, and the Cultural Festival was a hit.
Now, the only problem... was the upcoming Sports Festival without Isono.