365: Way Too Many Secret Weapons

The Story So Far...

With the Noblesse School Festival looming, the intermediate-year students led by Weiss aimed to snag the top spot in sales with their Cosplay Cafe. Their most formidable rivals? The upperclassmen led by Eva.

According to intelligence gathered beforehand, the seniors were planning a Maid Cafe. A bizarre wager had been struck: if Weiss’s group lost, they’d be subjected to a "jiggle-fest," but if they won, they’d get to do the "jiggling" themselves.

How will it all end?! The curtains are finally rising!

---

The School Festival had finally begun.

Just like every year, Magic Birds circled the campus, their cries signaling the start of the festivities. Even though this didn’t directly affect our academic points, I was fired up. I had to beat the upperclassmen in sales.

Our opponents were Sierra, Eleanor, Priscilla, Neil, and Eva.

...Good grief, just seeing those names listed together is enough to give me the shakes.

No, stay strong. Don't let them smell your weakness. This wasn't a battle of martial arts; it was a battle of wits—a cosplay showdown.

I had the student executive committee badge pinned to my chest, the same one I’d worn as a lowerclassman. It wasn't like I wanted the job, but I’d been told, "You're the only man for the task!" and somehow got roped in. I don’t even know that much about cosplay... Seriously.

By the way, the Noblesse School Festival is closed to the general public. Because of that, the hallways were packed exclusively with students. One particular classroom—ours—already had a massive line snaking down the corridor for our Cosplay Cafe.

"W-Weiss-kun!"

It was the mana-obsessed girl, Carta, running toward me.

Boing. Boing. Boing. Boing. Boing.

She was dressed as a Beastman, complete with cat ears and a long tail. But the most incredible—and distracting—thing was the way her "assets" were practically bursting out of her top. For a girl as shy as Carta to go this far... she must have really steeled her resolve.

Not bad, Carta. Not bad at all.

"I’ve witnessed your determination, Carta. I hear you loud and—"

"M-My cleavage! The fabric ripped! W-w-w-what am I going to do?!"

Wait, no. She wasn't showing off her resolve; she was just in a total panic.

She was definitely showing off a bit too much, though. A "feast for the eyes" (or a "wardrobe malfunction," depending on who you asked) right at the opening...

"Whoa, look at Carta! I can't believe she's putting herself on the line like that!"

"Senior Carta is seriously adorable..."

"Those rumors about the 'all-you-can-rub' bet must be true. I've gotta see who wins this!"

Regardless of the accident, Carta had successfully jump-started our sales. As expected of our heavy hitter.

Oh, right.

"Lilith."

"—Here!"

The moment I whispered her name, Lilith appeared out of thin air, dressed as a kunoichi.

The theme for our cosplay this time was "Interpretation Consistency." We wanted everyone who saw us to nod and think, Yes, that’s exactly right.

The surrounding students let out a collective "Ooooh!" when they saw her. She was wearing a miniskirt with black tights and a black mask covering the lower half of her face. Overall, the outfit was relatively modest, but that only made it more tempt—no, never mind.

"Patch Carta up, will you?"

"Leave it to me!" Lilith chirped.

She pulled out a sewing kit she had hidden in her cleavage and began stitching Carta’s outfit back together with lightning speed. It was a god-tier display of craftsmanship that drew gasps from the crowd—though I did hear a few voices that sounded borderline disappointed that the "view" was being covered.

Once Carta thanked her, Lilith vanished back into the shadows.

I made sure the students were lining up properly and then stepped inside the cafe in my capacity as an executive committee member.

"Welcome back."

Cecil, the elf, greeted me with her ears twitching. She was wearing short-shorts with knee-high socks. It was a look she’d normally never be caught dead in, complete with a perfect "absolute territory" reveal. She had even ditched her usual polite speech for a more casual, familiar tone to create an exquisite sense of "friendly distance." It was flawless.

"The look suits you, Cecil."

"Do you think so? I think the other girls are much cuter."

She gestured toward Shari, who was cosplaying as a Fallen Angel with black wings and her own set of knee-highs. Actually, that really does suit her.

Next to her stood Cynthia, dressed as the Ice Princess. She was actually radiating a faint, chilly mist, and her translucent white outfit was incredibly striking.

Beside her was Tura in a bunny girl outfit and fishnets. The curve of her thighs was... substantial, to say the least.

