To be honest, I was riding high.
April, high school, a brand-new uniform.
Just those three things made me feel like my life was finally on the upswing.
With my heart dancing at the sight of the new school building, I headed up the stairs. I was in such a great mood that I practically found myself keeping time, stepping up the flight with a rhythmic bounce.
The girl walking ahead of me was likely a fellow freshman. She looked tense, her steps cautious as if she were savoring the weight of each one.
I get it. I totally get that feeling.
My gaze, which had been fixed on my own feet until now, naturally drifted forward, and then…
…Wait. What was with her posture?
Was that some kind of new dance trend?
She was tipping backward. Even something as obvious as that was hard to process when it happened so abruptly; my brain simply couldn't keep up.
Before I knew it, the girl who had been in front of me was right by my side. She was in an even more impossible position than before—she was practically… falling?
(Wait, is she… falling?!)
That single moment felt incredibly long, as if time itself were pausing to wait for my decision.
Despite how long it felt, I didn't actually stop to think. I reached out by reflex.
I felt a sudden sensation of weightlessness.
I gripped her arm with my left hand and put everything I had into a swing, tossing her forward toward the safety of the landing.
(…Ah, crap.)
As I expected, I didn't have the core strength to pull that off and stay upright.
My feet left the ground. There was nothing left to support my weight.
Regretting an action after the fact is a common human experience, but even so, letting her fall hadn't been an option.
I was currently plummeting.
That was the only way I could summarize the situation.
My eyes were fixed on the girl I’d saved. I could see her screaming something at me, her face twisted in a desperate expression. I wondered what she was saying.
Then, slowly—so very slowly—her skirt began to flip up.
(…No way.)
In that instant, my composure evaporated.
Adrenaline surged through me in a final, death-defying rush.
Hurry up! Flip faster!
If I’m going to die here, the least I deserve is a school-sanctioned panty flash!
Get out of the way, fabric!
Don’t you dare ruin my one chance at a panty shot, you pathetic scrap of cloth!
I had decided to live out my youth in high school, damn it!
I let out a silent, desperate scream.
A moment later, my vision plunged into darkness.
I really died this time.
Was my entire life… defeated by a piece of fabric?
Everything went black, and I was certain of my demise.
…Or so I thought.
The back of my eyelids felt bright, so I tried to open them.
“…It’s an unfamiliar ceiling.”
I’d always wanted to say that line at least once.
Well, dramatic quotes aside, it really was a ceiling I didn't recognize. It seemed that falling down the stairs hadn't been enough to kill me after all.
But where was I?
All I could see was the ceiling, but I could tell for sure that this wasn't a hospital.
I tried to turn my head and realized something.
It wouldn't move.
No, to be more precise—I didn't know how to move it.
I tried to exert force, but my body refused to listen. Instead, all I felt was a soft sensation against my back.
Hey now, who gave me such a heavy dose of anesthesia? My body won't budge a single millimeter.
I figured I should call for help. I opened my mouth to speak.
“Ah—”
The sound that came out was a thin, frail noise that sounded nothing like my own voice.
…Wait.
Hold on, hold on!
I think I’ve figured it out. The truth of the situation—what had happened to me.
As Minato Habata, a man with a reputation for being quick on the uptake and an IQ of 200 million, I knew exactly what this was.
This was probably my life flashing before my eyes. A high-tech montage.
Modern near-death experiences are impressive. Is this me as a baby? Wow, they really nailed the realism on this one.
Question: If this is a memory, do I recognize this ceiling?
A fatal contradiction shattered my conclusion.
Come to think of it, I’d never seen this ceiling before in my life.
Then where am I? Maybe it really is a hospital? No, but—
Suddenly, the door opened with a click.
“…Honestly, you didn't all have to come with me.”
“But Okusama, considering the possibility of an emergency—”
I heard multiple voices. As they spoke, footsteps drew closer.
At the edge of my vision, I saw flashes of black and white swaying.
Aprons. Skirts. Matching outfits.
…Maids?
Wait, hold on. Do hospitals keep maids on staff now? No, this room didn't feel like a hospital at all.
“Be quiet. …Oh, he’s awake.”
The atmosphere shifted with those words. All at once, every gaze in the room converged on me.
A woman approached and gently scooped me up into her arms. I felt her warmth much more clearly than before.
Whoa, she’s a total knockout…
“Thank goodness… you opened your eyes for me.”
Her voice was gentle. She was a stranger, and yet, a strange sense of calm settled deep in my chest.
Something was wrong. This was undeniably weird.
Despite everything, being in this woman's arms felt… natural. Like it was exactly where I was supposed to be.
“My cute, cute little Luka-chan!”
While my brain struggled to keep up, my mouth moved on its own.
“Ah—…”
The sound was pathetically weak.
…Yeah, I’m definitely a baby.