Chapter 50: Bulletin Board ⑥

[Dungeon!] The Thread for Discussing Adventurers and Streamers #2418

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138: Ordinary Anonymous [Breaking News] Reima the Summoner was spotted on a date with an insanely gorgeous girl.

139: Ordinary Anonymous I’m going to need a play-by-play on that.

140: Ordinary Anonymous Wait, what actually happened?

141: Ordinary Anonymous Fine, I’ll explain. It all started about an hour and a half ago. I’d gone to see a horror movie by myself...

142: Ordinary Anonymous "By myself." Lol.

143: Ordinary Anonymous You didn't have anyone to go with?

144: Ordinary Anonymous ...Loo-ser! All by his lonesome!

145: Ordinary Anonymous Let me turn that back on you. Did any of you thread-dwellers actually think we were the type of people who went to the movies with friends on our days off?

146: Ordinary Anonymous My bad.

147: Ordinary Anonymous I'm sorry. Put the knife down. That hit way too close to home.

148: Ordinary Anonymous I’ll forgive you. Just listen.

149: Ordinary Anonymous I was all ears.

150: Ordinary Anonymous I was waiting, stark naked.

151: Ordinary Anonymous Put some damn clothes on.

152: Ordinary Anonymous Anyway, to keep it simple, Reima was on a date with this beauty with silver-blue hair. They looked so close it honestly made me want to just end it all.

153: Ordinary Anonymous ...I know we weren't getting photos, but I needed a more detailed description of her. I was curious.

154: Ordinary Anonymous My vocabulary wasn't up to the task. She looked like she belonged in another dimension. Everything else just faded into the background.

155: Ordinary Anonymous I wasn't expecting much, but now I'm definitely interested.

156: Ordinary Anonymous I wanted to see her, even if only once.

157: Ordinary Anonymous Wait, silver-blue hair... that sounded familiar.

158: Ordinary Anonymous Ah, wasn't it that wolf-girl from the Mythology Dungeon?

159: Ordinary Anonymous That was her! She didn't have the beast ears, but she was a perfect match otherwise.

160: Ordinary Anonymous I passed them too. Seriously, what was with that girl? She was stunning.

161: Ordinary Anonymous ...She was humming to herself the whole time. It was cute, wasn't it?

162: Ordinary Anonymous It was so far beyond anything I'd ever seen that it was actually a little terrifying.

163: Ordinary Anonymous I wished I’d seen her.

164: Ordinary Anonymous ...I realized then that goddesses really did exist.

165: Mad Doctor☆ Hello, my fellow thread-dwellers. Things have been dull lately, so I brought some gossip for you.

166: Ordinary Anonymous Oh, it was the research geek.

167: Ordinary Anonymous The crazy one.

168: Ordinary Anonymous It’s the genius magic-item scientist!

169: Ordinary Anonymous Worship her. Everyone, worship her.

170: Ordinary Anonymous She was technically a beauty, too.

171: Ordinary Anonymous Too bad she ruined it with her personality, her behavior, her instincts... basically everything.

172: Ordinary Anonymous She was the poster child for "dangerous person."

173: Mad Doctor☆ Alright, I just identified everyone who insulted me. You’d better sleep with one eye open.

174: Ordinary Anonymous I'm sorry, please forgive me. Her pranks were the one thing that actually scared me.

175: Ordinary Anonymous Wait, some kind of video started playing on my window...!

176: Ordinary Anonymous Terrifying. Absolutely terrifying.

177: Mad Doctor☆ Honestly, that’s what happened when people defied a perfect beauty like me☆.

178: Ordinary Anonymous I was so sorry.

179: Ordinary Anonymous ...This person was definitely unhinged.

180: Mad Doctor☆ Moving on, here was an interesting video for you all. It was Reima-kun’s battle record.

181: Ordinary Anonymous What?

182: Ordinary Anonymous When did those two even get acquainted?

183: Ordinary Anonymous I appreciated the content, but I was worried about Reima-kun.

184: Ordinary Anonymous I felt bad for the fifteen-year-old. He was probably forced into some weird experiment.

185: Ordinary Anonymous I was going to watch it anyway.