And then there was Olynn in a maid outfit.

...I’m just going to pretend I didn't see that.

"Vai-kun’s butler suit... so cool, so cool, so cool, so cool..."

A voice drifted from behind me. I didn't even have to turn around to know who it was. Luna, the Yandere Liquid Metal Slime. She was dressed in Gothic Lolita fashion, her skirt puffed out by a fluffy pannier.

Thanks to everyone’s efforts, the flow of customers was non-stop. Surely, we had this in the bag.

Still, I couldn't afford to be careless.

"Hey, Duke! Have you seen the drinks that were here?"

"Oh, Allen! I was thirsty, so I drank 'em!"

In the back, Allen and Sasami were working hard on the drink orders. I stood there long enough to watch Shari deliver a "Fallen Angel Open-Palm Strike" to Sasami for his comment, and then I headed over to the upperclassmen’s building for reconnaissance.

Judging by their experience with last year’s Maid Cafe, I didn’t think I’d need to worry about the logistics. Noblesse students have a high level of adaptability, after all. I wasn't quite ready to declare victory, but I felt a solid sense of confidence.

However, the moment I stepped into the upperclassmen’s building, I felt an overwhelming pressure.

There are way too many people here...

I crept forward tentatively, only to find a staggering crowd. The line actually stretched from the third floor all the way down to the first.

In the middle of the chaos, I spotted Belk and Meryl. They were dressed as a Goblin and a Saint, respectively. Wait, did they ditch their posts?

"Belk!"

"Oh, Senior Weiss! That butler suit looks amazing on you! What do you think of my Goblin look?"

"I don't care! More importantly, what’s with this line? What’s going on?"

I’d confirmed they were doing a Maid Cafe, but this was insane. I knew people would want to be served by the upperclassmen, but enough to wait in a line this long?

"It’s the Maid Cafe, sir. Senior Eva, Senior Priscilla, Senior Sierra, and Senior Eleanor are doing the hosting. Apparently, they’ll even sit right next to you! Plus, Senior Neil is incredibly popular," Meryl explained matter-of-factly.

S-Sit next to you?! Isn't that a violation of the Adult Entertainment Business Act? Is that even allowed? Wait, this is Noblesse. Damn it... I’m thinking with my old world's common sense again.

And now that I thought about it, Neil was popular with the underclassmen. His old "villain face" was gone, replaced by a "reformed good guy" persona that had his popularity ratings hitting the ceiling. On top of that, he was a fabulously wealthy high-ranking noble dedicated to the abolition of slavery.

"You should line up too, Senior Weiss!" Belk whispered seductively.

To have those famous, powerful women sitting right beside you while they serve you...

I’m so jeal—no! Stay focused! I am Weiss Fancent. I cannot give in to such worldly temptations.

"Sorry, but I have work to do."

I shook my head, trying to keep my eyes on the prize. Victory was the only option. I had to deploy our secret weapon—Teacher Milk—immediately. I’d already secured her promise to wear a maid outfit.

I hurried down the hall toward the staff room, but then Coco crossed my path. She was wearing a disheveled, miniskirt-style maid uniform. It was... well, it was that specific "supermarket clerk smoking behind the building" fetish.

"Boy. Why the rush?"

"W-Why are you wearing that...?"

"Hmm? Eva told me that if I stood in the classroom wearing this, she’d teach me some secret magic."

Sasuga, Eva. She knew exactly how to play on Coco’s obsession with magic. Those upperclassmen were playing for keeps. They weren't holding anything back.

"...Do you know where Teacher Milk is?"

"Ah, she’s in the courtyard."

I have to hurry. I have to hurry or we’re—

I stopped dead. I watched as a hulking, muscular Darius, dressed in a frilly maid outfit, climbed the stairs toward the upperclassmen's cafe.

My spirit finally broke.

---

Afterword

It’s been a while! I hope you’re all doing well. I apologize for the irregular updates.

Currently, I’m working hard on Volume 3 of the light novel. I expect to get it to you sometime next year, so please bear with me just a little longer.

In other news, I’ve been enjoying my daily life, like attending the Kadokawa thank-you party. Even as I tell myself I need to update more, my desire to become a full-time author led me to start some new projects. I’ve entered them into the Kakuyomu Contest 10, so I’d be honored if you took a look!

The flu is going around lately, so please stay safe (I actually caught it myself recently).

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