186: Ordinary Anonymous Fine, I guess I’d take a look.

187: Ordinary Anonymous ——I was looking forward to this!

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325: Ordinary Anonymous The conclusion was simple: Reima was the strongest.

326: Ordinary Anonymous Thread dismissed!

327: Ordinary Anonymous Wait, that was way too fast. We needed to analyze this.

328: Ordinary Anonymous Don't ask for the impossible. He did all that without using a single Summoned Beast.

329: Ordinary Anonymous How did he clear every one of the hologram trials built by Mad Doctor☆ in an instant? Even the government used those.

330: Ordinary Anonymous A Griffon was B-rank, right? How did he take it out in one hit?

331: Ordinary Anonymous Because it was Reima.

332: Ordinary Anonymous That made sense.

333: Ordinary Anonymous He sliced a Minotaur in half, one-shotted a Gazer, and caused a Hellhound’s instant death.

334: Ordinary Anonymous He could use guns, and he was good with a scythe, too.

335: Ordinary Anonymous His melee performance was insane.

336: Ordinary Anonymous I wondered how anyone even got that strong.

337: Ordinary Anonymous People who "awakened" later in life tended to be powerful, right? Like [Guardian] or [Carnage].

338: Ordinary Anonymous He was already past that level.

339: Ordinary Anonymous And he didn't even call out his Summoned Beasts.

340: Ordinary Anonymous That sword called [Dainsleif] was also ridiculous.

341: Ordinary Anonymous ...Something about that was definitely off.

342: Ordinary Anonymous Wasn't that Colossus a new model? It was terrifying how fast he took it down.

343: Ordinary Anonymous Didn't someone say it had magic immunity?

344: Ordinary Anonymous Mad Doctor☆ wouldn't lie about that. It was probably true.

345: Mad Doctor☆ Yes, I built it that way. I incorporated [Adamantite] so it would have a magic-dissipation function. At least, that was the plan.

346: Ordinary Anonymous And yet it ended up looking like a total joke.

347: Ordinary Anonymous Those ice brambles growing out from the inside were brutal.

348: Ordinary Anonymous That was basically an instant-kill move.

349: Ordinary Anonymous I just knew that wasn't the kind of technique you were supposed to use on a human being.

350: Ordinary Anonymous Exactly. Seriously, exactly that.

351: Ordinary Anonymous What else happened? Oh, right—did he really one-shot the Machina Golem? The one that supposedly pushed Doctor to S-Rank?

352: Ordinary Anonymous Stop focusing on the part that made the least sense.

353: Ordinary Anonymous Was that thing even designed to be defeatable?

354: Ordinary Anonymous There was no way in hell.

355: Mad Doctor☆ I’ll admit, I was actually a bit depressed after that.

356: Ordinary Anonymous Rest in peace.

357: Ordinary Anonymous It was just karmic retribution for everything you'd done up until now.

358: Ordinary Anonymous Savor the feeling.

359: Perverted Gentleman By the way, what ever happened to Lady Laura’s naked apron?

360: Mad Doctor☆ I didn't have photos, but I’m pretty sure she went through with it. I’d set it up that way, after all.

361: Ordinary Anonymous The absolute best.

362: Ordinary Anonymous The only downside was that we couldn't see it ourselves.

363: Ordinary Anonymous You were completely insane, Mad Doctor☆.

364: Ordinary Anonymous She was just a sadist who forced some poor, innocent girl into an "anchor" challenge.

365: Ordinary Anonymous Total nutcase.

366: Mad Doctor☆ Well, what’s done is done. ...Anyway, here was the latest info. I heard Reima-kun was going on a Dungeon audit job soon.

367: Ordinary Anonymous Heh.

368: Ordinary Anonymous You were dropping way too many bombs today.

369: Ordinary Anonymous I’d been waiting for news like that!

370: Ordinary Anonymous I wondered where it would be.

371: Ordinary Anonymous Well, we’d just have to wait for the report.

372: Ordinary Anonymous Maybe that Dungeon that showed up on a mountain recently? That place was still uninvestigated.

373: Ordinary Anonymous Ah. Wait, wasn't that area under the jurisdiction of the [Guardian]?